Logs:All Things Are Forgiven
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| RL Date: 23 May, 2011 |
| Who: Celadion, Shimana |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: Celadion seeks out Shimana; he has a confession to make. |
| Where: Cliffs, Western Island |
| When: Day 3, Month 11, Turn 25 (Interval 10) |
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| A rare afternoon break in the persistent autumn drizzle has proven the perfect opportunity for Shimana to escape up the cliffs that have been denied to her all-too-often of late. The path is slippery, but that doesn't seem to have stopped the older woman at all. She's perched in her customary place, atop a small rock near the north of the clifftop, and is staring out towards the horizon with customary stillness. Taking advantage in the break in the weather, Celadion is making his way up the familiar path. In the crook of his arm is a basket, currently covered up with a white cloth, the rare white clothes that still remain in the settlement, so it must be something out of the ordinary. He peers around the cliff top, looking for, and finding Shimana, "My mother was not wrong." This spoken in way of a greeting before he waves, "Hello Shimana. I hope the weather is treating you well." "She rarely is," Shimana agrees calmly, without bothering to turn towards the path - though an astute observer will notice the brief flicker of her gaze towards Celadion. "It's nice to see the sun, even if it's for just a little while, isn't it Celadion?" She does turn marginally then, offering a warm smile to the young man. "Nothing but rain coming, but it should be mild. What can I do for you? Surely you didn't come all this way to ask after the weather." "I am blessed with a mother who knows what's best, even if her foolish son often folds his ears in to keep from understanding." For a moment the young man hesitates and then comes closer so Shimana need not be disturbed from her view since he's intruding on her private time. "I came to offer an appology." And apparently more than just his words, it comes with a basket that he offers out to her. His dark skin hides any blush but the expression he wears shows the effort it has taken him to reach this point. "An apology?" Intrigued, Shimana leans forward to inspect the basket, though she only ruffles at the white folds without actually taking it. "What for, child?" Her smile deepens, and a hint of a tease enters her voice. "I don't know that I've seen you often enough, lately, for you to be giving me offense." Celadion's mouth works as he chews over words, luckily Shimana has something to look at in the basket. There are those delicate blooms found in that muddy marshes between river and sea, the blooms that are often used to ease stomach ailments but not nearly enough able bodied people who care to risk the nasty things in the mud to get to the flowering reeds. "I...have been upset...since Uhlre died. I heard the words that she would be fine and I took it to heart. When the sea was not merciful....I turned by heart away. Away from everything. I've had a hard heart towards you but I have come to believe that it was wrong to hold you accountable for what happened. I am still struggling with--things. This last storm hasn't helped." "Oh, Celadion, dear...." Shimana goes quiet, the earnestness of the young man's words dimming the pleased smile that had appeared upon realizing the basket was full of flowers. Drawing back, her hands fold atop her lap and her face falls into lines of sympathy. "It's only natural. Truly, there's nothing to apologize for. The sea is cruel, and it's hard to understand why we would be subjected to such hardships. I hadn't realized Uhlre's loss-- well, of course it would have been difficult. And now with Kima..." A soft sigh escapes her, and she reaches out to rest a gentle hand on Celadion's arm. "I wish I'd been able to do more to warn the children of the storm, just as I wish I'd been able to do more for the others. I can only do for those who are left to us-- please, Celadion, is there anything I can do for you?" For a moment, Celadion's jaw works and he nods his head but there are not words, just the attempt at being strong and stoney when most people on the island know he has such a soft heart. "Uhlre and I seemed crossed from the start. But, I thought," he begins, his voice rough, "That perhaps Kima and I." pause, "Well, that there might be a chance." He lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding in when she touches his arm and cracks a smile for her, "I only want the pain to ease. I've been throwing myself into work and playing games, but perhaps if I had not closed myself away from the sea and the signs....maybe I could have seen something more.... Maybe I should be looking." "It will ease, child, with time. Accepting that what the tide brings in is what it brings in is the first step. Come, please, sit with me." Shimana slides down on the rock, gesturing for Celadion to take a seat beside her. "I, myself, often find that when I am looking the hardest for something is when I need to relax and let go. Much like being caught in a rip current, sometimes the wisest path is simply to allow yourself to be carried for a time. Have you spoken about this with anyone? Your mother, or a friend perhaps?" Celadion settles down beside Shimana with the boneless grace of an althetic young man and along with the coming to earth is a gusty sigh. "Each time I feel that it's faded and I can move on, something pokes that part of me and brings it all up again. Like sicking up." He listens to her speak though, nodding his head to show his understanding as he draws his knees up towards his chest. "Um, I have spoken with my father about it mostly. Mother has offered an ear more than once but she...gets upset." And who can blame the woman who nearly died several times trying to have children. "My friends...they are good at distractions but not with understanding." Ah, boys. "I think you're proceeding wisely, Celadion. It's only what you can do. Accept. Listen to the sea, and try to interpret the signs. Rely on your family, because they care for you. And let your friends distract you with fun. There's no shame in living your life, and enjoying yourself; I like to think that those who are gone would want us to do these things." Shimana takes a deep breath, turning her gaze back out towards the horizon where a smudge of clouds are slowly building into something more. "What do you feel you want to do?" Celadion leans his bristly chin on his knee for a moment as he too turns his eyes to the sky where the ocean pleans against it in restless white caps. "I know I am lucky to have both of my parents, even if they aren't connected to me by blood. I should not be greedy." Then he turns it around, "Should I? To need 'more'?" He makes a face and lifts his chin from the knees, still looking outward, "I feel...lost. I feel like I could go on and build houses and repair tools but I need more. Father says I'm too young to apply for a voice with the elders and he's likely right but...I need to start cutting that path I think. I can't do that and keep my heart shielded as I have for....since she died." Shimana forces her gaze away from the horizon, though only with visible effort. "You are lucky," she agrees. "But that's not a reason not to want more; it's the privelege of the young. I think you might want a few turns yet before you try to make yourself old, dear." She's teasing again, but gently, and there's no sting in her voice. "If you were any other young man, I'd tell you that we'd find you a wife to settle you down. But... how would you feel about that?" There's a note to her voice, as if she's already anticipating the answer. Celadion's eyebrows lift in question but his chin goes back to his knee for a moment, right before he tips his head and looks at the elder woman out of the corner of his eye. He's checking to see if she's having that amusement at his expense but when it seems she is asking the question in all earnestness he turns his head. "Life makes us old." And again, asking, "Doesn't it?" Because he's not old enough not to feel wet behind the ears still. "I'd argue that I've had a wife already to settle me down and she was beyond my ability to ... handle. If there was a woman better matched, I would entertain the idea, but the girls are wild and I am too soft to school them." There's no little disapointment in his tone that he can't be one of those heavy handed men to bring a girl up short and make her accept the role of wife and mother. "Wild, yes. That is a fine way of putting it. And the ones that aren't are... unsuitable." Shimana sighs, offering, "Perhaps Rilka, but-- no. I don't think she'd suit. It'd be so nice if it /did/, she's such a dear girl, but." Her head shakes, and her gaze settles on the horizon again. "Perhaps an alternative. How would you feel about mentoring one of the young ones? Katran's little boy is coming on his seventh year, and you know how he hasn't got a father in his life. She's too old for you, but /he/ is old enough to have some training?" There's a small laugh about Rilka and he grins at Shimana, "I think that Rilka would rip me to shreds. You wouldn't do that to me would you?" Celadion can't help but hold that expression of amusement at the thought though, as unsettling as it might be. "Mentoring?" Settling, he digs a toe against one of the sprigs of green coming up through the rocks, "That might be a solution. Hard to grow into a man without a father around." The young man uncurls his arms from his legs at last, "I can do that." "Now, now! She's a sweet girl!" But Shimana lets a little titter of laughter escape too, despite herself. "And she really could use some companionship. But-- no. Anile could certainly use someone to pay a bit of attention. He's a good boy, but I worry for him. Katran really hasn't time, and-- well. Don't feel obligated, now." She pats Celadion's knee, still smiling gently. "I think it would be good for you. Both of you. You're a level-headed young man, and I'd like to see you pass that on. I can run it by Katran, if you'd like? If you want some time to think, that's alright too." "I think she will need to select her companionship. Else Rilka would straight ignore the man she's married to." Celadion adds in an appologetic tone, "I hardly think she has kind feelings for me anyway." The young man grins at being called level headed but only the little snort contests the opinion, he's young still and as such he has his moments. "Please do talk with Katran about it. I think I can get fun and work balanced in, it's no obligation. Anile you say? Did his father pass on recently?" Trying to connect the name with the face. "Ah, you might not-- I forget, you're so young. He was older, do you remember? Jenilin? He had that bad luck on the fishing run about, oh-- four turns out? Left poor Katran alone with the boy. Terrible business." Tongue clucking, she shakes her head. "Poor Katran. In any case, I'll speak to her. I'm sure she'll be delighted - she was mentioning over tea the other day how much she wished Anile could have grown up with a father, but she's so disinclined to remarry, and she's really too hold for more children, so--" "I'm older than many, twenty and four harvets." Celadion notes with more amusement and little heat behind the words. "But yes, I am still green as a reed as father reminds me." FOr the news of Anile's father he crinkles his nose but nods, "I think I remember that, although his name isn't familiar to me. Bad news for those left behind." He makes a sort of sign that's typical for the fisher-folks when hoping for a good catch, for luck. "Anyway, I should get back to the settlement, I told mother I'd help her put out dinner for the elders. You're invited of course. And remember the best quality of green-reeds. Flexible." With a wink he gets to his feet, "Thank you for listening." He makes ready to head back down the cliffside. Shimana remains seated, though she smiles up at Celadion as he rises. "Yes, you're quite the young man, at that. Enjoy being young while you can; youth is wasted on you youngsters, you know. Still." Hands fold back into her lap, and her gaze darts out, helplessly, towards the horizon. "Thank you for the invitation; I've a few more things to do up here, but I'll be down before the sun sets. I'll see you then, I'm sure. And if you see that lazy daughter of mine, please let her know that if she hasn't finished with the seaweed, I'm going to tan her hide." Celadion grins over his shoulder, "I will put on my best stern face and deliver the message." For her daughter of course. With that and a respectful bow of his head he makes his departure, his steps a bit lighter than they were when climbing up from the caves. |
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