Logs:Breakdown
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| RL Date: 25 April, 2015 |
| Who: Quinlys, Telavi |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: Quinlys fucked up, and now she's paying for it. |
| Where: Weyrlingmaster's Office, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 18, Month 8, Turn 37 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: Edyis/Mentions, J'vain/Mentions, Keysi/Mentions, R'van/Mentions |
| OOC Notes: Immediately follows Interrogations and Implications??. |
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| Quinlys hasn't bothered with a glass; she drinks straight from the bottle, long and sure, the kind of drink that really ought to leave her spluttering as it burns its way down. She turns, then, to offer the bottle towards her assistant. "How the fuck does one get from 'it's good to have useful skills for the weyr' to 'but we need to balance that so we're not like Rone?'" Her tone is accusatory. "She thinks she knows everything, that one." Telavi takes the bottle immediately, but it's after Quinlys' outburst that she drinks. On the far end, "What? Keysi? And Rone?" That crease to her forehead isn't 'pretty.' "Edyis," explains Quinlys after a beat, turning to pace the room, all agitated energy. "Though I don't know what Keysi's problem was, either. I agreed with her. But it was like jumping from... 'oh there's a pimple on my nose' to 'my face is going to fall off!' And then the way she looked at me. Sh thinks too damn much of herself." Tela hops up to sit on the table, rather than on a boring old chair, so her feet can swing; "...Edyis again?" she hazards. "What happened? I mean, how did it start?" Like a good pit stop crew, she has the bottle ready for when Quinlys passes by. A nod confirms it: Edyis. Quinlys accepts the bottle, drinking from it as she continues to pace; once, and then a second time before she's ready to explain further. "We were talking about crafts-- about how it was possible to take them up again, as riders. Keysi asked if I supported the idea, and I said I did: that it was a good thing, for people to have additional skills to offer the Weyr. R'van was sarcastic about it, and then Edyis jumped in and made it out like I thought the Weyr would use people like Rone did. Like there was some tiny, fine line between the two concepts." She spits the words out, pausing to drink again before offering the bottle-- somewhat reluctantly-- back to her assistant. Telavi's nodding, nodding, with a bit of a crinkle of her nose for R'van; "Bleh," she says eloquently before taking a sip, which she swishes through her teeth in thought a couple times before actually swallowing. "And she actually said Rone? I thought Rone was more 'burn everyone's fields and try to take over' guy." "She said Rone," confirms Quinlys, making a face. She pauses, now, grabbing the back of one of the chairs with both hands as if to steady herself. She breathes, now, taking in deep lungfuls: one, two, a third. "Rone was... yeah. An opportunist. Not that it matters. I may not big the biggest fan of our leaders, but I don't think they're using us, and that implication... it makes me angry. We all serve. It's... it's a matter of loyalty, and I'm tired of mine being questioned." Tela keeps her blue-today gaze on the bluerider's face; "Ugh, yes." Her fingers curl about the bottle. "I get that she doesn't like Rone, nobody does, her family's hold was in Nabol... but of course you're loyal to the High Reaches, and how could she imply otherwise. Riders who craft, they're going to do it because they like it or at least they like it more than-- do any of ours get out of sweeps and things for that?" "Not most of them," is Quinlys' prompt answer, which comes with a shake of her head. "It just... I didn't like the implications. And I don't like how... I fucked up, Telavi. I was too outspoken, and I caused problems, and I get it: I fucked up. I was angry." She looks exhausted, now; her shoulders have slumped. "And now it feels like they judge everything I say and turn it around, even when I agree with them. Like they have some moral superiority to me. I'm trying to teach and half the time they don't want to listen." Telavi may be briefly distracted, but any contemplation of Savannah being the Nosycraft will have to wait; she listens, blue eyes brimming with empathy until--"Oh, Quinlys," and she hops off to go and offer the other woman a hug for that exhaustion, that everything. "They should respect you. Edyis, she-- I hope she doesn't work on the rest of them." Quinlys leans in to that hug, eyes squeezed close as she attempts to regulate her breathing and pull herself back together; the alcohol clearly hasn't helped this, but maybe it was needed, ever part of it. When she does speak again, it's as she pulls away, her voice quieter, now. "Edyis-- I don't think she even understood why it upset me so much. How it came across. But it was Keysi who-- Keysi and R'van don't seem to respect me at all. I don't know. Maybe I'm too sensitive. I think I need the evening off. I'd better call in J'vain." Tela's there for her, and when she's done takes a half-step back, running her hands over her braided hair. "That's a good idea," she says of J'vain. "Does R'van respect anyone? And of course he would get a bronze. There's always wearing him out... and essays for Edyis. But I'm sorry it's so hard, Q. I wish--" Quinlys' shoulders are drawn back, sharply, as Telavi speaks; she's resolved, now, as much as she is resigned. "Edyis thinks too much of her own opinion; we'll need to work on that. R'van-- no, I imagine he doesn't. We'll work on that, too. It-- it's okay, Telavi." She turns her gaze back on the greenrider, now, attempting a smile. "I wish it were different. But I have to earn that respect back, because it doesn't work, otherwise. And then I lose my job, and I love my job, Telavi. I won't let this stop me." Her pause is brief. Then: "Thank you." Tela's answering smile is just a little tremulous-- but relieved, too, for that resolve. "Nobody's ever accused you of not going for a challenge." Quinlys aims for blithe; misses, in the end, but still. "I eat challenges for breakfast," she says. "I'd better go find J'vain. I'll see you tomorrow?" "Of course." Telavi sets the bottle down on the table in easy reach, though if it's still there when Quinlys is gone, she'll stash it back again. Either way, there are things to think. Many things. Too many things? |
Comments
R'van (12:27, 26 April 2015 (EDT)) said...
dun dun DUN :D
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