Logs:Framing
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| RL Date: 17 June, 2015 |
| Who: Edyis, Faryn |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: Edyis catches Faryn napping and they end up discussing life, contextually. |
| Where: Records Room, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 9, Month 1, Turn 38 (Interval 10) |
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>---< Records Room, High Reaches Weyr(#367RJs) >-----------------------------<
Books. Scrolls. Bound hides. Maps. If it's a record pertaining to the
Weyr, it's likely to be in this roughly oval room with its
floor-to-ceiling cherrywood shelves, its multitude of slots for scrolls,
and its wide drawers for materials that shouldn't be rolled up or folded.
A scribe is usually on duty at the tall desk up front with its good view
of the room, and is able to help visitors find what they're looking for
via the big bound index on its rotating stand. Past the desk, several
tables stand in neat rows for note-taking, each stocked with glowbaskets,
scrap hide, paper and pencils. Additional lighting is provided by a
many-armed wrought-iron light fixture, its glows gleaming through
luxurious glass containers in fluted shapes instead of baskets.
To one side of the room, a gap between two sets of shelves outlines where
another set once stood, now replaced by a tapestry-covered aperture.
Peeking behind the tapestry reveals another cavern, this one likewise full
of shelves, but occupied by only a few boxes of older records and a
somewhat musty air of disuse. As well, two narrow but solid doors are
locked when the room is unattended and a discreet staircase provides
direct access from the Weyrleaders' weyrs. It's a cold, logy sort of afternoon, and the whistle of the wind is so shrill and insistent it still cuts the silence and comfort of the records room with sound and chill. The on-duty scribe is dutifully sleeping on a stack of hides, which leaves anyone who is attending to nefarious purposes alone and unsupervised, but so far it is only Faryn here, a smattering of books marked distinctly as belonging to or containing content from the Beastcraft - and hides on the desk in front of her and a pencil in hand. Her glow-basket is half-shuttered, leaving the lighting at her particular table dim, and maybe that attributes to why she's laid her head in the crook of one arm, her face close to the page she's working on. Edyis grins at the scribe on duty as she enters by way of the bowl, a stack of volumes dedicated to thread fall charting tucked under one arm, which are deposited under the sleeping scribe's nose. Her purpose fulfilled dark eyes rest unexpectedly on the beast crafter, a low whistle. "I have to admit I'm curious as to why you would work in such dim lighting." Pulling a chair up opposite and resting her chin across folded arms. The answer may be readily apparent, because when Faryn rolls her eyes to the sound of the whistle, they're half-open in the manner of toddlers who battle sleep to the last. Or, in this case, "Because I was hoping to nap in the middle," she says, yawning on the word nap and straightening. She stretches her arms in front of her, leaning forward and lengthening her spine until it pops. A twist of the neck for a few more - crackcrackcrack - and the herder leans back in her own chair to slouch down and eye Edyis. "I was working estimations until my eyes got tired," she says with a smile. "Winter should be for hibernating." Edyis chuckles, tilting her head. "Not the best place to nap, some of the apprentices have been known to leave ink mustaches on the unsuspecting." She scans the volumes briefly before tilting her head. "I almost envy you. Except that your doing calculations. So how have you been, feels like forever since we had a chance to talk." "I know," Faryn says, her look going darker. "But I've been known to take the hands from people who put things near my face without my permission. Things balance out." She shrugs a little, looking at her pages. "They're not fun, but they're easy enough. Numbers are truthful and they don't do things you wouldn't expect, at least, usually they don't. I've done a lot of math, lately." She gives Ed a fast smile, easy even. "I've only been back since Turnover, so...kind of forever, yes. I'm good. I've been good." Her tone is something that's a little awed, but satisfied in it. "Are you? Good, that is. And Akluseth?" Edyis snickers at the mention of losing limbs. "You aren't a fan of the unexpected I take it?" She murmurs tilting her head. "Where did you go?" Curious, and at the mention of her lifemate she shrugs, "He is Akluseth." Faryn's mouth purses a little, thoughtfully. "I'm...getting used to it," she finally decides, with a quiet scoff. "I think I just prefer when I don't feel like the unexpected is trying to do terrible things to me. Or, when I can sort of anticipate it? But then, I guess that removes the unexpected part of it, doesn't it? It has degrees. I'd like them lower." As for that curiosity, Faryn seems to evaluate what she's going to say - or maybe if - before she finally does. "Tillek, with my family. And, Ista, with my mum, mostly in the bar, for a seven or so. And...a minor hold outside of Benden." A brow lifts at the explanation, dark eyes studying Faryn all the more intently. "So what is the unexpected thing that is attempting to do unspeakable things?" Her tone light but concerned. She smiles then, "I think I'd give a small fortune to be able to visit Ista or Benden these days. Once we get cleared for between, it's time to stock the liquor cabinet in my weyr. How is your mom, she's a brownrider isn't she?" A noncommital "meh" from the herder, who waves off the dramatics a bit. "Nothing. Everything. It's nature, and life, and things always just seem unfair and hard, don't they?" It's her turn to study Edyis, brows raised with inquiry. Her smile lacks some warmth, but only at the topic. "Ista is warm and sandy and pretty to look at. And my mum is drunk, and bitter, and older than I remember. But, yes, still a brownrider." A wry smile for that, a tilt of the head. "These browns and their girls. I'm sorry I didn't bring anything back. I was bounced around so quickly, I don't think gifts really crossed my mind. To think, you're all so deprived." Edyis snorts, "Never tried to think of life as fair before. Seems a moot point." Still talk of her mother earns a sigh from Edyis. "Sorry you had to put up with that, but at least you got to enjoy the beach. Don't worry about it, I am fairly sure it hasn't crossed anyone's mind." The gifts bit she must mean, and it's the last that has the scribe silent and pensive. "I'm sorry I know... not impressing can be rough sometimes. Dealing with a baby dragon does not a good friend make either, but I do have some Monacoan rum that I'd be willing to share to make up for it?" The edge of her mouth quirking up just a bit. "If not fair, then at least weighed in my favor," Faryn is willing to amend with an amicable grin. "Easy to navigate, easy to estimate, like numbers. Took twenty-two turns to figure it wasn't revolving around me anymore. Those are the sorts of crises you're supposed to have when you're forty." But Edyis' response? That has Faryn making a surprised sound in her throat and sitting abruptly straighter, to lean forward with her arms on the table. "No. Don't take it like that," she says insistently, a hair's short of demanding. "I didn't mean...I had to get over that. I am over it. It took months and months, and trips everywhere but here, just so it wasn't...dangling in front of me, all the time. But I mean it when I say I'm truly over it. I'm not the only one who didn't Impress, and it wasn't the end of the world, and frankly, I shouldn't have acted like it was. It's just illuminating, I guess, when you think you know, who you are and where you are and whether you're happy, and it turns out you're not, or at least not as much as you thought. I probably owe you all an apology." A thoughtful, rueful smile touches her lips. "Too bad you're all in weyrs now. Maybe Quinlys would have let me apologize in public, to the group, in the barracks." "Gambler friend of mine once told me you have to make your own odds," But. It's Faryn's sudden demands that have her smiling, "No one blames you, so far as I know. And trust me, I understand how hard it is to deal with having the things you want, but will never have dangled in front of you." She smiles sad and knowingly at the rest. "Not deliberately, I know. And yet, there you all were. Your dragons growing up. Going to your lessons. Eating my damn beasts." The possessive is fond, the statement not as accusatory as it is amused. "Existing. I do owe you an apology. Even if I covered it well, I resented you. It didn't make me good to be around. Not," she adds, "that the party rides my coattails everywhere." Edyis chuckles a little, "Yeah, Akluseth says they are delicious." Edyis seems prepared to dodge a punch with that, grinning. "Everyone has their own shit to deal with, but the apology is appreciated. Though highly unnecessary, at least in my case." She exhales softly then, "And it's harder than it looks too for what it's worth. Lessons, dealing with someone else in her head, then there's stripping away everything you were before." She shakes her head, "Then again I think most people have an easier time of it that what I ended up having." She lifts a shoulder in a shrug. No punches, just an eyeroll that should probably hurt, it's so dramatic. A small shrug for the necessity of the apology, and it's her turn for her expression to cloud a little, her brows knitting together when she frowns. "You were struggling when I left. I guess I'd hoped it passed, that things would get better as he got older.... Haven't they?" Edyis laughs at the eye roll, pulling a flask from the satchel she usually carries. "I suppose that depends on the definition of better," uncorking it and offering it over before taking a long pull from it. He isn't so much the problem anymore as much as it's me." She admits ruefully. Faryn gives the flask a wary eye, waving it off politely, more interested in the conversation. "Hm. I had assumed you'd be fine, Impressing. You're very capable, very clever, very observant. Where's the trouble?" Edyis laughs darkly. "That's just the problem. I wasn't interested in changing into something or someone else." She sighs, "In gaining Akluseth I lost the life I had built for myself." There's a nonchalant shrug. "Now it's trying to fit into the mold they are putting us into." Faryn chews her lower lip in consideration of that. "I'm not the foremost expert on how to deal with your emotions and big life changes," har har, "and if I'm wrong, tell me so. But I don't think you're supposed to --" She clips the sentence abruptly to rephrase it. "You knew life would change, Ed. Just maybe not how much? If your problem isn't with Akluseth anymore, then maybe it's just a matter of learning the things you aren't." Her smile is wry, then. "Patience, for one. Temperance, for another. Who you are is based on how you're framed, always. You'll get some of your independence back, and maybe then you'll recognize yourself again." Edyis :laughs a little, "When did you become the advocate of temperance?" Tilting her head. "Easily said, the doing part is painful, irritating and usually has everyone and their neighbor telling you precisely what your problem is." She snorts, but there is humor in it at least. "What about you Faryn, do you think you know who you are or who you want to be... or are you still trying to figure that part out?" "Being around my mum always makes me an advocate of moderation, in most things," Faryn says, serious and a little sad. "She's my friendly, annual reminder to step lightly around my vices." Her cheeks and ears color a little, and she murmurs another quick apology to Edyis. "They - we - just want to help. Being on the outside, sometimes you see what the people inside don't. But I'm sure it doesn't feel that way." The looking glass turned back on her, Faryn shrugs. "I'm closer to it. I'm this," a gesture to the hides and logs, "for now. But maybe not much longer." Edyis chuckles, "I didn't mean you Faryn. Though by all means feel free to throw in everyone else does." Propping her chin in her hand, grinning. "Ah, that is appropriately vague and mysterious. A new profession lined up then?" "I don't want to be everyone else. What good is advice if it's lumped on top of everyone else's and piss-poor to boot? You'll figure it out. Like I said, you're smart. Definitely smart enough to figure out how you fit into this life with that dragon of yours." Whether or not she's trying to be mysterious, Faryn's smile is unfathomable. "Not exactly. Call it an idea and a desire." "See now it was that kind of thinking that got me into this mess. Be careful what you wish for and whatnot." But that smile and that mysterious answer earns another chuckle. "A desire for what?" "Mess? Really?" Faryn's taken some issue with the verbiage, it seems, her head tilting off to the side and her frown annoyed. It also seems an appropriate she can attach to, in order to avoid answering the question she's been posed. "It's not really all that bad, is it? A mess? Not just a struggle, oran ordeal, or annoying, but a mess?" Edyis tilts her head, "You shovel dragon dung for six months and try to find a more appropriate descriptor." She exhales, chuckling, "A mess, what happens when nothing goes correctly, or you deal with several embarrassing and humiliating incidents in a row." But for the negative content of the words Edyis seems to be in a surprisingly good mood. "But really if you don't want to tell me you could have just said so." Faryn laughs aloud at that, a sharp bark that's loud enough in the whistling silence to make the sleeping scribe a distance away snort and jerk briefly awake. He settles back as Faryn says, "Shovel shit for almost a decade, then we'll talk. But I still think it's all how you look at it. I love those horses considerably less than I imagine you love Akluseth, and it didn't think it was a mess." A small grimace. "That didn't come until way later." She's caught in the act, however, and her chuckle is conciliatory. "Fine, fine. I just spent my time in Benden not shoveling shit. I figure I don't want to go back to it. And," she adds, almost chagrined, "I want to stay here. I don't trust the hall not to transfer me before Niahvth or Roszadyth rise." Edyis arches a brow at that, "Just what were you doing in Benden?" She tilts her head looking to those books, "That suddenly you are ready to abandon the craft completely?" Since that must be what is happening if she chooses to ignore Hall directives. Leaning in as though to suss out an answer in amusement. "You intend to stand again then?" At last, Faryn seems done with playing cat-and-mouse. "I was filling in for the steward at one of the holdings," she says, plain. "It's not so sudden. I was on the brink of it when they finally granted me leave, wasn't I? It was making me miserable. All of it." A wave, to encompass all of it, whatever that entails, overt or otherwise. "So yes, I'm ready to leave. And yes, I intend to Stand again, if I'm able. And if that fails, I'll plan again." A squint at Edyis. "Do you regret it now? Continuing to try?" Edyis laughs, "Seems an odd job to pick up at random, but if you've found work that makes you happy." The last question has her frowning, "I regretted it from the instant he stumbled in front of me." She admits honestly, "Don't get me wrong, Akluseth if anything were to happen that would be the end. But I regret the life I gave up before I regret not being satisfied with it. I can never be that person again. But, who knows? Maybe me and seaweed brain will find where we fit and some place that makes us happier?" "That's what I thought," Faryn says of the job, shaking her head. "R'hin has this, I don't know what. It was three days' ride to Benden by runner and he left me there for two sevens before he even showed face to make sure I was still doing okay." "But it surprised me by not making me miserable. And it means that I have options outside of the hall, things I just...couldn't see. I don't think to be the Headwoman or Steward anywhere, just. Options." She frowns gently at Edyis. "I'm sorry for that. But you would have changed, eventually, anyways. Like I said. It's how you frame yourself. You're not even the same person you were a few weeks ago, and you won't be the person you are now ever again. Inevitable." She reaches out then, for her pencil, her hides, and gives a perfunctory look at the tables she's written. "I think that's all can really do. Hope we'll be happy most of the time. You'll figure it out. Like I said. You're clever." Surprise melts into something unreadable. After several minutes of stunned silence, she bursts in to giggles. "Not that I buy the frame bull mind you, nice sentiment but honestly it's never the frame that makes the picture." Breathy and between giggles. "You are so doomed." The former scribe seems to decide as she stands then. Faryn's eyebrow raises bemusedly, her smile soft at the edges. "No, but it can make a big difference, sometimes. I imagine a giant brown dragon might make a change to a serene landscape, if it's a good one." She tucks most of her papers into a book, but pulls a blank sheet closer while she flips open another log. "Probably," she agrees, tucking some of her papers away as Edyis stands. "But it beats stagnating." Edyis just giggles as though at some private joke. "Serene and Akluseth never belong in the same sentence for one." She grins, but whatever had her laughing before still has her amused now. "I wish you all the best Faryn. May you be stranded in only interesting places." Whatever that means as the former scribe makes her way out. |
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