Logs:Many Happy Returns 2
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| RL Date: 12 August, 2009 |
| Who: N'thei |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Vignette |
| When: Day 14, Month 6, Turn 20 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: Satiet/Mentions, F'rint/Mentions, A'son/Mentions, Amerie/Mentions |
| N'thei woke, as he normally did, some time in the early afternoon. Dawnsweeps were still his thing, still something he did daily, but they'd stopped being some masochistic measure-- he couldn't have pinpointed when, but they'd gone from punishment to routine in the past months. In front of his mirror, splashing water on his face, he caught his own eyes for a second and realized, with a momentary pang, why he felt out of sorts on this particular day. For a moment, he stood still, his razor dipped in the surface of the water, his eyes lowered from the mirror to the submerged silvery edge. There'd been times, he reflected, when that blade looked so friendly, when the days stretched out bleakly before him, void of ambition, desire, warmth. He remembered mornings when he got no further than scrubbing his face before his arms would shake on the edge of his wash basin, before tears would spill, before he felt robbed and impotent to do anything about it. Always, when he could summon the energy to do nothing more than sink to the floor and surround himself in what felt like endless apathy, painful malaise, always there would be a nudge, a reminder, gunsmoke and dust and blinding heat. Now-- life was still life. He could feel wisps of joy now and then, he could get angry without getting murderous, find reasons to get out of bed, even if they weren't always the most compelling reasons. He'd amassed a small fortune in the last year, though he really had no particular use for it, aside from that he liked to know it was there. He kind of liked working for F'rint instead of the other way around, found him to be a pretty pleasant guy, and it was sort of nice to be a right-hand-man instead of the go-to-guy. He didn't much care of 99% of the population, but that really wasn't anything new. He liked seeing Amerie again. He kept thinking he'd have to go and talk to A'son some time, shake hands instead of punch him in the head, but there was something off-balance in that old friendship, and he wasn't sure how to put it back in line. Eventually. He liked shaving sometimes, not everyday, but it could be all right every couple of days. Lather, edge of blade, chin lifted. He was going to love her until he died. But he was going to live without her. |
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