Logs:Significant
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| RL Date: 18 May, 2014 |
| Who: G'laer, Oliwer |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: G'laer wants to take another step. |
| Where: Oliwer's Room, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 1, Month 11, Turn 34 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: Baera/Mentions, Laghnei/Mentions |
| OOC Notes: Almost not back-dated. |
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| It's not that Oliwer and G'laer go out of their way to keep their relationship a secret, but by nature they are extremely discreet. Neither is interested in public displays of affection. G'laer doesn't take many meals in the Living Cavern and when he does, he's most often dining with his wing. Most likely the reason they often spend nights at G'laer's is for the privacy of it, but they can, from time to time, be seen either together or separately in the same evening heading into Oliwer's quarters in the craft complex. Tonight is one such night and G'laer is comfortably reclining in the healer's bed, sheets tangled around him and hands behind his head. His expression is deeply pensive and he's been silent some time, lost in his own thoughts. Oliwer's quarters aren't very large overall, but the bed, at least, is something he's thought to replace for one somewhat bigger than what it originally came with. It makes lounging with someone else in his bed considerably more pleasant. He's never been one to be overly bothered by prolonged silences, but eventually even he has to tease, "You're going to give yourself an aneurysm if you get to thinking any harder, Gal." He doesn't, however, actually ask what's on the greenrider's mind, just leans in closer to kiss his chest and glance up at him curiously. G'laer has never needed appropriate conversational openings to say anything he has a mind to, so it's not that Oliwer's teasing gives him that so much as pulls him from thinking to acting. He tilts his chin down, brow furrowed. "I want you to meet my sister." That he has ten of them is known, but only one is mentioned with any kind of frequency. So that he means 'Reaches bluerider Laghnei is a fair, educated guess. If Oliwer ever had any idea what G'laer might say from one moment to the next, he's probably never expected him to say anything like that. The journeyman's brows do their own furrowing while he considers the best way to respond, but it only ends with him shifting to lean up against one of his arms and asking, "Why would you want me to meet your sister? I mean, I'm rather certain I've met her in the infirmary once or twice." G'laer's lips purse slightly and he maneuvers his nearest arm to try to encircle Oli's torso and pull him against him. "Not as my-" What are they exactly? "-something, you haven't." He moves his other hand to stroke the nearest bit of healer it can find. "Please?" He almost never says please. It's not that he's rude, far from it, he just doesn't often meddle with magic words. "Your something, hmm?" That definitely makes Oliwer smile like it was something entirely more romantic, and probably helps him with the sinking back against G'laer when the greenrider reaches out for him. "You might want to figure out what to tell her--" But that makes him consider another question before he can finish the first thought, "Have you told her about us?" Maybe this was really the topic of the deep thinking because now the greenrider frowns. "What do you want to be to me?" Then he has to clarify, "You are something to me. I just don't know what I should call that something. Boyfriend sounds like we're teenagers. Lover sounds like something out of a Harper novel Baera would read," Baera, the laundress sister with her head in the clouds. "Yeah. I told Laghnei." Of course, it's only now that he thinks to ask, "Does that bother you?" "I think if I were to tell my mother about you," which doesn't mean he's planning on it, "I might tell her that you're a very good friend." That makes Oliwer smile for a moment, not an incredibly happy smile, but not sad, either. "I suppose, regardless of how it sounds, lover is rather accurate. Although it does suggest..." Well, a word neither of them have been particularly comfortable using. As for Laghnei, "No, no. Just unexpected." G'laer's frown deepens, in contrast to the older man's smile. "Would you tell her that because that's what I am to you or because she'd be uncomfortable hearing something more?" He wants to know, and, "What does it suggest?" While he's at it. Oliwer considers the question for a moment even if he probably knows his answer already. "That is what you are to me. It's just not all that you are. I don't think my mother would need to know more than that, though. I'm not sure she'd want to know more than that. Besides, I kind of like keeping you to myself." As for the rest, he seems hesitant. "I suppose... well. It suggests a certain," he pauses, searching for the right word and only coming up with, "affection." G'laer's frown deepens, now to the point that it's practically clownish. "Do you lack affection for me?" Oliwer can only stare at G'laer for a moment. Then, "No, of course not. That's not it at all." He draws in a breath to say more, but hesitates again, brows furrowing uncertainly. When he does finally speak, it's a very direct, if slightly flustered, "Do you love me, G'laer?" If Oliwer is flustered, G'laer is speechless. Speechless and sitting up. Not leaving, just sitting up. Maybe he just needs more blood in his head. Although, judging from the color of crimson his cheeks have become, he seems to have plenty of blood there already. He's silent a long time. A long, long time. The longer he's quiet the more troubled his look becomes. Then he's reaching for the healer's hands. "I'm a hard man, Oli. It goes against everything I've become to love someone. Love makes you vulnerable." His fingers squeeze, "If it weren't for her, I wouldn't think it was still possible for me to love." He swallows hard. "I'm-- I care for you. I do. Deeply." But. "But I'm not there yet." Azurite seeks blue-grey, silently beseeching understanding and patience. It's difficult for Oliwer to maintain complete neutrality once he realizes where G'laer is headed. Instead of looking the greenrider in the eye, his gaze falls to their hands and lingers there. It's safer. His head nods before he says anything, a little quick at first, like he totally understands. But then he doesn't say anything for a long few moments to back it up. "Well, then," he says finally, awkwardly and somewhat carefully to keep his voice from betraying very much, "I suppose lovers wouldn't be a very appropriate thing to call ourselves, hmm?" His smile is fleeting but earnest as he draws his hands away. It's always in those moments after one has voiced something that's hurt someone else that the regret is most desperate. How far from the truth would it have been if G'laer had said he did. He's maintained lies before, would it have been so hard? "Oli," His baritone is soft, pained. He doesn't try to keep the hands. At first he doesn't seem to know what to say; who would? It's not like he can say, 'Just kidding, I do love you after all.' The healer would never believe it. "Oli, please." Quiet, but definitely pleading. "I told my sister about you because I'm getting there. There are moments when I feel it, but not every moment, yet. I wouldn't want you to meet her if I didn't feel sure it was -- I was getting there. I'm sorry I'm not there yet. I'm-- I'm so sorry." As he speaks, he's shifting to follow, but not too closely the withdrawal of the healer. "It's fine," says Oliwer in a way that's even sort of convincing. "Really. I shouldn't have asked. It's my fault." That doesn't mean the way he moves to the edge of the bed isn't a little self conscious. He slips on a robe as he rises and only turns back toward the bed once it's tied in place. Even though he's still not quite meeting G'laer's gaze, he doesn't look very upset. Granted, sometimes his objectively neutral mode is just a well-practiced mask. "Don't apologize," he says, voice gently firm, before repeating, "It's fine. And I'm fine meeting your sister. If you still want me to, I mean." Like bringing up this subject might have changed the greenrider's mind. It would be convincing if G'laer didn't have some experience in this area. While Oliwer is moving away, G'laer allows himself a moment of 'freak out' in the form of heavy breathing through the palms over his face. Once Oliwer's off the bed, he's moving after him and into his space, wrapping the shorter man tightly in his arms. "You're important to me. I care about you. I'll give you my heart if you let me, I just can't yet." Now the greenrider isn't looking at him; he's probably afraid of what he might see. And his face? None of the normal neutrality. He's visibly upset. If that's not a testament to his feelings, what is? As for Oliwer's mask and many less than likely words? They're ignored like they were never there. Oliwer is a little surprised, to say the least, by what G'laer says. Not that he doesn't believe it. It's just that the greenrider is saying it at all, more than likely. He shifts in that embrace to wrap his arms up around G'laer's shoulders, leaning up to press a kiss to the younger man's jaw. Without drawing away, he murmurs, "I'm sorry, Gal. I know you care about me. I do. And that's more than enough for me. I promise." Is G'laer clinging a little tightly? Well, can Oli blame him? There was a moment just then when it was possible he was going to have to leave through the door ne'er to return. That's enough to make just about anyone who cares about what they have hold it a little tighter. For the moment, there's only silence and the greenrider's needy hold. Then a long slow exhale. "I'll get there," his murmur is practically a promise. Whether or not it's one he can live up to... well, that's a story that has yet to unfold. Still, in this moment, he's sure. He seeks the healer's lips, and then it will soon be back to the bed with both of them if Oli doesn't put a stop to it. The matter of his sister and meeting her? That'll have to be dealt with later, if it isn't already settled. |
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