Logs:So How Are You Doing Really?
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| RL Date: 30 November, 2009 |
| Who: K'del, Teris |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: K'del spills his guts to Teris. |
| Where: Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 7, Month 5, Turn 21 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: B'tal/Mentions, K'ndro/Mentions, Milani/Mentions, Nakasha/Mentions, Tiriana/Mentions, W'chek/Mentions |
| Snowasis, High Reaches Weyr The Snowasis is rarely quiet, and even then, the high-ceilinged former weyr is kept from echoing by the fantastical booths tucked into its convoluted perimeter. The secluded seating spaces have been shaped from the truncated stalagmites that escaped the smoothing of the main floor, and are both softened and separated by colorful hangings that are thick and opaque enough to make each corner its own private nook. Some of the smaller stalactites still roam the ceiling, their jagged teeth tracing a bumpy, inverted spine to the hearth. There, a thick rug with a low klah table and comfortable armchairs and couches sit, their upholstery and cushions changed sporadically to match the season: bright, light colors in the summer, fresh greens and yellows in the spring, warm autumnals in fall, and clear, rich hues for winter. Small tables litter the rest of the cavern, enough to fit up to four people each, while stools stand along the smooth wooden bar behind which is the passthrough window to the kitchen. Glass-paneled cabinetry behind the bar provides a clear view of the available liquors, the many colors reflecting the soft light of glows tucked into strategic niches around the cavern. It's a rare thing, at the moment, for K'del to be out and about around the weyr - hiding in one's weyr is the latest fashion, really. Despite this, on a cool, damp-but-not-actually-rainy afternoon, the Weyrleader can in fact be seen, angling his way into the Snowasis with his hands jammed in his pockets and his head held defiantly high. He makes his way towards the bar, making his order - "Whiskey, neat," - in a calm, clear tone, then turns his head about to consider the bar as a whole, the people within it. One of those people in the bar is Teris. She's taking up a booth all to herself and eating a late lunch or an early dinner while she considers a piece of paper. One that she apparently would rather not be considering because her attention strays away as she sets it down with a sigh. A quick glance toward the bar has her attention focusing instead on K'del and she looks thoughtful as she makes a gesture for him when she thinks he might notice it. K'del does notice, though his gaze strains to correctly place the giver of the gesture. As his drink is slid across the top of the bar towards him, he seems to have worked it out because, after flicking some small denomination marks towards the barkeep, he launches off in Teris' direction. "Thought it was you," he declares, in lieu of greeting as he gets close enough, seating himself on the opposite bench of the booth without any further comment, except, "Working lunch?" "And yet you still came," Teris returns, a little amused as she watches him sit down and she takes a small bite of her light meal; some flaky fish and veggies. "They all sort of seem to be," she says in another moment or two. "Probably don't need to be. But it's nice to stay busy. Do something. Besides, the people aren't really worth watching today." The last said with glance to the rest of the bar's patrons. "I'm a little surprised to see you out here. I've heard rumors that you were hiding somewhere outside of the Weyr entirely." Which earns a smile. "Mind, I also heard that the Weyrwoman had you beaten, so I guess you can't really trust rumors since you seem well enough." "You," K'del lifts his hand, gestures with it, "At me. Figured you weren't likely to be doing so to beat me-- wait. Unless she's offloaded that task on you, as well?" His brows raise with the suggestion, but he can't be too serious, not with that twitch of a smile lingering about the corners of his mouth. "Tend to work through my lunches, too. And dinners, sometimes, if I don't have people around to drag me away... anyway. Rumours of my departure and death by Weyrwoman are, thus far, exaggerated. As you see." "Right," Teris says, nodding at the gesture. She did that. "Do you always come when a girl wants you to?" She smiles, glances back down at her food and takes another bite before she decides that she's done with it and pushes it toward the edge of the table for some passing server to take when they get a chance. "I think if she wanted you beaten, she'd be more likely to send my father or something." She seems to be joking, poor taste or not. The blonde glances again at her paper, then at K'del, "So how are you doing, really?" K'del twists his glass around, then lifts it towards his mouth for a sip. "No," is his answer, eventually, after he's swallowed. "But it didn't look as though you were likely to scowl at me, and I can use that at the moment." Rueful smile. Continuing, he adds, "Anyway, you've got a point. Though... reckon she'd rather do it herself. She's got a mean hook on her." Her joke only makes his lips twitch again, the smile not really reaching his eyes. "Been better? But." He shrugs. "Does it matter? All out of my hands at the moment; gotta see what happens." "You need to stop letting people get to you," is Teris' helpful, unsolicited advice. "You shouldn't be worrying about who is and isn't going to scowl at you anyway. You're the Weyrleader and it's not your job to be liked. I mean... look at Tiriana." She doesn't sound as though she expects him to really respond to any of that and she continues, "Any idea what /will/ happen?" One of K'del's eyebrows begins to a slow and dubious journey upwards. Calmly, his response is kept to a low tone; "You met many people who /respect/ me, either, Teris?" His point, presumably, is something along the lines of 'no one likes /or/ respects me, and likes is easier'. Though he obviously needed to reply to that, he doesn't waste any time in adding, "Probably, they'll decide that it would be disrespectful of us to dig up this graveyard, and thus they'll respectfully request us to agree to cancel the deal, probably in exchange for something Crom offers. Dunno." "Maybe if you stopped trying to get everyone to like you, it would be easier for you to demand respect." Teris' response is also calm and low, almost pleasant. The rest helps distract her from these matters of respect and K'del to focus on the matters of the Weyr and Crom. "It seems so... ugh. I mean, I don't want to be buried when I die. I can't imagine burying someone. Maybe we can just gather up all the bones and take then between." Pause. "I guess it depends on what they might give us whether or not I'd just tell them to shove their bones up their-- I mean, you'd think they'd want us to succeed in not needing so much from other people." K'del's expression is hard to define exactly, given Teris' remark on respect; in the end, he doesn't respond to it at all, instead giving most of his attention to his glass as the blonde continues. Eventually; "It's funny... everyone in my family has always been buried, but now? No way I'd want to be. Must seem really strange, from a weyr point of view, all of this fuss over some bones." Beat. "You'd think, wouldn't you? Beginning to wonder whether Crom intended all of this. Browden, at least, may have. Eb-- someone suggested they might even have been planted. And then there's the possibility that someone within the weyr is colluding with them." He rubs at his brow, head shaking. Teris is probably kind of use to the hard to define expressions and she doesn't give it a whole lot of thought. "It is strange," she agrees, but her tone is thoughtful because she's thinking about the rest with a small frown. "Strange especially if it would keep them from using the land, too. I'd be curious to see what they did with it if you actually canceled the deal with them, whether or not they left the bones there. If they were planted, they couldn't expect you not to check back. Anyway, wouldn't there be some sign?" Not that she wants to defend the holders, it's just a point of thought. "Maybe," allows K'del, around the rim of his glass. He sets the drink down again, folding his hands around it as he considers, gaze shifting back towards Teris. "Don't know enough about what these things should look like. Ground got all muddy, too, and I guess that changed it a bit." He lets out a long, low breath, then adds, "Guess we'll just have to wait and see, right? Keep a look out. Bet they'll justify anything they do do somehow, though, you know? Kind of what they do. Get you into a situation where..." He waves a hand vaguely to fill in the rest of that; he looks moody and unhappy. "That does seem to be how the world works," Teris agrees, returning K'del's look as she searches his face casually. "Men justifying everything they do and trying to bully other people into thinking they're right about it. Makes me wonder what Browden's wife thinks about everything." Which makes her smile. "He has a wife, doesn't he? She's not one of those supposed piles of bones?" Her lips purse for a moment as she leans back and crosses her arms. "Anyway, I don't know why Browden deserves all this consideration. Is he Crom's lover or something?" Leave it to a weyrbred girl to think it. "You need another drink?" asked with something almost like concern. For a moment, K'del looks tempted by this prospect of another drink, but ultimately, he shakes his head. "Really shouldn't," he tells Teris, though he sounds appreciative nonetheless. Of the rest; "That a pointed comment? The bit about men justifying everything they do. Browden's got a wife, so far as I know. Got a couple of sons, at least... why lover? Why's everything got to come back to that? Could just be they have a deal together. Business. You scratch my back, etc." Teris doesn't respond right away but the way she sits up a little straighter might suggest she's taking a defensive stance and perhaps taking the rest a little personally. "It's just what I know in my experiences. I wasn't meaning you." For the rest she tries to continue sounding perfectly polite. "I was joking, K'del. Maybe you should," she glances at his glass. "Seems like you could use the relaxing. Imagine it's been plenty stressful." Beat. And then; "Sorry," says K'del, apparently genuinely, draining the last of his drink and setting the glass back upon the table. "Didn't mean to be... You know." Another wave of the hand; the hand is apparently supposed to explain everything. He lets out a long breath. "Joking. Right. Yeah. I--" He shakes his head, adding, "Shouldn't even have had this drink. Supposed to relax in the evenings, work during the day. Meetings this afternoon; got to have a clear head." He gives his glass a long glance. "Haven't been sleeping well. Been a bad... well. Just lots going on, even beyond all of this." Offering a smile, Teris gives her head a small shake. "No need to apologize." Though she doesn't offer the same in return. "Maybe I'll just have some sent to your weyr. Whiskey. Or something else to help you sleep since you probably already have your own, hmm. Certain teas can do that, I hear." She considers him, relaxing from her defensive posture somewhat. "And I don't mean to come back to that, but don't you have people that will help you with that sort of thing? What else is going on that's got you so stressed out?" "Tea," repeats K'del, with an expression that might be a grimace, but doesn't quite make it. "Reckon I'll stick to whiskey. And strenuous exercise before bed, though apparently that's not--" he breaks off, makes a face; possibly it's apologetic. "Trouble is, most of the people I'd usually talk to have their own stuff going on. Or my stuff, to some degree. My sister's-- well, won't go there. Milani-- is it weird that I'm all uncomfortable with her being pregnant with someone else's baby, even though we're totally not in a monogamous kind of relationship?" "Tea isn't so bad," Teris says with a grin. She's seen the hints of that expression before, no doubt. "But, you know, I know we're not very close or anything but we could talk. Be part of the friendliness." Smile. "I used to talk to B'tal a lot but these days... the only reason I know he's moved in with that bronzerider is because I helped him find a weyr." The blonde leans forward slightly and if she were someone else, this might be where she'd reach across the table to take his hand. But she doesn't. She just says, "I don't think that's weird at all. I think I'd be uncomfortable with that, too. Any of it, maybe. But, at least, K'ndro seems to be a good man. So there's that." "Tea," says K'del, "is not very manly." But that's with a grin, at least, as though he's probably just joking on this front. "Maybe," he says of talking, hesitating a little more before it, though he looks thoughtful rather than reluctant. "Guess he and W'chek do their talking together? Dunno. Not as though I'm /not/ talking to Millie about stuff, it's just-- too much stuff, maybe." His thought processes seem to be mushing into each other, not quite separating out. "Is he? Barely know him, just... always feel like he thinks I'm an idiot. Which is rich, coming from him." He lets out another low breath. "It's just hard, watching Millie get big with someone else's baby. Always figured it'd be mine." Joke or not it makes Teris laugh and she bows her head in concession to that at the very least. She leaves the subject of her brother without saying much else. See, she's being good. So very, painfully good. Not even a negative word about W'chek there. "Seems to be," she repeats in regards to K'ndro. "I don't know him very well so obviously that doesn't mean a whole lot. But he's very good at pretending to be if he's not." She props up her chin on her palm and glances out toward the rest of the bar again. "You'll still have a chance. If you want that, I mean. But if you're not monogamous, I suppose you sort of had to expect it. Surprised you don't already have a herd of kids of your own what with your reputation." Her gaze comes back to him and she's grinning. Impressively good, really, not that K'del would know it. Then again, he's pretty wrapped up in his own issues anyway. "Maybe it is. Guess... eh. I don't know. Maybe I should actually try and get to know him at some point, but... Eh." He pokes at his glass, pushing it across the table a short distance, then dragging it back with a hooked finger. "Beginning to wonder if I'm actually /able/ to have kids," he admits, then. "Because... right. My reputation? Not exactly undeserved." Despite her grin, he looks as moody and unhappy as ever. "I do want kids. Not that it has to be /now/, but... You know. It's awkward." The blonde doesn't seem to mind that K'del is focused on himself. Just makes things easier. Though she seems to actually be rather engaged in the conversation. K'del is a person. Go figure. Teris watches the glass for a moment then lifts her gaze to his face. "If you guys don't like each other I'm not sure trying will help that much. But it's worth a shot if you think so." The rest could be a rather touchy subject - like all the stuff before now hasn't been - but Teris approaches it in her usual manner. "It wouldn't be the end of the world. I'd be more likely to have sex with you if that were the case." Because that's worthwhile, right? "Maybe you're just meant to have children with someone else at some other time." Ruefully, K'del explains, "K'ndro and I barely know each other. So... it's kind of dumb? But. Sort of feel like maybe we ought to... So. Maybe." This said, his attention rather zeroes in upon Teris - so much for the conversation focusing on /him/, because: "You're that worried about getting pregnant? You know there's ways to be not pregnant again, right? And to avoid it. My sister... rather wishes she knew that earlier, so I get, absolutely, not wanting to be pregnant, but still." Beat. "Maybe I am. Don't know. Just... too many of the women I've slept with, or sleep with still, getting pregnant with other people. Feels strange." Teris might have said something about the dumbness of that but instead, "I know there are ways. But none of them are one hundred percent, are they? I'd be the one that couldn't get rid of it, I'm sure." /Sure/. She leans back again, shifting a little uncomfortably in her seat now. "Your sister is pregnant?" An attempt, perhaps, to get the focus back on the bronzerider. "Maybe you just sleep with too many women. Spreading yourself a little thin. You should cut back." She can't help it but it makes her smile. K'del gives Teris a long, measured look and finally says, "Remind me never to let you and my sister get together. She'd probably do nothing but convince you further that sex is a terrible idea, which is a pity, because I think she was rather enjoying herself up until... well." He shakes his head; he even looks mildly sad - poor Teris, not getting to enjoy herself. "Yeah, eight months along. My baby sister, big as a house. And-- already did cut back, actually. Mostly just down to a couple of regulars. Well. Milani, and the occasional other. So." So there! "I think she sounds lovely," Teris says. "Shame that it took her getting pregnant, though. But if she's anything like you, I'm sure she'll work everything out just fine." That's sort of like a compliment. "How old is she?" She grins at the last, one corner a little higher like she's trying not to grin quite so big. "See, there. Just a matter of time, then. Or, you know, not if you can't actually have them." Pause. "Regulars doesn't sound very good, you know." K'del is so obviously enormously fond of his sister that Teris' comment on her sounding lovely only makes him grin. "Think so. Hope so. Soon as the baby is born, I hope." He's obviously going to take it as a complement. "Seventeen. She's just under a turn and a half younger than me." Making a face at the implication of 'regulars', he does manage to laugh after a moment; "Point taken. My... what, then? What should I call them instead?" Smiling, Teris asks, "Is she keeping it? You're holdbred, right? I didn't think you all did that sort of thing. Get pregnant. Or... oh, is she married? I guess her husband wouldn't really like her never having sex again." The rest earns a small shrug and she shifts more comfortably again. "I don't really know. You're the one fucking them. Just sounds so impersonal or something. So you're still sleeping with Milani even though she's all big with K'ndro's kid. That /would/ be awkward." She can agree on that despite a lack of experience. "Not sure I'm really the sharing type." "Think she'll foster or something, probably. She's not terribly interested in being a mother. She's at Fort Weyr. Won't even say who the father is." Something that K'de, from the looks of it, is not thrilled about. He scrubs at his face as he adds, "My mother's not thrilled, to say the least, but mostly I think she's hurt because Kash doesn't want to talk to her." Tipping his head back up so that he can consider Teris, he laughs. "Maybe it does. Dunno... never really managed the monogamous thing. Never tried, to be honest. But yeah, still sleeping with Milani. It... is awkward." Beat. "No sharing? So you'd want someone all to yourself. /If/ you were going to sleep with anyone." "Oooh. Fort. Right." Teris says it like maybe she should have known that. Obviously it's probably not something she would have, though. "Maybe she's not sure? I don't think I'd want to talk about it a lot, either." Although probably for different reasons. "If I were going to sleep with someone. Maybe. It's how I've imagined things would be. Not that I'd spend the rest of my life with them or anything but, well--" Pause. "Never mind." Explaining; "She was Searched. Didn't stand, in the end, though, because it turned out she was pregnant. That's probably half the problem." He nods hesitantly, to this concept of her not knowing, that he doesn't seem convinced of this. In the end, though, what he says is, "Fair enough, I guess. I mean... it's what most people intend, right? A girlfriend, or /a/ boyfriend. Never mind what?" Even as he asks the question, though, he's drawing himself towards his feet. "Ought to go face that meeting in a minute, though." Him moving to his feet translates to Teris not having to answer his question or continuing on with anymore of that conversation. She almost seems just a little bit relieved. "Aha. That makes more sense. If she comes here, you'll have to introduce us sometime," is all she says on that line of thought. Then, "Enjoy your meeting K'del. Don't forget to bring your balls with you." It's said with a pleasant, perfectly innocent smile. Pity. Bad timing. K'del actually looks disappointed. But not for long, because her comment about his balls makes him laugh. He even reaches down to his crotch to cup said balls and tell her, mock-seriously, "Reckon I've got 'em. Thanks, Teris." Then, drawing his hand away again, he turns and heads away. At least he's apparently in a better mood than he was when he arrived! |
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