Difference between revisions of "Logs:I Want That"

Kitchen, High Reaches Weyr

Polished marble and granite surfaces, gleaming metalwork and pale woods characterize the vaulted fastness of the kitchen. Several large hearths gape red-mouthed against the outer wall of the cavern, their fires almost always stoked for the constant cooking the Weyr requires to feed its denizens. Sinks line the wall to one side of the hearths, providing ample space to wash large quantities of dishes, while to the other, cabinetry and a deep pantry provide storage space for items commonly needed on a day-to-day basis.

The remaining wall space is taken up by passageways and extra seating: swinging doors that lead variously to the main living cavern, the inner caverns and the storage rooms, a counter-height pass-through for food service to the Snowasis, and a series of nooks equipped with tables and benches for quick, out-of-the-way meals any time of day.

It might not be quite dinner time yet but B'tal is wandering into the kitchen, still shrugging out of his snowy flight jacket. That and the rest of the gear he hasn't managed to drop off anywhere else yet gets tossed toward a table while he continues along to find something to /eat/. Cheeks red from the cold, blustery weather outside, the greenrider settles for stew rather than anything more complicated they're working on for dinner. With that, some bread and a mug of cider, he starts making his way back toward the table he claimed with tossed gear.

It's as B'tal starts making his way back to his table that Madilla passes through the swinging doors from the inner caverns. Though she looks moody and thoughtful as she enters, her face positively lights as she catches sight of the greenrider; her pace increases, until, soon after, she reaches the table itself and says, warmly; "B'tal. I keep intending to come and find you to say hello."

The expression that appears on B'tal's face is more akin to wide-eyed 'deer in headlights' than lighting up at first but he manages not to let it linger for long as he sets down his bowl and mug and moves his gear a little out of the way. "Madilla, hey," he says, a smile flickering uncertainly into existence. There's an awkward pause before he says, "You eating? Wanna join me?"

Perhaps Madilla misses 'deer in the headlights'; perhaps she passes it off as something else. Either way, her smile doesn't dim at all, and indeed, she looks all the more pleased as the invitation is issued. "I'd like to," she says, warmly, nodding her head. "Give me a few minutes to get some food, and then I'll be right back." Not waiting for a response, she hurries off to do just this, returning within the few minutes with a bowl of stew and some bread.

B'tal nods, smiles again and watches her go before settling in to take a few bites of his stew. It's warm and he's cold and hungry. Manners aren't exactly at the top of his to-do list. He does pause when Madilla returns, however, watching again for a moment but apparently uncertain what, if anything, he should be saying to her. Then it hits him! "So, uh. How're you doing?"

Madilla looks pleased to have been asked, though it's possible that, at this point, she'd be pleased just about whatever happened-- up to a point, anyway. She settles herself in opposite the greenrider, tearing a piece off of her bread roll before she says, "I'm doing very well, thank you B'tal. W'chek says that you've been well, too, I think?" Her gaze almost borders on appraising as she considers him, carefully.

"Good. That's good," B'tal returns quickly even while he's nodding in response to her question. "I've been okay, yeah. We have. Mostly. I mean, today kind of sucked, but." He doesn't actually finish the thought, instead just shrugging it off as his gaze drops to his stew so he can take another bite. It could be he's just trying to avoid that look she's giving him since his gaze stays on his apparently rather interesting meal.

The avoidance of her look only makes Madilla look all the more intently, though the furrow of her brow seems more confused than concerned. "Today?" A pause, and then, "Oh, because of the weather? It hadn't even really occurred to me, properly, how troublesome the snow could be for you riders, until a few days ago." She dips a piece of bread into her stew, and then adds, "I'm glad you've been well."

"The weather, yeah," is said as B'tal gives his head a little bob. He glances up to continue on with, "It's awful. So of course it's me that gets to sit around on my, uh-- gets to sit around and play watchrider. Can't even see anything. So then we flew straight back." And the greenrider pauses when he realizes that his voice has taken on a slightly ranting quality. His cheeks are still a little red to show any blushing but, well, Madilla probably knows him well enough now to guess as much. "You, too. Glad you're well."

Ranting, blushing, or no, Madilla's expression betrays distinct, genuine sympathy. "That doesn't sound like much fun," she agrees, with a wrinkle of her nose. "Sometimes, I feel cooped up, working inside all the time, but... there are advantages to it." She reaches for her spoon, now, and dips it into the stew, though her head remains slightly tilted to the side, and her gaze on B'tal. "Is everything all right?" she wants to know, finally, never mind what he's already told her.

Since B'tal has already told her what he has, her question seems to confuse him just a little bit. He finishes the bite he was in the process of before there's another head bob. "Yeah." There's a beat where something must click and he continues, "I'm, uh... I'm okay with, you know, what you and W'chek have been talking about. The baby, I mean." That's what he must assume she's questioning further about. "I'm happy for you. Both of you." He even smiles again for a moment, then he's reaching for his cider to take a drink.

It makes Madilla blush, all of this, and finally, her gaze ducks downwards, towards her bowl, and the stew she is eating - though slowly. "I--" she begins, breaking off and shaking her head. "That's not-- but good. I'm glad. Truly. I wouldn't-- if you weren't okay with it, I wouldn't push it." She lifts her head again to note this, seeking out his gaze if she can manage it. "And I hope you know that I - /we/ - want you involved. Part of this baby's life. If you want to be."

Any meeting of her gaze is only brief and for a moment B'tal's eyes look maybe a little bit brighter. But glancing away, he composes himself and clears his throat before offering, "I know. And I... I want that, too. To be involved. No reason I wouldn't be okay with it." The last is offered a little lower, a little earnestly. "I know how much you both want... that." He seems slightly more relaxed, maybe warming up finally, and breaks off a bit of bread to dunk into his stew.

Madilla might well explode with pleasure-- but she's restraining herself to simply smiling. Okay, beaming. Still. It could be worse. "I'm so glad," she tells him, unable to keep the delight and excitement out of her voice. "I just wish-- wish it could be sooner." At least her gaze is less searching, more relaxed, now, not nearly so inclined to stare and stare and stare. Most of the joy has left her tone, though, by the time she adds, "I just wish people were-- happier for me. Us. Did they feel this way when W'chek and I were going to get married, and I just didn't notice?"

Her excitement has an effect on B'tal. It's a little harder for him not to smile for a few moments there, though he manages to eat around it anyway. It starts to fade as she continues and he even looks a bit guilty as he mops out the bottom of his bowl with the rest of his bread. "He wasn't-- well, he was, but people didn't know it then. Like me, I mean. I didn't even know..." His thought trails off as B'tal's attention turns toward the rest of the kitchen. "Probably just that, yeah?"

Madilla frowns, all but drilling holes into her bread and her stew, though at least she saves B'tal from the strength of her gaze. "That doesn't seem right," she says, shaking her head. Her gaze lifts again, looking more sad, now, than anything. "It just... it doesn't. All I ever hear is something bad, and he just isn't-- He's a good person. Really. And he's going to be a good father." She shakes her head again. "He's good to you, isn't he? He doesn't-- do anything bad?"

"It's not right," B'tal agrees, gaze coming back to look at Madilla sympathetically. He's used to the wrongness of things relating to the fact that he's sharing a bed with the bronzerider, at least. It's the last of what she says that makes the greenrider frown and look vaguely uncomfortable. His gaze drops again as he says, "Of course he's good to me. Why would you even... ask something like that?" His blue eyes flicker up again but only briefly and his voice holds the slightest edge of defense.

Madilla turns scarlet. "I'm sorry," she fumbles out, head ducked towards the table. "That was inappropriate... I shouldn't have... I'm so sorry." She has to take several long, deep breaths before she can add, "it was just something Gabrion said. And I didn't think it could possibly be true, but..." She tilts her gaze up again. "I'm so sorry."

"What did Gabrion say?" That's the part that B'tal focuses on, brows furrowing in something edging slightly closer to anger. There are some lingering feelings against that person in particular, perhaps. He waves off her apology for now, though, a lot more interested in the answer to his question.

This 'something much closer to anger?' This obviously worries Madilla more than anything else, because her knuckles have turned white, and she's stopped eating. Her answer comes out at a stammer; "He said... that W'chek wasn't trustworthy. And he couldn't explain, but he did say that he thought he hit you." She looks like she'd like to sink into the floor. "I just don't understand."

"/Gabrion/," B'tal says, that coming out a little louder than he probably meant it to. He manages to speak more quietly as he continues, "Gabrion has no idea what he's talking about. You shouldn't take some kid like him at his word, Madilla. He'd never hit you or your kid, if that's what you're worried about. You know that, right?"

Madilla and B'tal are sitting at one of the tables, both eating stew. Their conversation is obviously a little intense, though the healer, blushing scarlet, ducks her head in the wake of what the greenrider says. "I know," she murmurs. "I know he wouldn't. I just-- it surprised me. How vehement he was. I didn't think he'd do anything like that... he's not like that." And she sounds relieved to be saying this.

Ivana's furtive glance toward the rider and the girl is a bit startled as she goes about getting her soup, but out of politeness she keeps her head down and pretends that she cannot hear them. Shelving doors open as she looks for a bowl and a spoon.

That little build up of anger dissipates somewhat when Madilla continues. B'tal reaches for his mug but he doesn't take a drink. He looks into it, though, and thinks for a moment before he says, "They were... together once. At least once. Might have to do with that. I haven't talked to him too much, you know, since then."

Madilla turns promptly scarlet, all over again. "Oh," is all she says, with a little escaping breath. "Oh." It's in the wake of that, and the need to look at something - anything - other than B'tal that Ivana's presence nearby is finally noted. Hastily, raising her voice, "Did you need something there?" It being so close to dinner time, the kitchen staff are busy enough not to have noticed.

Ivana looks slightly embarrassed herself, but flashes a quick smile at the question, bent down just about to open yet another door. "Th' bowls?" she asks, her hand on the pull. "Th'soup smells wonderful."

B'tal drops his voice a little lower to note, "It was after Jeibeth rose. Don't go talking about it. Please." Earnest there but that's where he falls silent and glances over to the girl that Madilla speaks to. He flickers a small, almost shy smile but doesn't volunteer himself to help on top of the healer.

"Behind you," says Madilla, warmly, bobbing her head towards a cupboard just beyond Ivana; her smile is friendly, though the flush on her cheeks has yet to entirely fide. "And there should be spoons in the basket there." It's only once she's said this that she manages to turn her attention back to B'tal, however briefly, giving him a half nod and a hurried, "Of course, no, of course. I would /never/--" Talk about something like that.

"Thank ya," Ivana replies, turning to look in the only place she hadn't looked in yet for her quarry, as always happens when you really want to find something Right Now. The clinking of spoon against bowl sounds for a few moments, then the *clunk* of the ladle, and a hiss. "Hot. Soup." Suddenly the bowl Ivana tried so hard to find is half full and being held by her fingernails. She blows on her fingers, each hand separately as the other hand holds.

"I didn't mean to get upset," B'tal offers after, voice even a little bit lower. "I'm sorry." He stirs from where he's sitting like he might get up. Then he hesitates before actually getting up, reaching for his bowl as well. "I should go, maybe," he murmurs uncertainly, looking a little uncomfortable. And he turns to go but at least for the moment it's just to drop off his bowl and get another roll. He returns but doesn't sit again, eyeing Ivana while he pulls a piece off of his roll to eat.

"You're welcome," says Madilla, promptly, keeps half an eye on Ivana, as if to reassure herself that the girl is going to be all right after this, though her attention keeps its primary focus upon B'tal. She looks positively wretched, now, shaking her head, even as he goes to get that roll. "You don't need to leave," she tells him, firmly. "You're allowed to get upset. I didn't mean to-- imply anything. It wasn't right."

Ivana wipes off her soup bowl surreptitiously and more carefully fills the rest of it without nearly burning her fingers this time. Spoon safely tucked in the bowl, she turns and comes to a few quick realizations right away. She takes a quick spoonful of soup and swallows. "Good," she says, smiling for Madilla's benefit.

B'tal shifts his attention back toward Madilla, slowly moving to sit down again but more toward the edge of his seat now. "You're fine. Really." Pause. "We can... do get a little... intense. Rough, I guess." Hey, she brought it up and maybe this will head off future misunderstandings and stuff. "But I /like/ it like that," he adds quickly onto that, eyes widely earnest as he looks at her. "/I/ want that. Gabe's wrong." Just in case that point hasn't been made yet.

Madilla's eyes go very, very wide, and for at least a few moments, Ivana is forgotten entirely. "I--" she begins, attempting to communicate something to B'tal, but obviously failing in her obvious distress and discomfort. "That's--" She's flushing scarlet. Ultimately, she has to look away, taking several deep breaths. Unfortunately, Ivana, having made her exit, is no help this time. "If that's what makes you happy," she says finally, "then it's no one else's business. I'm sorry I brought it up, B'tal."

Whatever bit of nerve B'tal had worked up to say that much deflates very quickly in the face of Madilla's reaction to it. He looks away, too. Down, in fact, at the roll he's apparently lost the appetite to eat. He glances up briefly to follow Ivana's progress out of the kitchen, then he's looking down again and not saying anything else. He just shakes his head to the apology as if to say it's unnecessary.

Madila sneaks a little upwards glance, awkward, after quite a few seconds of silence. Heavy, awkward, uncomfortable silence. Finally, she reaches across with the apparent intent on taking B'tal's hand; squeezing it, if he lets her. "You're happy, and that's all that matters. I'm glad you are. I'm glad that you make him happy, too."

B'tal looks at the hand that takes his and after a moment his shifts to take hers in turn. "I am. I think... hope he is, too. I'm sorry," he says the last in almost a whisper, blue eyes lifting that little bit more toward her face. "I shouldn't have said anything." His hand squeeze gently, then relaxes without actually drawing away.

Relief floods Madilla's expression as B'tal squeezes back, and she gives a little, uncertain nod. "Don't be sorry," she says, rather more firm now, squeezing his hand once more in return, then letting it go, her hand returning towards her lap. "It's no-- it's better to make it clear. I'm glad you did." She even smiles, a genuine, if still slender, little thing.

His hand stays where she leaves it but B'tal is still looking at her. He doesn't smile but his mouth does quirk slightly at one corner in response to her own smile. "Right. Well." The greenrider doesn't seem all that sure what else there is to say at the moment. At least nothing he ought to be saying, most likely.

This time it's Madilla who says, quietly, "I should go. I have some things I need to do this evening, and it might make sense to do them while most people are at dinner." Which is probably why she was up here for an early dinner in the first place. But she's still smiling, at least, and adds, as she rises, "Have a good evening, B'tal."

B'tal nods his head to her words, drawing his hand toward him as he leans back now and drops his gaze to the table. "Yeah. You, too, Madilla," he returns, expression going a little distant before she's even properly turned away.

Madilla, thus, takes her leave. But at least she doesn't do so looking creeped out, disgusted, or really, really confused. Bonus!