Difference between revisions of "Logs:Of Authority"

Your location's current time: 17:34 on day 1, month 1, Turn 58, of the Tenth Pass. It is a winter afternoon.

You meander past the enormous folding doors, into the dragon infirmary. Dragon Infirmary As you enter this huge stone building, your footsteps echo off the vast walls as your nose registers the scent of numbweed. Against the north wall of the infirmary, flanking a single door that leads to the Senior Dragonhealer's office, several large cabinets hold the majority of the supplies that any Dragonhealer would need. Large stone couches line the walls, recessed into the floor so that the human healers can easily reach their draconic patients. Huge vats of oil and several large barrels of fresh water stored around a huge pool of water are within easy access. Large folding doors to the southwest admit a refreshing breeze, clearing the medicinal smell from your senses for a moment. Obvious exits: Bowl

Amilin walks into the infirmary from the bowl. Amilin has arrived.

It's a cold winter's afternoon in High Reaches Weyr. Most Weyr occupants are ensconced somewhere warm, but not all - it shouldn't be any great surprise that R'hin is current kneeling on the floor of the dragon infirmary, scrubbing out one corner with a not-particularly-large brush, a pail of already dirty water close to hand. Given the wrinkled nature of his hands, it's a good bet he's been at it for some time.

Amilin makes her way inside with an arm full of supplies, Mostly of the sort that are easily shelved and awkward to carry, for all that they are light. Her concentration such, that she makes it several feet within the cavern before she notices exactly who's at work just then. "Ahh. Should have known..." That murmured soft enough it was likely not meant to carry as well as the next, "Good evening, R'hin."

R'hin misses the first comment, his concentration on a particularly stained area of the ground. At the greeting, he looks up, offers a vaguely sheepish smile, and salutes - spraying some of that dirty water around, since he still has the scrubbing brush in hand. Looking wry, he adds, "I'll clean that up later. Ma'am."

Amilin's careful to keep what she carries free of the water's spray, but she replies easily enough, "No harm done." she glances and gives a speculative look to how much of the floor he's managed so far, "Been at it awhile?"

To his credit, R'hin isn't one to shirk from punishment, no matter how fairly or unfairly he thinks it's applied; he's worked his way over a good quarter of the space, and that seems to have taken him several hours. "A little while," he agrees, equitably. "Not too much else to do, really; with us grounded, we can't practise any of the airbone flight formations, so it frees up a lot of time for us." The 'us' is used deliberately to convey both his and Leiventh's lack of concern; the words are stated matter-of-factly, without heat.

Amilin places her work ahead of casual conversation, though the one doesn't leave the other impossible, it just means after a speculative look for her charge this time, she nods and continues on to place her burden on a counter to work on putting away, "Yes, I image it would. How does it feel, to fall behind where the others are at in their progress?"

"How does it feel?" R'hin echoes her with a hint of surprise, as if it's the last thing he expects her to ask. He frowns a little, before he resumes scrubbing, "Do you want the standard answer? That it makes me feel frustrated and that I'll surely do better now, because impeding my progress is going to somehow make me a better rider like -that-?" He snaps his fingers sharply, glancing up at Amilin, "Or do you want the truth, ma'am? Bearing in mind that it will likely result in my being an eternal weyrling." His lips twist, but the offer is genuine.

"The truth. Far as I know no one ever asked you not to be truthful... We may prefer that you wait until an appropriate time to speak on some matters, but the truth is what we generally prefer. What *I* certainly prefer." Amilin gives him another look, delivered over her shoulder as she places something else on a shelf, "Tell me the truth, R'hin. How you know it, anyway."

R'hin pauses to wipe his forehead with the sleeve of his shirt, meeting the greenrider's look with a curious one of his own. After a moment, he gives a sharp nod, resuming scrubbing as he says, "I feel frustrated, but not because I'm falling behind. I feel frustrated because I would like to respect the Weyrlingmaster, the -position-, but I can't, because of the -person-. He openly admits he treats us as children, and he expects us to -act- like children, falling into line when our toys are taken away, or we're sent to our rooms. I, however, am an adult, with an adults reasoning, and I can only view his attitude with an adult's criticism for his behaviour as a supposed authority figure."

"Have you stopped to think at all, why it might be that he expects you to fall in line and obey him without question?" Amilin asks as she places one more item, then turns he back to the counter and regards R'hin full on. "I appreciate that you at least want to respect the position, and perhaps would like to respect the man, even if you don't see how you can just now. Being the Weyrlingmaster is truly the hardest position in this Weyr, even if you might think that falls to the Weyrleader's shoulders. Do you think it makes you any better, to act the way you see him treat you? If you don't like how he seems to perceive you?"

"I know why," R'hin counters. "I do have reason and logic. There is, however, a vast difference between, 'Do what I say, because it might save your life,', and 'Do what I say you worthless maggots, because I consider you incompetent children and the only way you'll even remember how to breathe is if you obey me because you lack the intelligence to do else.' One is an order that can be respected. The other is not." It might be noted that he even manages to put a hint of S'din's barking tone into the latter example. Evenly, he says, "I treat him as he treats me, ma'am, since he is our role model. I extend you the same courtesy, and thus I respect you, because you have treated me as an adult, and continue to do so."

Amilin lifts a hand to run through her hair, brushing it back as she considers his words, "You are right, of course, that there is a difference. But there is also a difference in the response one usually gets to each. Most, and I not most, not all, decide to take his words as a challenge. They want to prove him wrong with the latter, you see." She shrugs her shoulders, "But many don't value their lives highly enough to see that as motive enough. They start to think, that because they impressed a dragon, they've become invincible some how... And that gets people and dragons killed."

There's a sharp exhale from the bronze weyrling, voice pointedly even, "While I simply find it demeaning and unnecessary. I'm not someone who'll meekly go along. If I disagree, I'm going to say something." R'hin's expression is wry, as if he is very aware of this particular aspect of his personality, fault or no. "I imagine it's always worked for everyone else. The randomness of impression at work." He pauses to swish his brush around in the water, before shifting over to a new patch to begin scrubbing. "I'm very aware that I'm not invincible. Very," he murmurs, quietly, fervently.

S'din strolls into the infirmary from the bowl. S'din has arrived.

S'din strolls into the infirmary, moving through the large room to drop some hides on the Senior Dragonhealerr's desk. He takes a step away then turns back to scribble a note on the top of the pile. Turning, he makes his way back across the room, pausing to nod to R'hin and smile at Amilin. "Weyrling. Ami." he greets.

"It's a rare person that doesn't all into the trap of thinking they are, at some point or the other." Ami answers casually as she leans pack against the counter. Her sorting of supplies half finished. "But you are right to imagine so, that his methods have worked. Perhaps you just need to understand more, before you see why?" That said, she pauses, her gaze looking beyond where it was to give a smile in greeting, "G'eve, S'din."

R'hin is currently kneeling on the ground, scrubbing hard at a patch of the infirmary floor. He looks like he's been at it for quite some time, now, his fingers wrinkled from the water. Another stream of dirty water goes flying as the bronze weyrling automatically salutes after S'din's words draw attention to him. "Perhaps," he answers Amilin, non-committal, as his eyes shift towards the Weyrlingmaster. "Sir."

S'din returns the salute, eyeing the stream of water with something akin to morbid fascination as he comments to R'hin. "Rilsa may not appreciate that unique way of rinsing her room." His attention is drawn to Ami for a moment giving her a weary look before returning to watch R'hin work. "Are you feeling less antagonistic this evening or should I not attempt to speak with you at this time?" The question is spoken without his normal humorous tone nor his weyrlingmaster-lesson-voice.

"True," R'hin agrees, "I'd already pointed out to Amilin I was going to clean that up, too. Hazards of being a weyrling," he notes with a wry twist of lips, resuming scrubbing. The question from S'din earns an intrigued twitch of brows. "Would you avoid speaking with me if I -were- antagonistic, sir?" He lifts his hand, sharply, "Nevermind. I've not much entertainment while I finish this work, so if you wish to talk I'm certainly amenable."

Amilin gives a wry grin as she answers the comment not put to her, "He'll get it. Likely before she sees it." A moment later she lifts a shoulder in a half shrug S'din's way before she gives R'hin a longer look of the meaningful sort. One holding a question held in it, with the way she arches her brow before she nods once at his answer and turns back to her sorting while she listens.

"Yes, I would. Antagonism usually ends up meaning that the individual refuses to listen during conversations so if you were, I have no problems waiting to discuss your future and these incidents until you are ready." S'din leans against the wall, continuing to watch the weyrling work. "Short of being blunt and tactless, I want to know your mind. In this past turn or so, we have noticed there is a lack of authority respect, sense of humor, stepping up to challenges and just general participating in teamwork. We need to get to the root of this because your future is at stake." He is not being sarcastic nor trying to start a fight but he is being businesslike in his inquiry.

"I disagree." The words are spoken plainly, R'hin more puzzled than anything. "I'll be the first to admit my faults, and while yes, there've been some issues on the authority front, I've quite a sense of humor. Ask any of the weyrlings," his lips twitch, "Just because I choose not to share it with you, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. And I -am- a team player, sir, nor have I ever shirked a challenge." His back stiffens slightly, more at the erroneous accusations than any real anger. "You want the heart of the matter, sir? I do not respect you, because you treat me, and my fellow weyrlings, as children. You have since the beginning, and you continue to do so. You show a lack of respect for those under your care, and I cannot respect you as an authority figure." He shrugs his shoulders, spreading his hands.

S'din makes a statement. "You take yourself too seriously and refuse to see beyond what you decide is reality. There are clutchmates who find your humor to be brash and insulting as well yet they give you the b enefit of the doubt. I see. Interesting." His lips twitch to control either a smile or smirk, not obvious which. "How do you want to be treated? An adult follows the rules even when they tend not to agree with them. They understand there is a reason for rules. They rise to the challenges that are issued. Based on my decades of experience, the majority of individuals respond to a challenge that would prove an authority figure with the option of admitting they are ready. Have you reached that point? If so, tell me how."

"I hadn't realised we'd segued into a discussion of my personality." R'hin's voice is cold, now, any pretense of continued scrubbing given up. "Very well. Yes, it's true, some do not like me. Some do not like you, either, sir. Should that be basis for you to be treated like a child? I would say no. You may disagree." His lips thin, frustration evident. "I have told you, many times, sir. I wish to be treated as I am expected to treat someone in turn. You demand respect of me, you demand that I behave as an adult, yet treat me as a child. An adult questions what they think is wrong, and challenges views when they feel it justified. If you want to make a mindless peon of me, please, continue to treat me and my fellow weyrlings as you've been doing."

"R'hin. Some don't like me either." Amilin injects softly from where she works, turning back to add, "And yet should they respect my position or what I teach less, just because they don't? What happens if I tell them to do something, they balk because they don't like me, and then someone gets hurt, maybe not even them, but an innocent bystander. You say you respect me, because of how I treat you. But you don't respect him... Is there a difference in the two situations, personal preferences have to be set aside sometimes. To be dealt with at the right time. Now is the right time, but in class, in drills. That's not."

S'din says "We are not discussing your fellow weyrlings. We are discussing you. I have had meeting with many of your clutchmates and they have been amenable discussions. They have been willing to listen and converse." He nods. "You want to be treated with respect then show some respect for the position. Show me that you deserve to be where you are. You have to learn to rise above what people say or do to you. You have to learn to step outside your dragon color's stereotype. You have to show that you can laugh at yourself and to be a human being that is not better than everyone else." He scratches his head. "I don't need you to be my friend or vice versa. My job is to make sure you are strong, tough, able to do your job without dying and to be able to be someone that the Weyr is not embarrased to admit as their own." He pauses, obviously. "There is a time and place to question but not during ... What she said.""

S'din says "I am not the Weyrlingmaster because I want the power to abuse. I am the Weyrlingmaster because I am good at what I do. I am not perfect as we have lost weyrlings in the past." Another pause is issued. "I take those deaths personally as they are my responsibility. They were MY weyrlings. I refuse to let anyone outside our group to tear you apart. HOWEVER, I also know the difference between someone doing it seriously and someone jesting. High Reaches is a Weyr who shows affection not in the cloying public way but by feeling comfortable enough as a FAMILY to insult each other. I don't know if you have siblings but if you did, you'd understand. It is okay for them to make fun of you but Faranth help those that do it to them seriously.""

"You brought them into the argument, sir." R'hin counters, with clear exasperation. "Not me. And you keep picking at my personality as if my supposed lack of humor is somehow impeding my ability to follow orders. I do not need, nor wish you to treat me as a friend, all I ask is that you do not insult me or my fellow weyrlings, and that you do not allow us to be insulted in public. When you allow an outsider to call us brainless wherries, and you laugh and agree - what sort of example do you think that sets? It shows that you respect us so little, you hold us with so little regard us to demean us in public. Sir." His eyes cut to Amilin, his voice kept even with effort, "There is a difference, ma'am. As I pointed out, you did not demean us in public."

R'hin points out, evenly, "I did not see a single weyrling laugh at the supposed jest. Clearly, your humour was lost on the entire class. Sir."

S'din tries not to throw up his hands in frustration and looks at Amilin. "Since when is a 'Reachian miner who has lived here longer than this boy has been alive an outsider? Since when is it permissible to insult a Master of a Craft? I'm beginning to wonder if I am speaking Pernese." He looks at R'hin again and shakes his head. "We are not discussing other weyrlings. I am not sure how else I should say this but you are not their spokesman and Ami and I have had dealings with others that do not have your reactions to them. I want to get through this issue with you and you alone. I'm not here to discuss someone else with you as you are not qualified nor intimate to know the details of the others beyond gossip."

"I am right here, sir. You can address the questions to me, rather than pretending I am not here." R'hin's voice holds a hint of sharpness to it. "Very well, I will repeat my assertions, and ask that you respond to them. I felt that you treated myself, and the other weyrlings with disrespect and disregard."

S'din says "Your opinion is valid. Faulty but valid."

S'din says "You want to be treated like an adult, you have to prove you deserve the respect. I am your Weyrlingmaster and the position deserves the respect. Not once, ever, did you show any even the first day when you impressed. I did not call anyone of you any insulting names. I told you the blunt truth. You know nothing. Anything you knew until that point was no longer valid. Dragon minds and human minds are not compatible in the decision making process. You had to learn everything from the beginning. What was demaning about that?"

S'din says "Do you know how many times the Weyrleader has been insulted by a Lord Holder and do you know how many times he publically disrespected these people? None. Do you know why? Because the position DEMANDS respect."

R'hin's brow twitches. "That's all?" He exhales. "Faulty. I see. So if you were the Wingleader of a wing, and a crafter - no matter how long they had been in the Weyr for - openly insulted your wing, you would, what? Consider it to be allowable, because the crafter had been present longer than the majority of wingriders? You would allow the reputation and opinion of the wing to be impugned for the sake of age?"

"I try to respect the position, sir, but I'm finding it difficult, because I cannot respect the man." R'hin's voice is matter-of-fact, and not the least bit apologetic.

S'din says "That is not the issue. That does not apply. You respect the position regardless of the person. Personal feelings are just that, personal. You keep them personal and outside of the public view. You deal with the issue in private. Do you think Rilsa agrees with S'rist all the time? Hardly. Do you see them arguing over semantics publically? No."

"I brought it into the public arena, because you brought the issue to the fore in the public arena, and you encouraged it in the public arena. You did not take it privately." R'hin's shoulders shift in a half-shrug. "If you wish me to take up my issues with you privately, than I can certainly attempt to do that, sir. I'd hope you'd set an example in that regard, however."

"No matter how you felt about the way Master Beladin was to you, it didn't give you the right to act towards him as you did. If he'd been treated with the proper respect, he'd have given respect in return. Perhaps not the softer sort you prefer, but he's more than willing to help those willing to learn and praise those that get things right." Ami pauses significantly, "And he's not the only one you'll meet in life that is that way. Sometimes you have to just take it and deal with things through the proper channels, not face them head on yourself. Sometimes what's better is to take a problem to those with the authority to handle a situation. Use the chain of command, rather than abuse it. You have to know the consequences of your actions could be far more dire than the ones you faced during the firestone lesson. What if all riders treated crafters that way.. How long would we get by without their support? Or without the tithes from the Holds if we disrespected their Lord? We have to show you the worst of what you might face out there the best we can, so that you can learn how to correctly respond rather than getting into a bigger mess."

S'din says "Alright. If you want to be treated with kid gloves, no one will call you anything within Weyrlinghood. When you get out to the real world, all bets are off."

S'din says "You will have to learn how to deal with this on your own then. You are going to end up with much worse than what we do. We try to prepare you. However, we also know the difference between one of our own joking around and when they do not. I'm sorry you didn't understand Beladin's humor. Beladin is a minerr who is old and thinks he is funny."

S'din says "He is tactless, smelly, rude and ... well, he is Beladin. He has been teaching weyrlings longer than /I/ have been alive."

"If the Weyrlingmaster had defended us, I wouldn't have had to have said anything," R'hin counters at Amilin's words, emphatic statement. "I would -expect- that he would, because he is in the chain of authority. My issue is that he did not." S'din is given a long, even look, as if measuring him. "I certainly would appreciate the lack of insults," he says, slowly, almost warily.

S'din says "Fine. Consider any of my words other than lessons, instructions, and teachings not directed at you. You will be treated with kid gloves. Consider yourself a young lord. Okay?"

R'hin's brow draws down. "I don't ask you to treat me like a young lord. Simply that you not insult me, nor my intelligence. I don't think that's too much to ask, sir."

S'din says "I challenge. I am not insulting. I joke to lighten the seriousness. I am not insulting. I have comraderie with others in this Weyr. I have told you in the past that you have a great deal of potential. I want to see it. All I see is that you are taking things too seriously and refuse to give people the benefit of the doubt. I cannot change that other than suggesting what I had."

"I take serious things seriously, sir," R'hin says, by way of retort. He dips his brush into the water, and looks set to resume scrubbing.

"There is also the matter again of time and place, R'hin... Would you have respected what Master Beladin had to teach any better if S'din had taken him on just then to make things more comfortable for you?" Ami asks, "Or might you have thought you didn't need to listen to him?"

S'din says "Then I suggest you learn how to read the difference between serious issues and reparte between individuals."

"I took on board the Master miner's advice, however disagreeable I found his behaviour." R'hin says. "As for repartee, if it'd be simply that, I would have ignored it. It was repartee about me and the other weyrlings. That I find disagreeable."

S'din says "As I said. You need to learn to laugh at yourself. You need to stop taking certain things too seriously or you are going to end up rather bitter."

S'din says "You are not going to like everyone and let me assure you, not everyone likes you either. However, that is how life works. You can't take everything someone says about you to battle. You choose your battles. Are you being injured? Is your life being made to fall apart? No. Fight the important battles."

"I disagree with the logic of your statement. But I imagine we shall have to agree to disagree, since I believe you do not know me well enough to tell otherwise." R'hin says, evenly, before returning to the task of scrubbing the floor.

S'din says "And you do not know me well enough to tell otherwise. You also never tried. You decided on your reality of myself and nothing I have said nor tried to say is going to change that. I wish otherwise but we have been going around in a circle because I have tried to explain my personality, the personality of the majority of the Weyr, the difference between seriousness and repartee ... I do not know what else to say. I suggest you ignore anything you consider to be an insult because they are not being directed at you. Kid gloves."

"Very well, sir," the bronze weyrling's tone is even, non-committal. Rather than offering any other sort of response, R'hin concentrates on his scrubbing, moving to a new patch on the floor.

S'din says "Fine." He looks at Amilin, giving her a look that is resigned at getting through to the weyrling. "Good eve, Ami. Weyrling. I have more hidework to do."

Amilin's expression in return is of the helpless sort. Resigned as well of course, as she settles for a simple reply of, "G'eve, S'din."