Difference between revisions of "Logs:Fixed yet broken"

Questionably Painted Weyr

At the back of the weyr the cavern branches into two good-sized back rooms with a double-sided fireplace occupying the wall they share. The weyr even comes already decorated. It has an ornately carved bed and press in both of the rooms; the front area offers a polished rectangular table and six matching chairs, a set-up perfect for entertaining. Rugs are scattered across the floor, their colors bright and cheery to match the walls.

But oh, those walls! Some artistic hand has painted mural on every wall, filled with bright colors and bordered by mixed fruits and vegetables. The mildest murals are filled with exuberant scenes of dancing people, but most of them are of a more... questionable nature. They're certainly not the sort of thing any concerned parent would want their children to see, though they give the weyr a definite party atmosphere.

It's the end of what's been a long day for N'ky. A bout of his old insomnia left him reliant on klah to get through Cirrus' drills and weyrling lectures, while the rest of his afternoon was filled with his extra Harper lessons. Skipping dinner, he went home to his new weyr - it still felt strange being there, alone in what was his place - and got changed out of his riding gear into a more comfortable pair of loose trousers and a shirt. He didn't bother with anything other than a light jacket, even though it was particularly chilly in his weyr and especially so out on the ledge, where the wind never seemed to ease up. Still, it was a small price to pay for the brilliant view of the night sky that they had, especially on a night like tonight. Belior's fullness and Timor's crescent were both visible, hanging so pendulously close that it felt almost as if they could reach out and touch them. And that, for both N'ky and Cailluneth, was perfect. After sharing a warm moment with his lifemate, N'ky clambered up to settle into her straps, gloveless, helmetless, since he knew they weren't going far, though he was glad for the goggles to keep the stinging wind from his eyes.

Cailluneth dropped lower, down to the ledge that she knew to be Rasavyth's despite neither of them having been there before. N'ky slipped from her back, then sent her off to lie in the moonlight up on their ledge. If being in his own weyr felt strange, standing outside of K'zin's was even more so, especially since Cailluneth had confirmed that the bronzerider wasn't home.

Feeling awkward due to not being invited, N'ky made his way through the couches, into the space beyond, gawking at the sheer size of it in comparison to the place he'd picked as his own. « The best ones really did get taken first, » he shared with Cailluneth, though they both knew that, despite this being far larger than their own weyr, it wasn't what they had wanted. He could see why K'zin might have chosen it, though; it suited him. It suited Rasavyth. Something inside him felt a little tweaked by it all - a hint of jealousy, perhaps? - but he squashed it down, dismissing it. Now wasn't the time for feelings like that. He shrugged off his jacket, draping it over the back of one of the chairs and setting his goggles down on the table beside it. Then, after having a quick peep into each of the two separate rooms and a bit of eyeballing of the paintings he'd been so keen to see, he picked the one that was clearly used as K'zin's bedroom. He ran his fingers gently over the quilt on the bed, the 'Reaches black and blue, with that unmistakable Rasavyth-coloured decoration, then folded it up carefully, setting it on top of the press. The rest of the sheets he was far less gentle with, tugging them just so, pulling the pillows off and kicking them under the bed, making what was probably the hugest cot-fort ever. How the shell did K'zin end up with such a massive bed, anyway?

With the den set up N'ky snuck into it, curling up with his head on one of the pillows. It was strange how it smelt like K'zin, but that was comforting - just being there was comforting. Comforting enough that, before he even realised how tired he was, N'ky fell asleep.

Long days are the only kind K'zin knows since he got that nice belated turnday gift from Quinlys. He's had to set by the wayside some of his personal pursuits in favor of being successful with the ones he's been tasked with. Even so, it hasn't been easy and he's had his failings and struggles. He and Rasavyth have been in the Training Cavern studying often after all the many lectures are over and done with for the day. He's even had to cut back from exercising three times a day to only once beyond the regular weyrling workouts. Even so, he doesn't arrive back at his weyr until fairly late in the evening, but at least when he does he's freshly bathed, and usually toting some kind of goodies.

Tonight is no exception to the new norm, for K'zin. That is until Rasavyth lands on the ledge. « We are not alone. » How does he know? Maybe he couldn't even put it into words. This is his home. He just knows.

« Someone we know? » K'zin wants to know as he slides to the ground and starts unbuckling the bronze's straps.

« Familiar. » Rasavyth can say with certainty, but he doesn't offer further insight, likely because he doesn't know. As ever, when somethings up with the home, Ras has to check it out first. He slides through the tunnel and into where his couch is, observing it carefully. Nope, no one's slept here. Then his neck snakes further in. « There. »

The image of the shifted bed sheets visible through the open doorway to K'zin's bedroom is flashed as K'zin gets the straps hung up. For a moment, the rider is confused. Then amused. He pulls from the straps his sack-o-goodies and heads into the weyr. The sack, spilling its contents of rolls and fruit and other easily-traveled foodstuffs arrives on the tabletop. He takes in the sight of the not-his flight jacket and goggles, shrugging out of his own to hang it on another chair, then he's tugging off his boots, leaving them there by the chair as well.

Silently, he pads into the bedroom, taking a moment to observe the removal of his quilt, and then he's sinking down onto his knees beside the bed. He takes a breath before reaching to pull back the edge of the bed-fort and finds nothing. Alright, otherside then. He pushes up and moves around to the other side, this time bending down so his head's upside-down peering under the blanket to find N'ky there, asleep. A small smile spreads across his lips, half amused, half--- something. A good something. Things must be getting back to normal then.

A soft, soft lilac creeps up upon Rasavyth's mind, gentle as smoke, clouding the rainbow that hides behind it. It's quiet with the peace of sleep, heavy with the promise of dreams, accompanied by the soft lub-dub of a resting heart - her Heart, caught up in silvered sleep, woven in Cailluneth's lavender blanket. « Gentle, » she both warns and encourages, in her whispery voice. (To Rasavyth from Cailluneth)

Moonlight is caught in the shimmering ooze that tonight is more iridescent than invisible, and it's reflected softly back toward the sleepy green. There's invitation there, an image of the second empty hollow, filled with inviting pillows. Hers for the night if she should like to be physically closer to her lifemate. « He will not wake him. It is good that he sleeps. » Rasavyth is aware because K'zin is aware of N'ky's occasional sleeping difficulties.

K'zin settles the sheet back down so it once again obscures the sleeping greenrider. He moves quietly to the press, and moves the quilt back to the bed. Next, a set of simple, worn, black sleeping clothes are drawn out of the press and he strips, silently, replacing leathers with pants and shirt.

He's got a bed, he's got a blanket-- but a pillow? Another peek under the bed confirms that they've all been taken and are quite snugly in use. Eyes are rolled in a tolerantly amused manner. He might be mad under normal circumstance, wake N'ky up, but there's something so nice about things getting back to some semblance of their former relationship after so much upheaval that nothing little like a lack of pillow could upset K'zin just now. Instead, he ducks out of the room, to return moments later with pillows from the bed in the next room over.

He slides carefully onto the bed, on the opposite side that N'ky is sleeping under, and lies down, snuggling into the quilt and it doesn't take long for the bronzerider to fall asleep himself.

While she may at first have been reluctant to leave the light of the moons, Cailluneth eventually alights on Rasavyth's ledge, coyly making her way within. Her thoughts for him are filled with lullaby shades as she curls up neatly, chin on her tail, after circling round on the spot several times. She exhales a tired sigh, closing her eyes but not switching off; sleepy but trying to remain alert, tuned in to Rasavyth's thoughts.

Rasavyth's thoughts as he lays curled comfortably in his own couch are sleepy, soft. In fact, his mind has probably never been more cozy and inviting than it is right now. Despite that little niggling of 'something' not quite right that can't help but be there, his thoughts are like a blanket, and for Cailluneth, it's a blanket of delicate moonshine. Soon enough, the bronze's mind surrenders to sleep. After all, it's been a long day, and he knows another will follow.

It's hours before N'ky wakes up. He's slow about it, rolling over onto the stolen pillows before being struck with that feeling that he doesn't know where he is. When it hits he pushes up, thudding his head off the bottom of the bed with a hollow crack, before sinking back down into the feather-filled softness of the pillows with a groan. Opening his eyes at last, he tilts his head to the side to look for K'zin... and his heart sinks when he realises the bronzerider isn't there. Quiet as he can manage, he creeps out from under the bed, stiff and cold from lying on the weyr's floor for so long.

"Mnn-uh?" K'zin's sound of sleeply awareness comes on the heels of the groan from beneath the bed. The sense that there is movement nearby has his brown eyes fluttering open. From his quilt-cocoon, the bronzer blinks as the greenrider comes into view. His voice is groggy from sleep, "Nick, hey-" He struggles in the confines of the wrap he made for himself to sit up. "Sleep ok?" He yawns, "What time is it? Time for breakfast?" The last question comes in a combination of hopeful and despairing; food is always good, but waking up? Not the most pleasant thing on the scant few hours he's gotten.

A quick check with Cailluneth clarifies that it isn't anywhere near breakfast time, as the moons are still high in the sky above them and Rukbat is nowhere to be seen; this is their time of night. N'ky rubs at the back of his head, wincing at the sore spot where it hit the underside of the bed, while squinting at K'zin. "Not breakfast," he says hoarsely, shaking his head at the bronzerider. He stretches stiffly, lazily stifling a yawn before dropping his hand down to lift his shirt and scratch his tummy. "'m gonna go." Cailluneth begins to stir in her borrowed couch, wings rustling as she yawns loudly and begins to unfurl for a waking-up stretch.

"But you just got here," comes K'zin's sleepy protest. "You know, before you fell asleep." His eyes look so sleepy, but he blinks them to make them wake a little more, just as he frees an arm from the quilt stretching it. "Didn't you want something? Or to say hi? Or were you just coming to see the--" He points toward the sexually explicit art on his bedroom wall, and then starts to yawn so the pointing finger is stolen to cover it. "Aren't you still tired? Why get up and fly now? There's lots of room here." It's easy to tell from his tone that some of this is laziness talking. If he can't be swayed by these words, then K'zin will have to get out of bed, and he doesn't wanna. "Bed's comfier than the floor." That might explain why K'zin chose the bed's top instead of underside for sleeping.

"I came..." Why did he come again? N'ky searches his sleepy memory, covering up another yawn. Does it matter why he came? Apparently, not, as he shrugs his shoulders to brush the question off. He looks over at the murals, wrinkling his nose thoughtfully. "Not to see them. But... b-but I like that one." He points at one in particular, blushing a little as his gaze lingers over it. "Cailluneth will fly, not me." It's a sad, half-hearted attempt at humour as he scratches at his cheek, which still bears marks from the scrunched-up pillow he was asleep on. A couple of moments of silence follow, then N'ky drops down to his knees, crawling back under the bed. Seconds later he's blindly throwing the pillows up on top next to K'zin - maybe even hitting him in the process. Then he pops back up and crawls onto the mattress beside the bronzerider, flopping onto his back with a grunt. "I'm stiff." In the couch, Cailluneth stretches a little more before getting to her feet and wandering out to the ledge; she lies down there, gaze canted up towards the moons and stars above them. She's awake now, even if N'ky is only partway there.

If the muffled 'ermph' of protest is anything to go by, at least one pillow found it's unintended mark. By the time N'ky's back up on top, K'zin's shoved it off though, not having moved much out of his cocoon. "That's what happens when you sleep on the floor," K'zin points out intelligently, another yawn eating part of his last word. He wiggles on the bed, getting a little more comfortable now. "You know you stole all the pillows? Next time choose the bed. Cot-forts are nice, but beds are nicer." Another yawn as brown eyes blink slowly, watching the greenrider. "Cold?" He asks, "I wasn't sure if you needed a blanket, but I saw this one put over there," He nods toward the press. "So I figured you didn't?" Was he wrong? His voice asks. K'zin might be awake, it seems. What about Rasavyth? Initially, one might think not, but then the tail shifts ever so slightly and there are whirling eyes peeking out from under it, seeking along the ground out to the ledge where the green now sits. « No longer tired? » The tenor purrs in a whisper appropriate to the serenity of the nightscape.

N'ky rolls over onto his side with a grunt, dragging a pillow over to rest his cheek on. "I thought you'd join me," he murmurs, eyes closed, curls falling over the slight frown on his brow. "Your blanket looked too nice to put on the floor. And I didn't think you'd be happy to come in and find me in your bed." Suddenly he sits up, tucking his knees up so he can start unlacing his boots. They're kicked off to the floor, then he flops back down again, making grabby-hands at the quilt, but not moving to pull it off K'zin. One eye cracks open, and he peers at the bronzerider. "How do you sleep with them all around you?" Spoken thickly, with a tiny twitch of his head to indicate the people painted on the walls.

To Rasavyth, Cailluneth shares the refreshing chill of the night air, the beauty of the heavy, glorious Belior and her crescent sister amongst the liquid-dark sky. A sparkle of silver explodes like a bursting star to fill the night with even more beauty: how can a mind sleep, when the world is this beautiful?

"I'd never begrudge you a spot to rest your head," K'zin answers the greenrider's concerns, but that's all he can manage to get out before the man's sudden movements startle the bronzer, into action. "What-" He starts to ask as he, too, sits upright, quickly, eyes suddenly very much awake as though there might be some danger to respond to. Then the greenrider's unlacing his boots and that has K'zin laughing. Laughing at himself, laughing in relief. He flops back on the bed. Clearly, he's tired. He waves a hand at the paintings, "Really, after a couple nights, you don't really notice them unless you're trying to notice them." He manages eventually.

Closing his eyes and not putting up a fight for the blanket he blindly reached for, N'ky rolls over onto his tummy, hugging a pillow to him with his face to K'zin. He exhales a sigh - tired, but not necessarily sleepy; he's very used to being awake at this time of night. "I'd dream about them all the time," he admits quietly, in a near-whisper. Maybe that's why he's not lying on his back any more? Shuffling a little closer, the greenrider half-smiles, peeping over the curve of his pillow at his friend. "I missed you. I m-missed you so much and I hated you for how you made me f-feel, and I hated myself for hating you because you're my best friend, but how could my best friend make me feel so... w-worthless? And I d-didn't even have my best friend to talk to about it, and I d-didn't know what to do and everything just kept g-getting w-worse and worse..." He closes his eyes, hiding his face in his pillow. After a moment, he looks back up. "You c-can't ever make me feel like that again, K'zin. E-ever. I can't bear it. Cailluneth lost her colours."

The grabby-hands, it seems, were entirely missed by K'zin, until his brain caught up from his startle to action. He shifts so that he's not now on top of the quilt as well as under and he fluffs it up and lays it over the greenrider, leaning to tuck it gently on the far side of the greenrider. "How cold are you? I can get the fire going." He offers as he sits back. There's a grin of sympathy for N'ky's talk of how the murals would affect his sleep. "The other room's not as bad." So why K'zin picked this one? Well, who knows. But apparently they don't keep him awake at night. He falls silent to listen, expression turning pained. He pushes a pillow behind himself, sitting with his back against the headboard, hands folded in his lap. When the greenrider has finished, K'zin is reaching a hand to seek one of N'ky's. He wraps it firmly in his grasp before he speaks. "I hated myself for making you feel like that. I never meant to. And it was confusing, too, because I didn't understand how you could think I was serious." His expression betrays hurt; clearly N'ky is the more wronged party, but K'zin is not without his own wounds from all this. "You're my best friend, Nick. I care about you more than I care about anyone other than Ras. I think you're amazing. If I didn't, you wouldn't be my best-friend." His look turns meaningful, and it's clear the effort it takes him to find the words to articulate this. "I never want you to feel like that again, and I'm going to do my best to make sure I never say anything that stupid again, but I need for you to believe me when I tell you that you are --" He struggles, trying to identify a way to describe the swell of pride and emotion locked away in his heart and reserved for this, his best friend. "You're unbelievably amazing, Nick. You get me in a way that no one else ever did, until-" He doesn't need to say it. There are facts they must face: their dragons understand them better than any person could. "I've always thought that. I couldn't believe that you didn't know that. But I guess it's my fault that you didn't 'cause I have a hard time saying things." He swallows hard, and falls silent, hand still clasped around his friends, staring at his free one where it sits in his lap.

Tucked into the blanket and warm enough, it's N'ky's turn to listen now. He keeps a gentle hold on K'zin's hand as the bronzerider speaks, though the amount of praised heaped upon him makes him squirm and frown uncomfortably. But, he stays quiet, waiting until his friend's finished. He doesn't say anything, but he does shift their hand-hold to lace their fingers together, squeezing softly. It's a stand-in for not being able to find the right words, a sign to say that everything's... getting there. Becoming alright. Eventually, he says: "Is your bed our new 'fort?" Tilting his head back to look up at K'zin with a cheeky grin. He squeezes their joined hands harder, then lets go so he can sit up too, curling the blanket around his knees. "I'm s-sorry that I thought you would think that about me." This is followed by a shoulder-bump, and a very sheepish smile.

"As long as you know now that I wouldn't. That I never could." K'zin's answer to his sheepish smile is a serious but kind look. Then he's willing to let that go by the wayside. With his hand freed, it finds its way back to settle with the other in his lap. "Well, we might have to have two forts. Unless you have like, a hammock or something in your weyr? I hear some people do. That wouldn't make a fort well. But I think, really, you've already answered that question. You looked like you had plenty of room down there. Maybe I'll see about getting some thin mattress for down there so it's not quite so hard, in case you want to zonk out there again." He grins towards the greenrider. "Could probably loft the bed up more, if you think an expansion is in order?" He nods to the fort in question.

"D'kan said about getting a hammock. I'm going to, when I have some marks, and some time to go looking for one." N'ky hugs his knees to his chest. "I'd like a big double one. I think I've got enough room for it if I push the sofa aside, but I'll need to measure everything up." He doesn't seem so taken by the suggestion of him sleeping more under the bed, though. "I... I dunno, Waki. I only made it so we could talk. I thought it m-might help things." Like it always has done in the past. Only this time, he ended up in there alone. "I'm n-not planning on sleeping under your bed. I have my own."

"I bet the Seacrafters make the best hammocks. When I was working on the ship scene for the play, Bones mentioned that they sometimes sleep in hammocks on a ship. They've gotta be sturdy. Probably wouldn't be too hard to get ahold of one, once we can between. Maybe Jo could help you get one? She's good at getting things." Then the double bed is considered and he nods. "I bet you could find one with the right dimensions in the stores. Might even be able to get a Woodcrafter to make any tweaks you might need for your height or whatever. Take a footboard off, or something. If need be." K'zin is thougthful as he offers up suggestions. The matter of the fort is given equal consideration. "Nick, you know that I only didn't come down there because you looked like you needed the sleep and I didn't want to wake you to talk, right? You can ask Cai--lluneth." He stumbles a little as he remembers how the greenrider prefers his lifemate's name. "Ras was supposed to tell her for me that I wouldn't wake you. It's not 'cause I didn't want to talk. You know that, right?" He chews his lower lip uneasily.

"A double hammock, Waki. I have a bed. I just told you." N'ky snorts. "It's not a bed a Woodcrafter could do anything with, anyway. I... kinda fit in it. Just about." He leans over to bump his shoulder against K'zin's, then stifles a yawn - which is followed by a huge, joint-popping stretch. "I thought you might've joined me anyway; I would've woken you up. Or been there, anyway, when you woke up yourself." His curls are ruffled, then he smoothes them down a little, brushing back that rogue one that always springs forth in front of his eye. "Do we have to sit up?" The greenrider squirms down into the bed, tucking the quilt up under his chin and snuggling into a pillow. He peers up at K'zin, suddenly looking worried; "Are we too old now to share a bed without people... thinking things? Alida... she th-thought I was looking for Bones for sex when I was in the greenhouse... I o-only wanted to ask him about some plants. D-does she think I'm... d-do I act like I'm... one of those greenriders?"

"Ohhh." K'zin's face had just started to look confused when the greenrider corrects him, his thoughts finally catching up with him. "Well, what do you expect when you wake me up in the middle of the night?" It might sound grumpy, except a small throw pillow gets-- well, thrown, at N'ky. Not hard, just a toss aimed to bap him somewhere. It's playful. A distraction from K'zin's stupidity. "I was here when you woke yourself up," K'zin complains. "Are you really going to hold it against me that I didn't want to be as stiff as you've said you are?" He slides down in the bed, shaking his head. "No. But we are too old to tell people we're sharing a bed for something other than sex. They wouldn't understand." But clearly he does. "I don't think you do? Have you been acting differently with her?" They have been out of touch awhile.

"So long as they," meaning their dragons, "warn us if anyone's coming... because we're n-not letting anyone think that we're... that we're doing that, are we?" N'ky frowns slightly, biting down on his lip. Then his expression changes when K'zin asks about how he's been acting around Alida; there have been some very different interactions between the two, only... well, he's sworn to secrecy and won't dare risk her wrath by opening his mouth. Will Waki pick up on that? "I... no. N-not to give her that impression. No." It's the truth, but not the whole truth. "I've k-kinda been, um... you know April?" He blushes when he mentions the weyrling assigned to Cirrus, a sultry smile curling up the corners of his lips. "We've been, um... y-y'know. She got her weyr early on, and... um... yeah. She's... she's hot."

"No. We're not." Beat. "Because we aren't, right?" K'zin tries to make it sound casual and he does a half-fair job of it though though the shared mattress and quilt, N'ky might feel his body tense nervously. About Alida, K'zin will simply nod. There are things he, too, cannot say for fear of his poor broken fingers. "Then I don't see why Alida would think you were one of those greenrider." He grins at his friend, and then his eyebrows raise. "You and April?" He questions, "She is hot." He agrees readily, and then he pulls an arm out from under the covers to point at one section of the wall, "Just to be clear, like that? With her?"

N'ky props himself up to look at the painting indicated by K'zin, squinting at it - tilting his head to the side to get a better look. "Nah." He shakes his head, taking hold of the bronzerider's hand and nudging it slightly to the side, so it's pointing to another one; a slightly more explicit one. His grin, bitten down hard on, is both embarrassed and incredibly pleased with himself as he sinks back down into his pillow. He rolls over onto his stomach, then onto his side, facing K'zin but not looking up at him, when he says: "We... w-we could. I-I... I would. Not now," he's quick to add, "but I want to, i-if not with you, then... s-someone." It's an echo of K'zin's tone, maybe even a notch lighter, but it comes across as a little forced as he tries to keep it breezy.

There's laughter from K'zin as his point is redirected to another image. "That looks like fun. I'll have to try it sometime." Then, there's a blurt. The thing about blurts is that they're not planned and the blurter seldom has control over them. K'zin's blurt: "I'm not a virgin anymore." It's his turn to look embarrassed, his cheeks flaring with color. It's hard to say if this embarrassment carries over to the topic of another kind of virginity or not. "I know we said no girl, guy, dragon, or awkward first time experiences would break us apart, but... I almost did it. We almost did it. Break us apart I mean... I'm just-- I'm worried that an awkward first time experience will just drive us apart again. And I-" The man's voice catches in his throat and he turns his face, but not enough to fully hide just how deep the emotion runs. "I can't lose you again." It comes out in near-whisper. "What do you think?" This is asked moments later, once he can trust his voice again.

K'zin's blurted admission is met with what begins as a smirk, but slowly grows into N'ky grinning shyly, though he's clearly pleased for - and proud of! - his best friend. He's not blushing quite as badly as the bronzer is, but what's said next certainly darkens the rosy hue of his cheeks. This is more serious talk and it requires him to be sitting up, so he pushes up onto his knees, resting his hands on his thighs. What K'zin says makes him frown, and he looks down at his fingers where they curl into the fabric of his trousers. He doesn't say anything for a long while, attention held downwards, lip chewed on; but he does look up when K'zin looks away. Those whispery words cause his mouth to twitch uncomfortably, and he reaches for his friend's chin to turn his head back, allowing their gazes to meet, brown on brown. "Are you going to hurt me?" His hand drops from the weyrling's chin, down to capture one of his hands - it's raised and pressed palm-down atop his heart. "Are you going to hurt me here, Waki?" N'ky shakes his head, which causes his loose curls to fall down over his eyes. He curls both hands around the stolen one pressed to his chest, drawing it up to his lips for a quick kiss to K'zin's fingertips. "You won't hurt me again." There's confidence there as he laces their fingers together, holding tightly.

K'zin can't hide his uneasiness. The struggle is obvious on his face. "Nick, I don't want to hurt you again. Not ever. But I'm--" The bronzerider loses his speech to a swallow that shoves emotion back down his throat. He can't continue his original thought. Instead, he starts anew, "I know I couldn't handle it if we messed stuff up again. I don't know if it will mess stuff up if we do that, but-- I--" His hand squeezes the greenrider's. "I need things between us to be okay. I need us to trust this." Their friendship. "I'm not saying no, I'm saying I don't know." Then there's a little noise of frustration. "I feel like I'm fucking up even talking about it." His free hand scrubs across his face before he tries again. "I just need us to be-- normal for a while. Before we take a chance that it's going to get hard again. Does that make sense?"

The contact from Rasavyth sort of flutters against Cailluneth's moonlight. For once, as he moves over to join her on the ledge, to gaze out on the beautiful night, there is no reflection of her. This? It comes from him. He's there. His invisible presence is vast and deep. It's covered in complicated woven webs interlocking and lacing a beautiful pattern across the expanse. The patterns reveal without a veil a glimpse of how the bronze sees the world. « I have agreed with my K'zin that I shall not leave his relationship with your N'ky alone. » An agreement, it can be sensed, made long ago in a time he recalls only through K'zin's vivid memory, when they were not close. When he was an unwelcome mind with his rider. Before he could read the words of his lifemate's heart and mind. Now those words are clear to him; he understands, « I do not believes it counts if I am helping. » Which he evidently intends to do now. « My K'zin is complicated. And simple. He feels deeply but knows not how to say what he feels. Your N'ky is very important to him. How important, I cannot truly put into words. He does not mean to hurt your N'ky in saying this. He needs time. »

N'ky returns the squeeze on his hand, listening with a neutral, soft expression. "Ok," he says quietly when K'zin finishes, nodding his head. "It's ok." Work-roughened fingers reach out to cup his friend's cheek, palm curved around his jaw. "It's ok, Waki. You're not going to mess anything up." Where their hands are joined, the greenrider raises them to his shoulder, letting go so K'zin's arm drapes over him, which allows him to wrap his arms around his friend's waist, grabbing him and yanking him down on the bed into a cuddle. Once he's got him there, N'ky can reach up to stroke through his dark hair, a gentle smile curled upon his lips. "We don't have to. It's ok. I... th-there's someone else I can go to... to do that." He squeezes tightly, pressing his cheek to his friend's and sighing. "You can talk about it. It's not going to ruin anything, because I love you. N-not that way," he pulls back, pulling a face and even laughing a little, "but... our way. A best friend way. You know? And that's why you're not going to hurt me again." He pauses, lips pursed thoughtfully. "That, and, well, next time I'll punch you a good bit higher." Grinning, he taps his finger off the bronzer's nose. "Is that ok? Is this ok?" This, as in the cuddle-hold he's still got his friend in.

The honesty in Rasavyth's approach is appreciated by Cailluneth; she reaches for it, swirling a soft rainbow of night-stolen colours around his thoughts; velvet darkness, crafted from black, plum, navy, grey, speckled with the white-hot glow of stars, and shimmering with her own moonlight. She accepts his physical presence with a rumbling growl, reaching up to brush her muzzle against his cheek, shifting to gently lean her weight against his side. His words are taken, cast in silver, secured within the darkest parts of her rainbow mind - she understands, but is not necessarily concerned by them as is confirmed by the steady thud-thud of her ever-present heart, tonight tickled with flame not unlike their dam's. It beats softly, a dark echo of the star-sprinkled calm that is her midnight mind. Her Heart is not hurting, so why would she care for pacts not concerning him? The nightsky ribbon wound through Rasavyth's thoughts is tightened, a silky-smooth pull to bring him closer, an invitation for him to bask in Timor's light with her.

Tension grows in K'zin. The touch to his jaw, then the drawing of his arm around the greenrider, his body starts to flex in increasing anxiety. Then the yank has him tight all over. Even as his friend speaks those well-intentioned words, meant to set him at his ease about the agreement of months prior, it becomes obvious that things are not okay, and he's starting to pull away. "I can't handle this," It's the best he can manage, baritone strangled and expression showing his unease and confusion. "I don't want to hurt you," He says again, face making an effort for neutrality instead of freaking-out, "But I can't handle this." Snuggling and platonic declarations of feeling is not what he meant by normal. Then again, this feeling stuff is what he said made N'ky the best of them. K'zin's feeling stuff? Locked up tight and buried under mountains of discomfort.

Rasavyth's mind takes on the reflection of her moonlight and darkness. He crouches on the ledge, frame uneasy as he takes on some of K'zin's discomfort. He cannot be at peace in this moment, no matter how lovely the night is.

If K'zin wants to pull away, N'ky doesn't stop him. He lets him go then sits, up, brushing a hand through his curls and wincing at the reaction; not hurt, not even confused, just... accepting. "Ok." He doesn't have to fully understand the whys behind it all to nod his head, showing that everything really is alright. "You're not going to hurt me, K'zin. I told you." The bronzerider gets a reassuring smile before N'ky turns around on the bed, dropping his feet to the floor and padding to the end where his kicked-off boots are. "We're ok," he says again as he bends down to retrieve them, before hopping back up onto the bed to slip his feet back inside and start lacing them up. "Whatever you want. We're ok. I promise." With one boot half-laced, he turns around to hold out his hand towards Waki, wiggling his fingers to invite a squeeze. "I'm gonna go. But we're ok. You're ok, I'm ok... it's all ok." And that, it would seem, is the word of the night. He stamps his feet down, settling them properly inside his boots. "Do you want to talk about it, before I go?"

K'zin does want to pull away, it seems, for he does it and sits up, sliding to the edge of the bed. His hands grip the edges of the quilt as he sits on it on either side of his thighs. If N'ky rounds the bed to see, the expression is dark, troubled, frustrated. He misses the reassuring smile and the extended hand, not out of malice, but because now he's trapped in his own headspace. He hears the words, for there's little nods to his sentiments that they are okay. When N'ky asks if the bronzerider wants to talk about it, the man's shoulders visibly tense and there's silence before he's shaking his head: no. It's possibly (probably) not the answer he wants to give, but the only answer he can give. An attempt to talk now would probably result in more angst than would be good for either of them, especially with things so freshly "okay," Not too much too fast K'zin had once had to tell himself with going to N'ky. Now, it seems, it's N'ky's turn to indulge K'zin's figurative long road. "Sorry." It's croaked in a half-whisper, throat as tight as the rest of him.

Coming around the bed, N'ky runs his fingers through the bronzerider's hair, ruffling it affectionately before he crouches down in front of him, getting low enough to smile right in his friend's face. It's one of those big, goofy smiles that's meant to be contagious, and he presses his forehead to Waki's, holding nose-to-nose, brow-to-brow, for a few seconds. "Sh-shuddup, silly. It's ok. I told you." He gives the weyrling a gentle headbutt before wrapping his arms around him in a tight, tight squeeze. "Do you trust me, Waki?" He pulls back, still crouching, holding up his index finger warningly. "One word only, just yes or no. No explanation." And if the bronzerider tries to say more? N'ky will press that finger to his lips to shush him.

The close contact isn't helping K'zin calm down. On the ledge, Rasavyth is becoming gradually more agitated, starting to pace behind where Cailluneth lounges. The weyrling's knuckles have started to go white where they grip the quilt, and the hug isn't returned. He's statue still, though brown eyes tracked the smiling face coming into view, expression unchanged. After a long silence, the bronzerider manages one word; just one. "Yes."

"Then trust me," N'ky says softly, resting his hands lightly on his friend's knees. "And smile, for Faranth's sake." But he doesn't push, sighing softly. "What'd you say I'm best at? Best for? Whatever it is you and Alida think?" Cailluneth gets to her feet lazily, stretching out and yawning canine-like as she extends silvery calm to Rasavyth, laced with peaceful lavender and soft, soothing camomile gold, all backed by the goldenpink of her Heart, that thumps with a comforting rhythm.

"Feelings." This comes a touch faster than the last response, but still slowly. K'zin's expression doesn't change. It would be dishonest and dishonesty wouldn't be the way to reforge the busted bits of the foundation of their friendship. Rasavyth's invisible bugs that do the weaving and are the webs and patterns of his existence meet Cailluneth's touch with muted color as he paces. « He feels pressured. » The ooze pops like an air bubble reaching the surface in a boiling pot. « He needs to come to things in his own time. »

"Then know you can trust them, ok?" N'ky sighs softly, stroking his fingers up through K'zin's hair again, gently touching his cheek. "If you trust me you have to trust how I feel, and know that I'm here, Waki. Always. Even if I'm angry and hating you because you say the wrong thing... you're the most important person to me on the whole of Pern. Do you believe me?" He winces, dropping his gaze as his eyes close. "I'm sorry. I don't want to pressure you." Cailluneth's passing on the message from Rasavyth, no doubt. "But I need you to know that I'm here, ok? For anything. I... I don't have a bed to make a fort out of but you can come up to my weyr and sneak into my bed and wait for me whenever you want, ok?"

He can't give the answer the greenrider wants. K'zin continues to sit like a dimwit, knuckles white. There comes, at the end of all the words and a few beats later, a nod from the weyrling. Whether the nod answers that he believes the greenrider or if it's a nod to confirm that he knows N'ky's there, or a nod that he'll bear in mind the blanket permission to answer, he doesn't explain. He doesn't speak again. His eyes are still intently on the other man's face, and the expression is frozen still in anxiety, frustration and confusion. There is regret when Rasavyth's tenor reaches to Cailluneth again. Sincere apology glitters in his ooze. « I do not think your N'ky can help him right now. »

Cailluneth acknowledges Rasavyth with her gentle touch, but nothing more; her link fades from his, leaving him to tend to his own. "Ok. It's ok - it's all ok. Whatever you need, Waki, it's ok. I promise." N'ky withdraws his hands from his friend's knees, standing up with a soft sigh. "I'm sorry. Whenever you need me, ok? Whatever you need from me." He runs fingers through his own hair now, looking regretfully down at his best friend; did he manage to just break whatever they've only just fixed? "Get some sleep. I'll see you at dri--" Not drills. Not since he's in another wing. "I'll see you around, ok?" With one last gentle touch, a squeeze of fingers to K'zin's shoulder, N'ky turns to leave, straight to the couch and past his friend's bronze, who gets a whispered: "Show him he can trust me, Rasavyth - help me fix him? I miss him." Then, jacket and goggles forgotten, he's straight out onto the ledge and vaulting up Cailluneth's side. She wastes no time in taking off; it's probably just as well there aren't any weyrlingmasters about because he certainly didn't take the required time to buckle in properly, let alone check his straps. « Ok. Ok. Everything's o-frickin'-k... I've broken it, Cailluneth, haven't I? »

Another nod is managed for the man, but K'zin is otherwise still. There's no sound that he moves once N'ky has left the room either. Rasavyth's eyes whirl swiftly blue/green mixed with shades of red-orange and yellow. His eyes are a rainbow of feeling as vibrant as some of Cailluneth's mental colors. To the green, for he does not seem inclined to contact the rider directly, « My K'zin is not broken. » It's more firm than annoyed, though there's an undercurrent of that. A beat of nothingness, then, « But » His touch his suddenly weary and weighted. « I will do what I can. They are friends. » As though this explains things will somehow work out. « Give him time. » He reiterates, then his touch is walled off, as it very rarely is, shutting them out to bend his focus to the internal distress of his lifemate.