Difference between revisions of "Logs:Descent into darkness"

Bathing Pools, High Reaches Weyr

Omnipresent clouds of steam slink across the tops of three naturally warm pools, set into the floor of this kidney-shaped cavern. Near the entrance the ceiling is high and polished, gleaming with little mineral specks as it sweeps downward into increasingly ragged, uneven steps. The foremost of the pools is squared off with wide steps leading down into the water and has faucets for bringing in cooler water from a rain-catching cistern. Primarily used for laundry, there's an almost constant film of suds along its surface until the circulating current clears it at the end of the day. Four sinks line the nearest wall and various tubs stored beneath allow for the washing of delicates. Laundry bags can be dropped off in the bins near the door and clean, folded laundry is stacked in rows of tall cubbies for easy pickup.

The bend in the cavern leads to a rougher-hewn part of the chamber where the two circular bathing pools welcome those in need of a wash. Towels and washcloths are kept in neat stacks on shelves along the wall, along with sacks of sweetsand and a few bars of precious soap. Stone benches provide a place for sitting to remove shoes and clothing, while a row of gleaming brass hooks stand above, ready to hold clothes and robes.

Settled in one of the pools after dinner, her hair and body already washed - the former twirled atop her head and secured with wooden sticks - Alida tries to soak her cares away. Good luck. Still, at least the blonde is somewhat more relaxed than she was a few days ago, though the remnants of her volatile encounter with Quinlys still linger in the dark shadow within green eyes, the subtle turn-down of lips. Right now, she's leaning up against the wall in her specific pool which contains the niche holding bathing supplies.

Since returning to the barracks a few days after the incident at the lake, K'zin has been without privileges. The formal explanation is simply that he broke rules and is being punished indefinitely. Rumors vary widely from the mundane to the wild. K'zin, himself, has been quiet on the subject, throwing himself into studies, though visiting the healers more often than he did prior to the incident at the lake. Perhaps his leg is bothering him, or his still-healing nose. Wherever he goes that isn't in public, he's shadowed by a babysitter. Except for things like this: if the man can't be trusted to bathe himself, then he needs to go back to the nanny's tending. He moves into the cavern, heading straight for the cubbies to deposit his clean clothes before stripping off the dirty and making for the water. So focused he is on his own task of washing up, he doesn't take in much of his surroundings, and doesn't spot the light haired former guard already in the pool he's now shoulder-deep in.

She hears him, however...well, hears someone entering the pool she's in. And even though the permanent mists wreath identities many times, they *do* occasionally part to reveal things...like Waki's face. Looking up at that moment in reaction to the sounds of a presence entering the water, Alida cannot help but notice her fellow weyrling...soon enough giving him a low grunt and a dark, "Waki..." in greeting. Otherwise, the blonde's still and silent in her self-engineered miasma of frustration.

He's just begun to soap himself up, starting with the most offensive: pits, one arm raised in the air when he hears his name. There's still come discoloring around his nose, though fading finally. "Alida-" K'zin's baritone is touched with surprise, "Hey." He greets, continuing the scrub that had stopped mid-motion. "How's it going? How's Ilicaeth doing?"

"Don't sound so surprised..." the blonde mumbles flatly from her place in the semi-concealing mists, Alida then smirking darkly only to herself before replying, "It...goes. He's okay." What, is she reverting back to how she was before Impression?

"You have a way of sneaking up on a person." K'zin's tone is half-complaint, half-play, seeing as how she hasn't moved at all. "All healed up and back in action?" He queries as the other pit gets the same treatment. "My legs nearly healed now. Healer's say I can start doing exercises again, lightly. In another seven, I'll be back to doing twice-a-days with you." K'zin, it would seem, is oblivious to the lack of chatter from the other woman. Perhaps he's simply gotten used to it. Or maybe he just has something important to prattle about? Nah.

Count on Waki to jabber. At this point, it's kind-of a stream of consciousness to Alida, who's partially in her own little world at the moment, though she retains enough outer consciousness to keep basic track of the gist of what's being said. When he finishes, the guard replies after some long seconds, "Good. Nose?" Beat. "Ras' head?"

Jabber: just one the many services K'zin provides free of charge. "Ras is fine. Nose is healing." He allows his jibber-jabber to be interrupted long enough to answer the questions. "Had a bunch of folks disappointed in me for not telling a better story of how it happened. I'd start saying shark attack or something, only with my luck, even with it obviously being a lie, it'd get back to someone or another and I'd be talked to in a way that makes me feel like I've pissed on the honor of my ancestors or something." That came out a little vinegary for the usual sweet innocence of the bronzerider, but there it is. "You hear about this whole silver thread thing?"

She's silent until Waki speaks of disappointment, the guard drawn out a bit more when she senses the bronzer's disaffection in his voice. "Fuck 'em." Right up the aisle. "Don't let all the fuckin' do-gooders lead ya' on... fuckin' carrots they wanna' hold out before yer nose... golden grand bullshit dreams uv' goodie-goodie rewards. It's a lie." Sour some, Alida? At her fellow weyrling's inquiry, the blonde lets out a sudden bark of foul humor, the sound of it a little twisted and scathing, the sound then followed by a clipped, "Yep."

Alida's bluntness isn't surprising. But the fact that bluntness on this topic is telling makes K'zin raise a brow and stop the rapid scrubbing of his chest. "You think?" He asks after a moment of silence. "You don't think following the rules and putting your time in will end up in being rewarded for that effort?"

"Y'think H'kon's been rewarded fer following the rules? Azaylia?" Snerk. They've been rather trodden upon, at least in Alida's view. "Fortune tends ta favor those who c'n think outside the box, mix up some rules with real innovation. Ya go by the fuckin' book, only makes it easier ta' snap said book closed on yer ass, squash ya like a bug." Intense greens stare through the mists towards where Waki should be located, trying to afix themselves to his browns. "Make yer OWN way, in yer OWN fashion. Fuck 'em all."

There are times that the glow coming from K'zin's basket is as dim as they come, but when enough of the cover is forced back, it can't help but recognize the light. She's gotten obvious enough that he's sorted out something's up. "You got something you want to rant about, 'lida? Go 'head." As if she needs his permission, though leastways he is offering her, in the most direct terms, a sounding board, should she wish it. This isn't about him, and he doesn't seem particularly inclined to participate in such a way that makes it about him.

"No." The negatory is as clipped and hard as they come, Alida refusing to share her ire with anyone else again, given that she feels her trust has been violated, already. Still, there's leftover heat and bitterness within her that feels like it will gag and overwhelm the blonde if she doesn't get at least a little more of it out... "Don't just go with the flow, K'zin. Y'don't have ta' be a bastard, but y'sure don't need ta' be some bullshit shiny paragon uv' supreme virtue. 'cause there's *always* people out there willin' ta manipulate others." Grunt. "YOU be the manipulator, when ya' need ta' be. And when y'don't need ta be... watch out fer it from others. This Weyr's *rife* with political schemes, shady deals...and even a few goody-goodies."

"Right then." K'zin's answer comes, his attention goes back to the task at hand. "Sometimes the flow and your flow are the same things. Sometimes the way to get to what you want is by blending in." The man's eyes fall to the water for a moment and a small smile curls his lips, "Now is the time to convince them of what they want to believe. Now, when we're under their thumb, now when we're never alone. Expectation is a tool. Use it." The smoothness of K'zin's baritone shares a quality with the charming ooze of Rasavyth's mindtouch. "Play it smart." He recommends, before his attention goes back to scrubbing.

How quickly discontent can spread. Alida finds herself nodding at 'K'zin's' take on things, the woman coaxed out of her inner world in favor of potential action. With a push away from the wall, the blonde fords slowly through the water until she's semi-close to the bronzer, better able to speak softly, so they cannot be overheard in this sound-magnified environment. "Just gotta' remember ta' be truthful, *fair* with those precious few who finally *do* manage ta' earn one's trust...backing. 'Cause it's damned tough, if not impossible, ta' go it alone in a situation like this." She not purring the siren's song of the manipulator, Alida instead encouraging her clutchsib with those bits of dark wisdom she's gleaned from her tougher life. "My da' always said, 'Keep yer true friends close... potential enemies closer.' There's a fine line b'tween paranoia 'n caution, Waki, 'n a body's gotta' be constantly cognizant ta' not fall inta' the trap."

He's not all in favor of some of the things his lifemate's thinking right now, but Ilicaeth *is* all for protecting Alida, and making her feel better, as long as it doesn't violate their personal 'codes.' « Alida thinks that some in *our* class could someday be running the Weyr. » The Weyr to him isn't some outside thing, nor a simple concept. It is home/tribe/security/base of operations. A retreat...and a source of power and inspiration...the way a warrior would see it. (To Rasavyth from Ilicaeth)

K'zin doesn't overtly react to Alida's approach. There's no blushing now, no floundering at the nearness of a female, despite his lack of clothes. He listens to her stipulations, and when he finally responds, his voice is quite low. "Friends close and potential enemies closer..." He repeats, "So, Alida, which am I?" His lips quick the smallest smile, but it's not his usual stupid grin, it's a subtle thing, a look that hints at but doesn't confirm amusement.

At Ilicaeth's touch, the shimmering mental ooze he reaches ripples to the sensations of breeze and gritty sands. The sands shimmy this way and that, taken by the playful breeze. Rasavyth's mind is amused. « She is well to think it. But only time will tell if such a thing comes to pass. » His tenor is a purr, soothing and friendly. (To Ilicaeth from Rasavyth)

With that small smile of K'zin's comes a hint of caution flickering within Alida's own gaze, and she finds herself murmuring rather directly, though quite quietly, "Is this Rasavyth/K'zin, 'r just Rasavyth talkin', now?" Oh yes, the blonde's watching, listening intently right now, her observational nature having helped her here both in the past, and now, as well. Still, she *does* finally answer the bronzer's inquiry with a tight-lipped little smirk of her own, and a soft, "Ain't that ultimately up ta' *you*, toots? But I will say that I'm a shelluva' person ta' have as a buddy." Unspoken behind green eyes: and a real bastard to have as an enemy. Wink.

Both of K'zin's hands come out of the water in a 'hold up' gesture. "Are you saying that all this time all I had to do was call you friend and you'd've been one? Last I heard, I was still waiting for--" He glances ceilingwards as he calculates, "-- 5 turns and six months for my probation period to end so I could have a shot at it." A brow quirks then, daring her to admit he might be growing on her faster than her previous friends managed. "Just K'zin, actually." It sounds like the truth. "Let's just say I've been learning."

"No, I'm not sayin' that..." Alida notes almost reflexively, her head shaking a few times, as if to dissuade K'zin from thinking such a thing. "Well, let's say that if ya' keep talkin' and thinkin' *too* much like certain personalities we might know, I ain't ever gonna likely feel secure enough ta' give ya' the treat uv bein' a buddy t'me." Smirk. No, she won't admit it. It sounds like the truth...and, going with her gut, it tends to feel like the truth, so the guard allows herself a gambled, "People around here don't necessarily wanna' admit it...but ya' can't help but seein' that the Weyr's leadership is divided, green as new hay." A cocked brow silently inquires if Waki's seen it, too.

"Alida," K'zin begins quietly, "Might I just point out to you that you, only moments ago, told me to make my own way? If my own way has me behaving differently," He won't admit to any parallels, "Then so be it. How did you put it? Fuck 'em all. All, Alida, does include you if you don't like it." The bronzer's expression is unreadable. "I'm done with people telling me how I need to be." Some of the less mature Waki slips into this comment. "Call me the master of my own destiny. I'm doing as I see fit. I am as I am. Take all of me or none of me, Alida. Friendship doesn't get to pick a person apart and take only the parts they like. For instance, I'm always gonna prattle your ear off when you let me, and you're probably never going to like it. You're not the sweetest peach when it comes to being a friend, but still a peach I'd pick." So he's willing enough for friendship still. "Still, making trouble now isn't going to serve any of us. Wait until we're graduated. Focus just on learning the skills of the trade and then we can trade in those skills when we're in the wings." There's deeper meanings behind what he says than flight and flaming, but he lets them linger unsaid as ghostly promise.

The look of momentary realization and grumpiness upon her features speaks eloquently of Alida realizing what Waki's just told her, the blonde then sobering up and returning to her 'calm' place. "Fair enough, toots..." is murmured to the bronzer being done with it all. Listening to the former Smith once again makes a few of the hairs upon Alida's neck rustle, makes her temporarily wonder what kind of a potential...something's being created by circumstance and will. And then the other weyrling's following words instantly banish that slightly spooky feeling, a low and soft sigh spilling from the guard's lungs. "Again... fair enough. Just..." What? "Jus' hope enough uv' the old Waki ain't gone fer good." And that's as much of an admission of liking him that he'll get. Glare. "Who, *me*? Make trouble?" Yeah, her. Cue a ribald snert and a candid roll of green eyes. "Already made up m'mind about *that*. Fuckin' wring what I can outta' trainin', take care uv' me 'n mine, slowly get a better feel for it all." For the Weyr...for what it might become, someday, with some competent people at the helm.

"Everybody changes." K'zin replies, quoting Quinlys, though he doesn't say so, "During weyrlinghood. Why not me? S'not as though everyone was googoo for how I was before that dragon snagged me. You could barely even tolerate me. See how far I've come?" There's a wink there for her. "Careful, 'lida," He murmurs, his words still having the lilt of playfulness, "Keep calling me toots and I'll think you like me, and I might give you a good reason to bust my nose." This is probably as close to hitting on Alida as K'zin will ever come, and it's a far cry from a real proposition. "If you were playing it smart," The man begins, ducking under the water momentarily before he begins to suds up his hair. "Not saying you're not, mind." No need to get his nose busted again now. "You'd take care of you and yours, and cultivate relationships with those that seem likely to put together something more competent than what's going on. Make allies, Alida. Just because you mightn't like some of them doesn't mean that in the whole lot of us there aren't some that you couldn't bind your dreams with." He shrugs a little, "Some might welcome someone as competent as you to their cause." Ducking under the water, he rinses before resurfacing.

"And sometimes the change ain't a positive one..." the blonde quips back, her riposte hopefully alerting K'zin to the fact that losing too much of what makes a person themself isn't a good thing. Well, if they were decent, anyway. "Like I said, gotta' observe yerself, too. Balance." Because *she's* so balanced, yeah. For that very half-assed tease of his, the bronzer gets a light, non-jarring little smack upside his head with the flats of the blonde's fingers, unless he sees it coming. "Fuckin' dink." Snerk. And then there's talk of making allies with people who are potentially on her black list...and the headstrong woman balks, her features pinching up some while a dark look floods her eyes. "*I'm* not politic. Mebee a few...but not many." A sudden pursing of lips and inward-turning of eyes for a few moments then presages her thoughtful, "But I just *might* be able ta' let my dislike...slide some." Like she has been doing with Sabella...more eyerolling and ignoring the greenie instead of actively taking verbal or physical swipes at her. "Apparently, I'm just too much uv' a fuckin' firecracker sometimes ta' be worth some people's effort." Scathing, that.

Her training must be paying off (slowly but surely!) because he anticipates the smack and leans far enough out of its way to avoid it. To the idea that change isn't always positive, he gives a little shrug, "Positive or negative is in the eye of the beholder. It's sometimes all a matter of perspective. Stand on your head sometime and see how the world looks different." He suggests. "Fuck 'em." K'zin responds to her words about people's view of firecrackers. He might reach out to make a comradely gesture, but here when clothes are so few, it seems safer not. "Seems to me that you have good enough allies to make, if you'll only see us that way." Us doesn't mean he and Rasavyth, though the dragon is certainly included. It means the few she's made bonds with, though she won't deign to call them friendships. "Take the leap, 'lida." There's a moment of pensive silence, but not hesitation before he adds. "'Lida, Ras and I are going to be great. We are going to do great things." His voice rings softly with certainty. "If you're ever wanting to take a leap of faith, you can throw your lot in with us." He sees her value, even if others mightn't.

Now *that* kind of reaction hasn't been seen in Waki much before now, and with his quick avoidance of her hand comes a slender smirk and Alida's low, "Apparently yer' learnin'." She's minorly pleased...until a firm shake of her wet head greets the bronzer's next words. "No." Firm, unyielding. "Sometime positive 'r negative is readily apparent, and *not* in the eye." What, she has a few morals and ethics, still...after all she's been through? And then the other weyrling is appealing to her more riotous side, and the bluie grins rakishly, echoing her clutchsib: "Fuck 'em." Yep, best to keep even comradely touchy-feely away from the cantankerous blonde when she's vulnerable. A small lift of chin and vague quirk of head have her listening to Waki again, some caution creeping to the fore when he speaks in such a way about taking the plunge. She's trying to make her words come out decently, and spending some time in framing them. "K'zin..." Not Waki. "...Word uv great things is nice 'n all...but I need more 'n that ta go on." Level greens meet with browns, not flinching away. "I hitched my star ta' the Guard...'n they let me down." Maybe she did to them, too, but that's neither here nor there anymore. "Hitched enough uv it ta' this dragonrider thing..." And look at how she's been let down, again...shown in the bitter twist of lips. "Gimme somethin'...tangible. A plan...plans. Outlines. I can't deal with just hope 'n dreams, feelings anymore." Behind every bitter cynic is a disappointed idealist.

"I told you I've been learning." K'zin answers, making a rather childish face at her. "Maybe you need your ears checked." Playfulness is there and gone again, taking on the more serious topic. "Alida, here's the thing..." He's done washing now, and he does edge just a little closer, not threateningly, just to increase their ability to speak without any prying ears. "Whether you see the change as positive or negative, whether you think I might be losing myself as some others think I might, think about this: a dragon brings out what is already within you. This is me... Just a stronger, better, smarter side. And I'm only going to becomes more in time. This is the time to pick your pony, to ante up, those that take the greatest risks reap the greatest rewards. I tripled my worth in one single bet." K'zin's talk has gone from the vague and deep to the more solid, "Watch if you like, decide later if you like, but the sooner you get in, the more... intimate our relationship will be." He doesn't mean sex. His meaning is plain: if Alida is his first ally, she gets in on the ground floor and goes with him from the time that he is nothing. If she joins later... well, that will be a lot of history lost. And if not at all? Then so be it. "We're not the guard." He comments low. "Compare redfruit to orange all day and you'll never trust another. Want to be something? Don't ask me to make the plan for you. Ask me to meld your plan with mine." He-- or he's got one, that's for certain.

For such a fiery person, Alida sure can be hesitant to commit. Must come from her being disappointed, left behind too much. After they're both done playing with one another - with those expressions of childlike remonstration and response to such - after K'zin's spoken at length on the subject of transformation and power...she's still fence-sitting...something Jo accused her of last night. Again, that odd feeling of prickling hairs at the base of her neck happen, and the cautious woman finds herself unconsciously smoothing them down with one of her hands. Finally, "I can't be anything other than who, what I am." Firm eye contact is awarded once more to the once-uncertain young man not two feet from her. "I'm in...but remember, K'zin...I have lines." Firm and certain lines they are, drawn in the rock...uncrossable. Unspoken: Do not *ever* ask me to step over them, or bad shit will happen.

"And I'd never ask you to cross them." As Rasavyth would point out, and possibly is in K'zin's head, you use people for what they can do and are willing to do, for their strengths. Trying to go against their nature is a waste of effort; just find someone else. K'zin's face is quite serious as he delivers the phrase, however. "Bear in mind that your lines are your lines, and mine are mine. You may always question or advise, but respect that we each are who we are and ultimately only have ourselves to answer to." See? He's not unreasonable. They're individual agents, united for a cause. "We'll discuss, at length, what goals you should most like to pursue, 'lida. You and Ilicaeth," For K'zin's partnership demands the recognition that Alida's lifemate might have goals different from her own and should also be accounted for. "But now is not the moment and here is not the place." He extends a hand, "Do you clasp on things at Pars or simply let them be stated in words?" It's easy to tell he's readying for a departure, but wishes to give this accord its due respect.

She's too jaded - even at this young age - to miss that there's things unspoken behind K'zin's words, and for a moment, Alida bristles internally, her green eyes firing to witchfire for some seconds, then regaining their coolness. "Just remember... plans set at *major* crosspurposes often go awry." The first casualty of the battle is the plan. "*We* can't afford ta' make the mistakes we see happenin' around us, here." The factions within factions, the disjointedness. "We keep lines uv' contact open between us, keep each other apprised uv' important shit...and we do *not* dick around with things very important to us." Like lifemates. A quick nod at the suggestion of better times and places for more talk to happen later, and then blonde finds herself... looking at Waki's extended hand for a moment, her eyes climbing along it to the face of the young man she was secretly enjoying getting to know. Actions speak louder than words, most times, and with a blaze of passion that characterizes the blonde, her own hand lifts, clasps firmly about K'zin's forearm in a gesture given from one warrior to another...not the palm-to-palm meeting so often favored by other folk. Here's to good intentions.

The rest of what transpires is mundane. To tell of it would detract from the significance of this discussion. Safe to say that nothing else of especial importance occurred between them, and each went about their business as though nothing in the world had changed even one bit. If one were to look at the tapestry of fate, however... the threads have changed.