Difference between revisions of "Logs:First Thoughts"

For those who Stood for Elaruth and Bijedth's clutch, this is likely not a new experience; though, those that are sharply observant may notice that it seems that the junior weyrwoman has chosen to start allowing the Candidates to touch the eggs rather early. There is still a softness to their shells, a need to be very, very delicate. The large, bronzey queen isn't still, but she has confined her anxious pacing to the back wall of the cavern, away from where an assistant weyrlingmaster leads the Candidates in from the galleries to the sands, left only as Lilah steps forward to take them and actually offer the permission, "You may step onto the Sands. Walk, look, touch only your fingertips to these eggs." Her dark gaze pins someone in the crowd, Kaelige, as if expecting some smart remark before she corrects, "And that doesn't mean to poke them."

And then there are those just settling into this whole thing. Like Isidro, who comes out onto the sands with his hands in his pockets, simultaneously trying to look completely nonchalant and gawking. Not just at the eggs--but they're so close! They're so huge!--but at the stands above, at the queen back there, at Lilah. Right, gawking at weyrwomen, probably not a good idea. The look the eggs get after instructions is considerably more reserved than its predecessor. "It's not going to... hurt them or anything?"

There's one person that didn't come in with the candidates and hasn't had a white knot of her own or set foot into the candidate barracks as of yet that anyone could be aware of. But Paislie is here right now. She doesn't necessarily looks like she belongs, though she often doesn't even when she does, but she's with Lilah, so she must be here with some sort of permission. She doesn't move off when the rest of them offered the chance, however. She stays near her sister.

Shuffling her way from the back of the crowd is a very reluctant Eadgyd, who's doing a remarkable job of focusing on individual granules of sand rather than on anything egg or dragon-shaped. The girl has her arms crossed and a bit of a scowl on her face, her gaze darting up just once to snap from Lilah to Isidro. "What if we're careful but something still happens?" is muttered almost under her breath. That's probably the part where Eliyaveith would eat them.

Kaelige takes the focus of attention with the acceptance and flourish which could be expected of him, a bow of his head and a slight sweep of hand given as both acknowledgement of the instruction and in greeting to the gold upon the Sands. It may even be noted that he has his hood down, his black hair messy but free and his bluegreen gaze unshadowed as he watches the weyrwoman and, assumably, listens to her. Whether it be out of respect or because he just doesn't have a good quip on the tip of his tongue, the darkly garbed teen is quiet- for now- as his boots sink into the Sands that feel all too familiar. The question from Ead doesn't earn a glance, but perhaps it's the cause of his slowly growing grin.

Eliyaveith's whirling, anxious gaze fixes on Eadgyd for a moment after that mutter, all the more noticeable as her pacing stops abruptly with it, almost as if the queen could hear her all the way across the sands and the chatter of the other Candidates. Perhaps she can; after all, do any of them really know that much about dragons and their hearing? "They are still hardening, and they can be hurt. But you will not," is not a reassurance to Isidro at his question, but a warning on the goldrider's part. "Go, get familiar with them. For all we know, the dragonets inside may be taking this time to find the right person--." But, Lilah cuts herself off on that topic, her lips pressing together. As the Candidates move onto the sands, she distracts herself with her sister's presence nearby, turning to her to offer a low murmur of, "You should join them. At least go touch the gold."

Not a reassurance: Duly noted. Isidro is not reassured. His approach to the eggs is a very wary one, and even getting within arm's reach may be a bit beyond his comfort level just now, but at least he's getting a closer look at them. And, along the way, peering past at Paislie, evidently in a very alliterative fashion. The look doesn't translate to a direct greeting. Instead, a bit of a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth as he glances over at Eadgyd's scowl. "Having second thoughts yet?" Paislie's hazel eyes flicker over the various candidates on the sands before glancing at Lilah. She seems uncomfortable, but that's kind of standard practice when the younger redhead is around a larger group of people. "Are you sure it's okay?" she asks as though she's not entirely sure the clutchmother's rider has this sort of authority even as her eyes search out the egg with the golden sheen.

Eadgyd's shifting gaze dares to alight on the gold for just a moment, and... no. Could it? She darts a glance to her fellow candidates before squaring her shoulders. It was just coincidence, that timing. Nothing more. The fact that Kaelige is within hearing distance has her 'accidentally' scuffing her boot in the sand, sending a very small spray of sand in his direction. Something that could be easily dismissed as a trip for a misstep rather than a deliberate move. "I'm not sure I ever had first thoughts," she admits dryly to Isidro. "Who's going first, then?" A thought seems to occur to her then, and rather than let Kaelige be the first to lay a hand on one of those shells, the brunette steps around the group and moves to lay fingertips upon the one with a shell like a broken mirror.

"Of course it's ok, and Eliyaveith doesn't mind." A pause, as Lilah glances to that anxious, giant form, before she adds with a hint of dryly, "Well, you. Go, please." And with that, she abandons her sister to bond with those Candidates touching eggs, retreating across the sand towards Eliyaveith to offer her assurances. Though, those assurances fall into something that looks more like rider and dragon anxiously watching together, rather than anything like the obvious affection of other dragonriding pairs.

There's a strange pause in Kaelige's step as he separates himself from the other candidates. It seems well-timed with Eadgyd's question about who would jump in first, though he gives her no direct answer. His attention strays away from the junior weyrwoman. He sighs, the heavy exhale a thought-heavied thing. Even the small spray of sand appears to be missed or ignored. His smugness seems to have been left in the galleries for a moment, since as the usually hooded boy arrives at the first egg with his earlier pause relinquished, there's nothing suspicious about his expression. Serious, yes, and focused. All apparently foreign concepts have found him in the current time. One would think this would be no different than when he approached Elaruth's clutch, but he doesn't appear to be writing it off as repetitively mundane. He doesn't touch the Picking a Path egg even as he stands before it- the one that had drawn his attention since the clutch had first touched the sands. "Well if you didn't have first thoughts, what are they now?" His voice finally comes, though he doesn't look at either of the two talking before.

"Not--" Not Isidro, no. "--me." Relief in it, when Eadgyd breaks the proverbial ice. But it still takes Isidro a bit to come around to that level of proximity. He wanders rather than settling in any particular spot, like something's just going to jump out as the right place to be, but it doesn't seem to be forthcoming. "This is all so strange. So we just sit around with them? They don't do anything. I don't get it. Why even let us near them, if it's a risk?" This, however, is phrased in tones clearly too quiet to be intended for Lilah, lest they be considered Official Questions.

Paislie looks after her sister for an anxious moment. She'd probably fit right in with the goldpair's anxiety, but she doesn't try to follow. She stands there by herself for several moments, hands clasped in front of her while she looks at the real candidates. Then she finally starts to move, slowly but deliberately, toward the gold egg. It's almost as if she expects someone else to say something about her path or perhaps her being here at all.

Eadgyd's fingertips run along the Broken Mirror Egg's shell, tracing the false fissures with a whisper of a touch. While curiosity might beg her to test just how much give is still in those slightly soft shells, the queen in the background offers an equally persuasive reason to not make that mistake. "I've jumped straight to third and fourth thoughts, where I reconsider reconsidering, and then reconsider again," she hisses in Kaelige's direction, followed up by a sharp smirk. She removes her hand from the shell for a moment when that urge to poke and prod becomes too strong. "We're meant to bond or something, I think," she offers to Isidro in a low tone, "I don't know."

"Bonding." Right. And here Isidro is, flitting about. A+ great at commitment. It's enough of a reminder to at least pick one, to make a glancing contact of fingers, but just a glancing one, fingers seeming to recoil immediately like even that might have been too much. The nerves, they are obvious. "Is that what happened, do you think? I mean, the last time? Not enough bonding?" Thus, the early visiting. Smart cookie. Eventually. "Grown dragons don't seem so fragile."

There's a good chance that Paislie is eavesdropping on Isidro and anyone who will answer his questions, considering that she keeps glancing in that direction as she finally reaches her destination. The egg, however, earns her focus for the few moments it takes her to reach out, hesitate with a deep breath, and then just barely brush her fingertips against the unhardened shell as she lets the breath out again.

Kaelige removes his gloves slowly and stuffs them into a pocket on the side of his pants beneath the white knot attached at his hip. He places his hand on the softer shell of the Pick a Path egg, following the dark smudges, the shadowy curves of color. He does have a gentleness for this it seems, though the motions look unnatural. "Indecisive because of fear?" Is said to Ead, the thoughtful seriousness of before faded. When another candidate moves beside him to take his own turn, he leaves it behind to seek another- not that there's utterly far to go. Either because his smugness found him again or because he's out of that heavy bank of thoughts he'd been in, his next stop is near Paislie. Near the.. gold egg? Why? "It's about time you came out on the Sands." He prods, but lightly, intending to titrate his annoyance to be just enough to pick at her and no more. "I think I would be great on a gold, don't you?" As if he intends to touch the golden shell for more than just an offer of respect.

"I don't think anyone knows, and I don't think they ever will," is Eadgyd's frank answer to Isidro after her fingertips leave that first shell. She doesn't seem overly eager to attend another. She wanders past one, then another, brushing past Kaelige long enough to growl, "I'm not scared of anything." And then she's seeking another shell to touch with gentle fingertips. A curious glance is cast in Paislie's direction, but the other girl's presence is generally accepted without question - Lilah allowed her here, after all. "You going to be one of us, then," she directs to the other girl after a moment, just loud enough to be heard.

The dark-haired girl can have the fortitude for several of them, apparently; Isidro chimes in with, "I'm terrified," although he sounds more cheerful about this admission than he has any right to be. Maybe saying it out loud lightens the load. While he's made physical contact, apparently he's still no good at lingering. Another egg, another. What's he hoping, that one of them will decide to hatch right now, as soon as he makes contact? "Shh. She's wild, if you get too close she'll blink off between and we'll never see her again."

Apparently if Kaelige wants to touch the gold egg, Paislie will give him a wide enough berth to do so. As he comes closer, she moves away, not unlike a shy, distrustful runner who needs to maintain a personal bubble. She doesn't move off to other eggs, though, instead watching the boy uncertainly. Is she actually supposed to answer his question? Eadgyd's seems more reasonable, but Paislie's response is still timid. "I don't know. Maybe." Isidro earns a glance, too, but Kaelige is closer so part of her attention stays on him.

"Terrified of?" Kaelige entertains the answer from Isidro, not entirely familiar with him quiet yet. "You think you won't walk off the Sands in one piece?" It's a joke, but not really. A chuckle follows it, dark in its very short duration. To Eadgyd, "Well?" He swings a hand out, as if demonstrating the clutch to her for a first time, "If you aren't afraid of anything, there's no reason not to Stand. Nothing to reconsider." His grin, wide, shortens but lingers as he returns his attention to Paislie. He holds his distance from her, the boy known as a stablehand to the Weyr from the day he arrived her, not all unfamiliar with the concept of pressure. But also with waiting out the most fearful runner for their curiosity to win out. "You first." He offers quietly, with one hand motioning her attention back towards the golden shell.

A low growl catches in Eliyaveith's throat as Kaelige's hand swings out, just a brief, distant warning to the Candidate that she pins with her whirling gaze. (Sudden movements that involve wide gestures around the eggs, apparently, are not appreciated.)

"Come on, then." If that's meant to be Eadgyd's form of encouragement for Paislie, it's rather abrupt. But for a girl likewise familiar with skittish runners, that gentle touch doesn't seem to extend to people. "They've got the rest of us, you might as well. If I can do it, you can do it. All of that." Her shoulders lift in a slight shrug as she moves to press fingertips to yet another shell, gliding across the surface for a few moments before withdrawing. A sharp look is sent toward Kaelige as she pulls away. "And how do you figure that, then? Wanting a different life for myself has nothing to do with fear. Not everyone wants to be a dragonrider." Her eyes narrow. "Unlike you. For a good reason, I'm sure."

"Pretty sure the eggs aren't that dangerous just now." Wait, walking off the sands later? Isidro hasn't even gotten past being terrified of just this very moment, apparently. But this seems to create enough courage to actually linger at one egg for a few moments, to frown at it with heavy brow furrowed in concentration. "I think riders get a pretty good deal, all things considered. Not as sure about the bits that come between here and there. I like kids, but even completely normal-sized babies kind of freak me out. You know?"

Since she's not a runner, Paislie can probably wait out Kaelige longer than any reasonable person would be willing to bother with her. A girl needs some talents, after all. She gives Eliyaveith a nervous glance, then shakes her head at Kaelige. "I touched her already. Go ahead." To Eadgyd, she adds, "There's still time." Granted, most people dragging their feet about Standing for the eggs aren't out here mingling with them right now. "What do you mean a good deal?" she asks Isidro, starting to drift around closer to him, but mostly away from Kaelige and the gold egg.

Kaelige's bluegreens shift immediately towards Eliyaveith at the growl, keeping his current teasing expression given that the warning is brief, but reclaiming his arm to his side in withdraw of his further expressive gestures. "Are you afraid of being a dragonrider? Or afraid of losing what you might have had in a different life?" He asks, his sidelong glance straying to Eadgyd for only a moment to see her expression before returning to Paislie. His current target. But his words continue on to Ead, "All my reasons are good." He doesn't confirm nor deny her assessment of his desires. His ungloved hand only briefly passes over the golden shell- indeed pursuing the respectful greeting than becoming acquainted with it- before he takes a step back and turns slowly. "You should spend more time with it. There's no rush until she kicks us out." Indicating the Queen with word alone this time and no gesture- he can learn! Fingers pass onto the shell of the Wrapping of Risk egg, palm touching after as if to follow the hues stroked in forms of wrinkles.

Is that almost a low rumble of approval from the queen in Kaelige's direction, as he keeps from that gesture and to words only? It does seem as if Eliyaveith approves, however, anxious she must be about them still so near her still hardening eggs.

"No, it's their mother you have to watch out for," Eadgyd tells Isidro with a nod in the queen's direction. One of them has already incurred her ire it seems, if only for that short moment. She circles back the way she came, lightly skimming fingers across the shells of those eggs which aren't currently occupied. Though she doesn't touch them all - the golden egg in particular is avoided - she does come back to those she finds particularly intriguing. "There's still time, but you're making yourself a stranger to the rest of the potential weyrlings this way. They put us all together for a reason." This assessment is leveled in Paislie's direction with an even stare and a flat tone. But even without any passion behind it, there's a hint of warning. This tone darkens as her eyes roll and shift to fix on Kaelige. "Either listen to what I say, or shut up," she growls before forcing her gaze back toward the eggs.

While Isidro lingers beside that egg, he draws his hand away to tick some things off on his fingers. "Interval. Space to yourself. Pretty much do what you like in your free time. Go literally anywhere you want in the world. Absent any significant chance of marrying a Lord Holder and spending the rest of my days lounging around eating pastries..." Big smile. Can anyone imagine him lounging around getting fat on carbohydrates? It would be a stretch. He doesn't respond to Eadgyd's caution directly, except with a glance over at the queen in question, but does tack more kindly onto her comment to Paislie: "We don't bite." It would be better if he could learn to say that without showing so many teeth.

There's no indication that Paislie is going to go back to the egg that she was touching before, and she doesn't seem all that interested in touching any of the other ones now that she's trying very hard not to let Eadgyd's words cause visible tears. She's only having limited success, swallowing the knot of emotion in her throat, but, fortunately, something Isidro says draws her attention toward him. It's evidently a suitable distraction from crying in front of the present candidates. "You think that's enough to make the rest of it worthwhile?"

"Flying sweeps at all sharding hours of the day, writing plans, going to meetings, doing drills for hours.." Kaelige's voice trails after Isidro's description of the great rider life, though it's of course for little benefit to Paislie. Apparently he's aware of having to do work following Impression, even if he's shown no drive to do it. But he wouldn't make comments beyond that, and Eadgyd's sharp retort receives nothing more than a smirk and a small shake of his head. He doesn't even look at her, curiosity straying from the next egg he's come to- the Oracle egg- back to Paislie as he monitors her sudden near-breech of emotions. A small sigh. To Ead, then, "If I recall correctly," He starts, "Candidates are brought in up until the hour the first breaks shell. And I don't even think I know that guy." That comment indicating Isidro, though lacks any seriousness to show if he means it or not.

Eadgyd looks more annoyed than repentant at what appears to be a potentially emotional reaction from Paislie. "That's right," she grunts in Kaelige's direction. "Freedom, or a life spent doing drills. It's not exactly shocking that someone would have doubts." Of course, freedom might not actually be as free as she'd like to think. The girl has found her way back to the seemingly fractured shell of the Broken Mirror Egg, tracing over those dark lines once again. "I never said they weren't." She gives Kaelige a 'really?' look and a roll of her pale eyes. "But if you're here, why not join the rest of the group? Even if you don't want to live in the barracks, doing chores with people would be a start. Is it better to take the knot on hatching day and end up with not only a voice in your head but living in a room full of strangers?"

It isn't as if Paislie is looking to hide behind someone's skirts, likely, but if she were, the junior weyrwoman's (metaphorical) skirts likely wouldn't be the worst choice. Because as soon as Lilah catches her sister looking upset, it brings the goldrider across the sands towards the Candidates just in time to answer Eadgyd for her with a dry, "My sister's choices are her own, Candidate, just as yours are. Or do you have a problem with them?" Her dark gaze settles in a weighted study on the young woman, taking her in, before that gaze sweeps away to the rest of the Candidates on the sands. "That is enough for today. You are dismissed." That, clearly, doesn't include Paislie, though.

"Sweeps don't sound like my favorite way to spend time, but if the things you had to do every day were fun, they wouldn't be called 'work'," Isidro observes drily to Kaelige. "Possibly worse than washing dishes. Probably better than picking cotton." An overly-dramatic lamenting sigh follows. "Someone finds out a way that I can opt out of working for the rest of my life, of course, I'm all ears." The dismissal, under the circumstances, leaves him blinking for a moment, but then he straightens up and gives the eggs one more look-over. And Paislie, too. An answer, finally: "Yeah. Maybe. I don't know. But... probably." Then he's on his way back off the sands.

"For one who can't even make up her own mind, you're quick to make up someone else's." Is Kaelige's low, wry response to Eadgyd despite the look she throws him, but before he can add anything of more significant (or cocky) note, Lilah's voice curtails him. He had touched a few other eggs in passing, but once the clear-cut dismissal is given... Well, he does reroute his direction towards the exit, towards and perhaps past the junior weyrwoman. A hand shifts his knot out of the way to dig in a pocket, pull out his gloves and pull them on with fingers flexing to make them snug again. He would step off the Sands, but linger in the warmed stone of the galleries.

Paislie is, perhaps, completely willing to hide behind her sister's metaphorical skirts. When Lilah comes back over toward them, the younger redhead gravitates toward her in turn. It's safe there. She doesn't say anything to the goldrider just yet, avoiding looking at any of the candidates now and waiting until they're mostly taking their leave to offer quietly, "It's okay," to Lilah.

Oops. Eadgyd looks only moderately flustered when Lilah approaches her, though her gaze does drop immediately to the egg at her fingertips rather than meeting the other woman's eyes. "No one has tried to stop Dee from recruiting any person of age she comes across," Eadgyd comments in a quietly dry tone, adding, "If I'm at fault for commenting on another's choices, you should likely be talking to half the candidates, ma'am." They're an opinionated lot, these. She pulls her hand away from the egg and lifts her chin just slightly. Her gaze remains shy of Lilah's, however her eyes do dart to the side to glare at Kaelige for just a moment. "I was suggesting to your sister that she might be more comfortable getting to know us. It wasn't an insult, nor is that an offensive statement. It's not even pressure." There's clearly more that she wishes to say, but the girl bites her tongue and steps back. "Thank you, ma'am." And with a little bow, the candidate makes a swift retreat from the sands. All that annoyance has to go somewhere, and a certain hooded candidate is probably her target.

Lilah's brow curves upwards at that tidbit of gossip about Dee, or perhaps for the whole Candidate class, but she doesn't interrupt the younger woman's words. Once Eadgyd has said her piece (or at least, as much as she dares), the goldrider only tips a chin in a nod. She doesn't notice Kaelige lingering in the galleries, either, as she turns back to her sister once the sands are clear, meeting that reassurance with a quiet, "But are you?" Her lips twist into a frown, but she doesn't wait to hear a response, not before she sighs out, "Eliyaveith needs to check over the eggs. We may as well help." That will be a process in itself, indeed.