Logs:Not Broken
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| RL Date: 14 June, 2010 |
| Who: K'del, Milani |
| Type: [[Concept:{{{type}}}|{{{type}}}]] |
| What: K'del breaks the news to Milani. |
| Where: K'del's Weyr, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day {{{day}}}, Month {{{month}}}, Turn {{{turn}}} ({{{IP}}} {{{IP2}}}) |
| Mentions: Avey/Mentions |
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| K'del's Weyr, High Reaches Weyr Rank certainly has its privileges, and among them are amply appointed apartments. The short flight of stairs from the Weyrleader's Complex opens up into the larger of two chambers, formally decorated and clearly designed to cater as much to important guests as the occupant's personal living. Old, but obviously expensive, llama wool rugs dyed blue-and-black cover the stone floor, leading towards the second chamber, the stairs, and the rush-filled dragon couch and ledge beyond it. A formal seating arrangement - a sofa and chairs, all blue-and-black - sits around a large, tiled fireplace, whilst along the other wall, a finely made, if now somewhat antique, desk sits between a bookshelf and a tall cupboard to which tack-hooks have been attached, riding gear arranged neatly inside. Two tapestries hung from the high walls depict overdone splendour for High Reaches Weyr, one a long view of the snow-covered bowl, and the other a hazy impressionist piece of dragons flaming over a springtime countryside. The inner weyr, made up of a sleeping cavern and a private bathing area, is smaller and cosier and distinctly less ostentatious. An oversized wooden sleigh bed fills much of the space, the mattress piled high with overstuffed down pillows and comforter, their covers dyed in varying shades of navy blue, light blue and bronze. There's a nightstand on either side, both with reading lamps, and against one of the other walls, a tall, heavy wardrobe made from a dark wood that matches the bed. The bathing area is part of the same cavern, a folding screen shielding the toilet and slightly raised, double-sized bathtub built into the stone, and a small shelf holding toiletries, shaving equipment, and clean towels. Avey's little piece of news, and the drinks-and-fun that followed it finally left K'del alone to his thoughts probably an hour or two ago. Evening has turned towards night, by now, and the bronzerider has settled on the couch, legs stretched out so that his feet hang over the far end, his head turned towards the flames burning steadily in the adjacent hearth. Though clothed, there's still a sense of undress about him, his shirt not quite buttoned right, his belt still sitting on the floor beside him. He looks pensive, staring at the fire as though it might hold all the answers he seeks. The sound of boots stomping in the entryway announces Milani, snow falling off of footwear. A moment later, a pink-cheeked headwoman appears, coat-less, having hung the garment up neatly in the entryway and barefoot too, socks and boots likewise left behind. "Hello!" she greets brightly and obliviously, one hand lifting to pull the pins out of her hair, let long locks fall in curling waves down her back and rumples fingers throughh it. "Ugh, it was all cataloguing today. You wouldn't believe some of the things people have tucked away in their quarters." That pensive expression on K'del's face finally registers though and Milani comes over to him, knees down at his feet, one hand resting on his knee. Hairpins are abandoned to the low table and she looks up at the Weyrleader curiously. "Kas?" It's not - probably - that K'del completely fails to notice Milani's entrance, but even so, it isn't until her hand rests on his knee and she asks his name that he actually turns away from the hearth to meet her gaze, with an awkward little smile. "Hey," he says, lifting both arms in an enticement to draw her close. "Sorry, I was miles away. C'mere and give me a kiss." There's obviously still something on his mind, but as he speaks, he banishes the pensiveness, and pushes that smile into something broader, brighter. "Miles and miles, hm?" Milani says with a laugh and pushes up onto her knees and from there into the circle of his arms, hand trailing affectionately along his leg then leaving it behind so her arms go around his neck. The kiss when it comes, lingers a little, as affectionate as her touch. "Long day?" the headwoman asks next, head cocked to the side, legs comfortably draped across his lap. K'del's arms wrap snugly around Milani as she joins him, and he's more than happy, it seems, to linger over that kiss, to enjoy it for as long as it will last. Her question draws that funny little smile on his face again, though, and he takes a breath before he answers. "Sort of. Mostly-- um. You know Avey? Greenrider, transferred from Ista couple of turns back?" Milani's fingers curl up into K'del's hair, playing wit the little curls at the nape of his neck, a little quirk to one brow answering that strange smile. "Mmhm. Yeah, offered her some help with moving. Yet again. She goes through a lot of boyfriends and moves out every time it doesn't work out it seems," is the headwoman's assessment. "Is she okay?" "That's her," agrees K'del, somehow amused by some part of that description of the greenrider, though he doesn't specify why. His fingers strike lightly at her back, then one hand disengages and lifts, so that he can run it down her cheek. "No, no, she's fine. Mostly. Just-- pregnant." It takes him a few moments to get that out. "And it's mine. And--" And other stuff, only he doesn't manage to get into the rest of that just yet, apparently, instead pausing so that he can watch Milani's reaction, his own expression obviously torn between multiple emotions. That touch to her cheek sees Milani leaning into his hand a little, smiling. The rest of K'del's words though slowly fade that smile as realization dawns and the headwoman goes still for a moment, eyes sliding away from his. Her hand lifts and gently removes his hand from her cheek, though she keeps her fingers curled around his. Deep breath in, another out. Softly: "Oh." Another silence follows and there's a visible struggle on Milani's face as she swallows down her own conflicting emotions. "Shells ... well. At least we know you're not broken!" she finally musters with a too-bright laugh. K'del's fingers make an attempt to twine through hers - the only move he makes, in the seconds that follow his revelation. He takes a few deep breaths, careful, his gaze somehow imploring. Finally; "Right? So-- that's good news. I guess. I just-- I wish it was you. I wish we were cuddling here, celebrating, unable to stop grinning." He takes another breath, then, before adding, "She doesn't want to keep it. And I can't-- the thought of it makes me feel sick. It's not how it was all supposed to go." All of that makes Milani's brows crinkle up and she leans in to kiss him abruptly, then tucks her head down to his shoulder. "Well I guess it just means that Madilla was right. It's been too soon for me," the headwoman says in a level-enough voice. "It'll happen when it's meant to happen." Faith in her voice. She goes quiet and still again at what K'del relates. "Shells ...." she murmurs after a while. "I -- it's not my business Kas, it's not. But I hope she doesn't --" that's left hanging. K'del's breath gets let out, long and somehow relieved, as he tucks his arms back around the Headwoman, the broken hand and the whole one holding her tight. "Right," he gets out, then. "Just have to keep on trying, right? And it'll happen, when it does. It /will/ happen." Answering that gives him time before he needs to add, "Never had a problem with people doing it, before. Never. But now--" that it's his? He swallows. "Asked her to think about it. But. Can't force her. That's not right. Not-- saw how it made Kash feel. /But/." "I know," Milani says in a small voice. "I did it three times altogether and that last time ..." she trails off and burrows her nose into his collar. "I couldn't do it again. And if she's far enough along ... it's just ... it's dangerous and it hurts," the headwoman says softly. "It's such a bad pain. And there's regrets and --" she stops right there, arm tightening around his neck. "Can't force anyone, but sometimes I think we think it's just too easy a thing to do in Weyrs." Eyes closing, one of K'del's hand lifts to rest on the back of Milani's head as she burrows like that. He has to swallow before he can speak, his voice kept low with barely restrained emotion. "Can't even begin to imagine," he says. "Don't really want to. It-- just, I don't know. /So/ glad you won't have to do it again." More thoughtful is his added, "Dunno what's worse. People ending up with more children than they can cope with, physically and emotionally, or people just-- throwing them away. Wish it were somewhere between. People caring more about not getting themselves pregnant in the first place." "Even when you're careful, sometimes you screw up," is Milani's muffled remark on that subject. "And you have to be able to have a backup in those cases," she says quietly. "I think though that yeah, a balance between the two, it's important. And well ... in between this baby, when he or she manages to get you know, made, and the next one, I need to ask Madilla about something better to use, than just counting, Mum's special oil and a hop Between. None of those are you know, good enough." K'del's arms tighten just slightly at Milani's comment on 'the next one', though it could just as easily be a reaction to this new (for him) confidence that there will be a this baby. Either way, he doesn't specify. Silent for a few more moments, after Milani stops speaking, he agrees, "That would be-- better. Just to know that it's not going to happen sooner than you want. Control, I guess. Being able to make sure of it." Beat. "I wonder if Avey would've told me, at all, if she hadn't run into me in the caverns. Whether that would've been better, if she /is/ going to go ahead with it." Tilting her head back, Milani chews on her lower lip a little. "I ... don't know her well enough to guess at that. I just hope that it all works out, Kas. I do," the headwoman says sincerely and lets out a breath, runs her hand through his hair fondly again. "Do you ... want to take a little break from all the trying? Maybe we've been trying too hard," she says with a little laugh. "So do I," is K'del's firm agreement; he manages a little smile for it, too, one that - perhaps - is more confident than he actually feels. Her question has his head tipping thoughtfully to one side, followed, a few moments later, with a nod. "Maybe-- that's for the best. Just a little break. Just-- taking it easier for a bit, maybe? Just see what happens. Relax." He seems to be talking to himself as much as to Milani, consideringly. Milani's hand keeps moving through his hair gently and she nods just once. "A little easy sounds like a good idea. I mean, at least we both know that we /can/ so there's really nothing to worry about," the headwoman says gamely. "And relaxing sounds nice. Maybe we can even run away for a day and go lounge around and relax on the beach before Turnover." "Hand gets out of the plaster next seven-- we should go after that," says K'del, firmly, obviously pleased with this idea. He leans in to seek out a kiss, letting it linger in a laid-back kind of fashion before, drawing back, he adds, "You're right. Now that we /know/-- feels like there's less pressure to make it happen immediately, I guess. Want it, though. A lot. /Our/ baby." "Sounds like a plan then," Milani says gaily enough and leans into that kiss in like fashion, fingers getting all tangled up in his curls. "Hmm. If you keep kissing me like that though, I don't know if I can resist you," she teases him with real mischief in her eyes this time. His last though, softens her smile and one of her hands drops from around his neck, lifts to cradle his cheek gently. "Me too, Kas," she says quietly and her bottom lip tucks in for a moment then she says steadily: "I want us to be a family." K'del is all innocence, in expression, as Milani teases him like that - all innocence, that is, except for the wink he aims at her. What he answers, verbally, though, is done so more seriously, even solemn. "I do, too. Want it more than I could've believed, you know? Once upon a time. Love you." Milani's smile goes wide and lovely in answer to his words and her arms tighten around his neck again. "I know. I love you too." She stays there for a little bit, then lean back enough to be able to see his face again. "I didn't think we'd wind up here together either," Milani offers over candidly. "Buuut, I'm glad it's worked out this way." She snuggles in comfortably against his side, one hand seeking out his good one to thread fingers through. "Whatever else happens, we've always got each other," she declares and tilts her head down to his shoulder. "Not exactly the outcome I anticipated, after that sixteenth turnday mattress delivery," grins K'del. "Wouldn't change it for the world, though. No." His fingers are more than happy to twine through hers, while the other set rest gently around her. Quietly, he adds, then, "Always. You, and me, and a blue-eyed kid or two. Family." Milani laughs at that remark. "That was an /awful/ lot of fun, wasn't it? And right ... I thought it'd always be that kind of casual fun. I should deliver your mattresses more often," the headwoman teases. "Maybe it should be an annual tradition on your birthday. New mattress, me in ... well nothing much at all." Her fingers tighten in his though and she lets out a soft, happy sound. "I'm looking forward to that, I really am," she murmurs and turns her head to press a kiss to his cheek, another tilted up to his temple. The widening of eyes and the pure /smugness/ of K'del's expression goes a long way to noting exactly what he thinks of that particular idea. "Do love the way you think," he tells her, grinning. In the wake of her kisses, he lifts their conjoined hands to his own mouth, to press a light kiss there, and then; "Does taking a break mean I can't make long, lingering, adoring love to you?" "See? This is why we work," Milani murmurs up near his ear and smiles as that kiss touches down against her hand. "Mmm ... nooo, no it doesn't," is the soft answer with a low, intimate quality to it. "In fact, I think that's exactly the kind of break we should be taking. Lots of taking our time and really enjoying the fact that winter means staying inside and cuddling up by a fire," she continues and tilts her head back a little so he can see her smile. A little tug on his hand aims to draw him back with her as she starts to lean back into the couch cushions. "C'mon, Weyrleader ... show me what you've got," is her last tease for quite a long while. |
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