Logs:Experimental
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| RL Date: 29 March, 2015 |
| Who: H'vier, Lycinea, Z'riah |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Log |
| What: Lycinea decides to do an experiment. (Followed immediately by a second.) H'vier and Z'riah are her test dummies. Alcohol is involved. |
| Where: High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 20, Month 5, Turn 37 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: Irianke/Mentions, Tayte/Mentions, X'vae/Mentions |
| OOC Notes: Back-dated. Adult themes (kissing and discussion of sex, but no nookie~). Two scenes posted together because it made more sense to me that way as they're immediately back to back. +roll system used but as one roll, so the formatting of each roll is a little funny~ But it was fun to use it as a guide to play. |
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| She sits at his table with his deck of cards. She plays solitaire waiting for him to come home that night. She's not expected (but when is she?). There are two tumblers half full of an amber liquid, the one by her less full. Perhaps it started that way. Perhaps she's been drinking it. Fortunately for Lya, it's more difficult for H'vier to bring company up to his weyr when his dragon is so stubborn about his duty on the sands. He pauses when he sees the girl, but her presence isn't so surprising these days that he says much about it. The alcohol is unusual, though. "Rough day?" he asks as he passes by to do his typical changing into something more comfortable routine. "Mm, rough life, but that's nothing new." Lya answers in her typical 'just the way it is' fashion, reaching to pick up the glass near her. "I've heard it called liquid courage. Do you feel courageous when you imbibe?" Somehow, she makes the last word sound dirty. (And hot.) "No," says H'vier after a brief consideration. "Relaxed, maybe. I guess that could make some people feel more courageous in itself." Once he's finished changing, he approaches the table. "Does it make you feel courageous?" "Maybe a bit," Lya answers after consideration. "It's still awful." She stares at the stuff in the glass a moment before asking, "Wanna play cards?" "It's an acquired taste, I think. Or just knowing that it will make you feel better for awhile." H'vier moves to the other side of the table and sits, reaching for the second tumbler. "Sure. What are you playing?" Lya sighs, "Solitaire right now. Weyrwoman Irianke made me do a math brush up with the harpers," she makes the appropriate face, "so this helps me practice. You add up to thirteen and remove the cards from the triangle." She gestures with one hand and then uses that hand to pick up the cup and bring it to her lips for a tiny sip (another appropriate face that doesn't look all that different from her 'math' face). "Ugh. Anyway, this stuff," the booze,"makes it hard to do math now, so I'm just picking up cards now." And since he's said sure, she picks them up faster. "I want to play high card, where we each pull a card and the one with the high card asks the one with the lower card a question, which they have to answer honestly." She slides the cards toward him. "You shuffle so I can't cheat." Then she sips (and makes a face). H'vier listens while Lycinea explains what she's been doing. And what she'd like them to do now that he's here. The bronzerider has sort of played this game before, with Tayte. Just minus the cards with the addition of sex. The latter of which makes pretty much all things more bearable. He's probably less thrilled to play this game without that addition, but he doesn't take back his agreement. She's drinking. What's the worst that could happen? "They make sweeter drinks at Snowasis, you know," he tells her, shuffling the cards easily before putting the deck down on the table again. She doesn't have to suffer through his booze. "Well, you don't have any of them here, and I'm pretty sure they would still be gross," Lya tells him loftily, reaching for the first card. She flips it onto the table face up. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< H'vier reaches to flip the next card over. There's no indication that he's happy about getting the higher card, just the question that first comes to mind, "Why are you drinking in my weyr?" "Because I want to talk to you about something I don't know how to talk about and I'm drinking because I don't know how to start." Lya answers without hesitation. "Liquid courage," she intones like a mantra before lifting the glass of vile stuff and taking a slightly larger sip. Then she reaches to flip the next card. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< "There are other things you could take if you just want to be... less than yourself for awhile." H'vier doesn't offer any alternatives right now, though. He flips the next card and considers for a few moments before asking, "What do you want to talk about?" "I never want to be less myself. I want to know how to say things." Lya tells him as if that makes total sense with the drinking. She takes a breath. "Ever since the flight, Niahvth's flight, when I kissed you, I've been sometimes getting these weird feelings." That seems to be as much answer as he gets for that card for she reaches to flip the next, her cheeks pink already, and already not meeting his gaze. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< For his part, H'vier doesn't say anything that might make her more uncomfortable. Even his expression stays relatively neutral. The cards flip again and the bronzerider doesn't have to think about asking, "Weird feelings?" "Feelings like that, but less strong. Like... I'll get hot sometimes and I don't know, want things. ... People, I guess." Lya frowns, clearly her own body is doing this to spite her. She reaches out and flips a card. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< "Feelings like during the flight?" asks H'vier once he's flipped over his own card. Then he's reaching for the second tumbler to take a drink, before rising to his feet to look over his booze cabinet. There's got to be something smoother in here for Lya's sake. Lya makes a face, but it's probably a result of the sip she took and not H'vier's question. "Yeah, like the feelings that made me kiss you." Isn't that obvious? His question was dumb, so that's all she gets, turning over her next card and his at the same time. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< "Well, there's nothing wrong with that." But he has no problems kissing people, so he might be the best moral judge of this behavior. H'vier comes back with a bottle that he sets down on the table as he sits. A glance at the cards is followed by a rather more personal but curious, "How long have you been having your cycle, Lya?" Lya clearly hasn't had enough alcohol because her cheeks turn bright red when he asks that particular question and she gulps, only to then cough. And cough. When she's finally finished, she takes a breath. She manages an even tone and even to stare him down while she says. "Since I was sixteen and a half." A late bloomer, though that probably comes as no surprise, given the givens. She reaches for the next card, letting him turn his own this time, only to find it's finally her turn. "Do you want me or just the idea of me, in terms of all that kissing stuff?" By which she probably means sex. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< H'vier makes a sound that seems considering. Her answer must be interesting. Her question gives him pause, though, his brows furrowing like he doesn't entirely understand the question. "I want you." Assuming that will satisfy her, H'vier flips over another card and finishes off his glass so he can pour himself something from the bottle he just fetched. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< Lycinea lets out a breath of relief when it's her win again; that can only mean his answer was unsatisfying. "You don't want me just because I look a little like your ex?" She's waiting for his question, but already her hand is on the deck ready to flip another card. If the last question was confusing, this one is outright baffling. "No. Fuck, no," even. "If I only wanted you because you look a little like Tayte, I would've had you already. I'm over her. Trust me." H'vier looks at the cards for a few moments once they're flipped, takes another drink, then asks, "Are you afraid of me?" >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< The blonde looks at the cards for a moment too. "No. I know I should be, and that you've given me a lot of reasons to be, but I'm not." It's only half a breath later that she says, "I might like to kiss you, if I could be sure that's all it would be." She flips her card quickly, waits for him to do the same and then asks, "Could it ever be just a kiss?" >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< H'vier nods his head slowly at her answer. It's better than what he'd assumed she might say, judging by the vague sense of relief in his features. "I could kiss you without doing anything else to you," is really the only thing he can promise. "It doesn't mean I wouldn't want more." In case that's the answer she actually wants. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< "Would you kiss me now?" Lya asks after she flips cards for the both of them. Her eyes are intense and not afraid, but decidedly nervous. Probably the horrible alcohol is the only reason she hasn't run from the weyr already. "I said I wouldn't touch you, Lya. Not even if you wanted me to." Which, apparently, includes kissing her. H'vier probably should have thought that through better when he promised. "But I wouldn't object to you kissing me." Lya stares at him, but at least she's not frowning. She flips the next two cards, one for each of them. "Would you kiss me back if I did?" >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< H'vier watches the cards, though whether he hopes for a question of his own or not is unclear. He nods his head when she questions him. "Of course. Unless you objected." She rises. She lifts her glass and sips, probably half of what was there when they started has been consumed. Lya looks down at him indecisively. She reaches a hand and flips two more cards, looking at them before looking at him again. She asks quietly, vulnerably, "Do you want me to kiss you?" >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< He's very still when Lya rises, perhaps not wanting to spook her into taking off when he'd really rather she not. Her question makes H'vier close his eyes for a moment and draw in a deep, calming breath. He sighs it back out before saying, "Very much." Lycinea's hands move quite deliberately, one with the glass to her lips for a swallow as large as she dares, one to the cards. She flips them, glances briefly as she sets her glass on the table, and then moves around it to stand next to him, looking down at him and fidgeting a moment as she does. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< The cards are really not very much at the front of his mind just now, but he glances at them because Lya flips them. H'vier's gaze shifts back to her, but the only thing he can think to ask is, "Do you want me to move?" "No," Lya is trembling. That's how much nervous tension is in her frame, for all that she probably qualifies as close to drunk at this point given her lack of exposure to alcohol and how much of the hard stuff she's drunk since beginning the card game. She moves carefully to sit in his lap. Once there she exhales, looking up at him through her lashes. Her arms lift and curl slowly around his neck. She's almost certainly not drawing this out on purpose, but it is drawn out as she leans up and in, closer and closer, until her eyes are closed and her lips are pressed softly against his, still uncertain, her form still trembling there in his lap. H'vier, true to his word, keeps his hands to himself and lets Lya move at her own pace. Once her lips are pressed against his, he responds. It's gentle and slow, though, letting her decide just what sort of kiss this actually is. His hands come up reflexively, wanting to hold her or something, but he only barely brushes his fingertips against her thighs before they withdraw again. Such restraint. Perhaps it's the uncharacteristic restraint that give Lycinea the room to decide to deepen the kiss rather than pull away immediately. She presses lightly against him as her lips open, kiss becoming heated. He won't have much time with that experimental deepness though before it becomes overwhelming for the blonde, who pulls away, breathing hard and looking at the table, not him. She braces one hand against his chest and leans away from him, reaching with the other hand to flip the next cards. Sighing relief, as if she might not have been able to bring herself to ask otherwise, "Was that okay?" >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< He's really into the deepening thing, so there's a small groan of protest when she pulls away too soon. Too soon for him, anyway. H'vier doesn't try to keep her close, going so far as to hold onto the seat of his chair so his hands don't get other ideas, and his answer comes in nod form before he can manage a low, heated, "Very okay."
>---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< "Faranth, yes," murmurs H'vier without even a moment of hesitation to consider it. She probably can't expect much less of him, though. Moderation has never really been his strong suit. "You can touch me," Lya says just before she twists back around and in the same motion clumsily finds his lips with hers, the deepening happening sooner and daring to last longer before she seeks to break the kiss. Probably still too soon for his liking. H'vier is neither clumsy nor nervous, and he doesn't seem to mind if Lya is either of those things herself. He is tentative about touching her, but once he has and she doesn't withdraw, his eager hands shift around her thighs in a smooth effort to pull her further up his lap. As soon as she breaks away, though, his hands lift and he tilts his head back, eyes closed, to regulate his breathing. This time she doesn't immediately lean away, but rather shifts so she can press her ear to his chest and listen to his racing heart. After some moments, Lya straightens and twists to pull the next cards. "Will you call me a ride?" How long might she have put off this question if it had been H'vier's turn at the game? >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< This isn't a question he answers quite so immediately, but he does answer, after he draws in a deep breath, with a single nod. H'vier doesn't look at the cards again because he has more pressing things on his mind just now, waiting for Lya to remove herself from his lap. "Should be here in a few minutes," he assures her. She doesn't. What she does do is flip two more cards and look at him expectantly >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< H'vier doesn't have to look at the cards to know it's his question, but he doesn't have one ready to offer her. Certainly none he wants her leaving on. So he settles with, "Did you get what you wanted?" Lya considers the question as looks at the older man. "No," she decides and then leans to flip two more cards. She barely glances before sliding off his lap snagging up her customary satchel from under the table and walking (only a little wobbly) toward the ledge. "Game over," drifts from over her shoulder to where H'vier and the pair of tied aces are left behind. >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by Lycinea >------------------------< >---< NorCon: Dice Roll 13-sided die x 1 by H'vier >--------------------------< There's a weave to the way she crosses the length of the narrow weyr. Lya is only silent long enough to make sure Z'riah's roommate is out and that the greenrider doesn't have additional company before she's dropping her bag along the way too him and greeting him with, "I need you to kiss me." "Hey," is Z'riah's slightly concerned greeting for Lya, rising to meet her once she's most of the way through the weyr. But her greeting gives him pause. "Uh." That can't be right. "What?" Lya makes an annoyed noise and just lifts up onto her tiptoes in front of him, arms looping around his neck and pursing her lips just slightly as she closes her eyes. Well, Z'riah isn't going to ask again with her all against him and waiting, so he wraps his arms around her torso and kisses her like she said she needed him to. He's a good friend like that. Never mind that it's more heated than friendly. Lya return heat for heat, pulling herself tightly against him, her fingers sliding up the back of his neck and tangling into his hair as she lets her tongue slip experimentally into his mouth. It's a good experiment because she's just experimenting and he's gay, so. You know. If being gay is what he needs to be to get this sort of attention from Lya, Z'riah might be okay with it, after all. There's a groan when her tongue slips past his lips and his own meets it, though he's careful about not getting too intense. There are things between them he has much less control over, however. Given that Lya tastes like whiskey, Z'riah might get an idea about the source of this new freedom. She probably shouldn't let herself lean against him like that, she probably shouldn't moan just a little, but she does. Clearly, this kiss is doing something for her. It's doing quite a bit for Z'riah, too, but he's not exactly difficult to do anything for, all things told. It's not until the way she tastes really clicks with the weaving she'd done on her way to him that he starts drawing back, if somewhat reluctantly. "Lya," is a little rough, a little questioning. "Have you been drinking?" Lya makes a sound of protest that she probably didn't even know she knew how to make, a throaty half-moan, as he pulls away. She opens her eyes to look at him with disappointment and sighs. "Yes. I went to kiss H'vier. But I wasn't sure I should, I was almost sure I shouldn't, so I choked down some of what he had until I was less sure." It makes sense, right? Those sounds aren't helping the parts of Z'riah he probably wishes weren't quite so interested in the less than completely sober young woman. "Why would you-- never mind." He doesn't really want to know what she was doing with H'vier right now. "Are you sure now?" "Yes," Lya tells him, but the word is a little slurred. Drunk Lya is sure and that means nothing to Sober Lya who will doubtlessly re-manifest at some point. "I want to and you're not stopping me and you're gay anyway so." Somehow there's logic at work here. Possibly. If she were anyone else, Z'riah probably wouldn't care that she'd been drinking. Not even a little bit. But this is Lya, the girl who practically beat him up for trying to kiss her the last time she was here. "We can kiss, if that's what you want, Lya," he assures her. But that's it, is the suggested implication. Lya sighs. Why is he making this so difficult! "No, it's fine. I'm done. Can you call me a ride?" Apparently that was it? She sounds annoyed, though (not that that's very unusual). "No," says Z'riah. "Not until you're yourself again." And since she gave it to him more obviously than usual, the greenrider doesn't hide his attempt to readjust the uncomfortable angle of his erection. "Do you want some... water?" If Lya hadn't been drinking, her reaction to said adjustment would probably be more spectacular. As is, she just sighs, "Z'riah, remind your penis I don't have one." She rolls her eyes at him and turns away before flopping into a seat and shifting enough back on it that she can let her head hang upsidedown off the other side, since he's keeping her hostage. "My penis is perfectly fucking fine with you not having one," returns Z'riah with an edge of irritation. What does a greenrider have to do these days to prove he's not gay! Probably nothing he's currently willing to do with Lya. "Have you ever even really looked at one before? Have you ever touched one?" He's pretty sure he already knows the answers to these questions, but it's better than paying attention to the way she's sitting. Chances are good that anything Z'riah might try would only convince Lya that he's confused about his naturally obvious sexual orientation. Blind stereotyping, it's a killer. It's probably good that she's intoxicated and good that she's not looking at him. It probably makes it easier to bear the way she answers, without hesitation. "Yes, but I never wanted to." That makes him frown, but he seems hesitant to take advantage of the opportunity to ask her about it. "I mean... without expectation. No pressure to do anything for the person it's attached to." Which is really why they tend to be so off-putting, right? Other than the whole looking weird thing. He doesn't outright offer himself, anyway, but says, "I'm sorry people have been so shitty to you, Lya." "No, just the one guy. And I was like. Seven. Or ten." Possibly seven through ten. Lya lifts a hand to dismiss it. Perhaps Z'riah has a new understanding now. The blonde lifts her butt and shimmies down the beanbag chair a bit so her head is supported and so she can look at Z'riah. "Not everyone is loved as they should be. Not everyone is protected by anyone. It's just how things are." If she has issues with her awful experiences, she doesn't seem like it, even intoxicated, beyond the way they have obviously manifested in her approach to intimacy. "I love you, Lya." It's really the only thing Z'riah can think to say given the circumstances. He starts to move so he can kick the other bean bag closer to her and then settle into it. "You're more protected than you think," is probably supposed to be comforting, even if it doesn't do her younger self much good. "Yeah, I know," is her simple answer. "And I love you too. I even like you. And I can take care of myself now." Lya thinks she can anyway. "Can we kiss some more?" It's an idle sort of question. Something to do until she sobers up! Z'riah considers the question before he nods his head and feigns a long-suffering sigh. "Sure, I guess. If it'll make you feel better." Because Faranth knows he's not enjoying it at all, given that he's so gay and she's so female. "You could call me a ride and let me go find other people to try kissing." Since she's his hostage. The next thought seems to occur to her suddenly, "Will your roommate be back soon? He's only half-gay, so maybe it would be different with him even if I like the way you look better." Lya sounds perfectly sincere in her sharing of this drunk logic. "I'd really rather kiss you myself," Z'riah assures her. As for X'vae, his brow furrows and he says, "No." Maybe a little too emphatically. "Anyway, he's sworn off anything sexual. I guess maybe that makes him perfect for you." He doesn't sound particularly happy about that idea. "Come here. I can't grind on you if you're on me." Not necessarily true, but more difficult, at least! Lya makes a snorting noise. "No, he doesn't get me. You might be perfect for me if you weren't a greenrider. And if I liked sex, because you like it a lot and I don't think I'd want to share you, which means we'd have to have so much of it until you got too old for it," she frowns as she ramblingly stumbles upon this gem: "You're younger than H'vier by a lot by still older than me. Aren't I too young for you?" Immediately followed by, "Are you going to kiss me?" Nevermind that she hasn't moved more than to now offer up a hand so he can help her up. Z'riah listens to her rambling without much commenting of his own. If he can't convince her that he's perfectly fond of vaginas and breasts, there's not really much point arguing about why him being a greenrider doesn't mean a damned thing. He draws in a breath to answer about her age, but sighs it back out when she says the rest. He leans over to try catching her hand so he can pull her onto him where he's cradled quite comfortable in his own bean bag. "Age loses relevancy." She might be too young for him, but it won't keep him from kissing her. And kiss him she will. It will be a long and intense (and hot hot hot) make-out session that ends with her curled in his lap, head to his shoulder, trustingly asleep. Hopefully, Z'riah didn't need to get up to pee. The greenrider is as gentlemanly as possible for him to be while also very much enjoying making out with Lya. He might be a little grope-y, but nothing that's overbearing. Wanting to touch the person he's making out with is just reflexive! In the end, Z'riah does need to get up for one reason or another, but he settles Lya down in his bed along the way to let her sleep off her inebriation. She does. If he joins her, she curls against him. When she wakes, her eyes flutter slowly, groggily, and groans. "Morning," says Z'riah, quite cheerfully, when Lya starts to wake up. "Thirsty?" he asks, but he's already moving to scoot off the bed to get her some water. There's practically a bounce in his step once he hits the floor. Lya's looking at him. From the time his mouth opens. She licks her lips. Her dry lips. Her chapped lips. Making out really does a number on the unaccustomed. Maybe she doesn't want to talk to him. Her look is so intent as she follows him with only her eyes, shifting just enough in the covers to keep following him. Finally, "Please." The greenrider is shirtless, wearing comfortable pants. Not the same clothes she saw him in last. His hair is mussed, but attractively so. Z'riah comes back with water, offering one of his oh so charming smiles, "For you." "Thank you," is quiet. Lya continues to watch him with guarded expression. It's after she's had a little water that she speaks again. "We kissed last night." Her cheeks color lightly, "A lot." This is not a question, so at least it seems she remembers. "We did," Z'riah agrees, offering a quirked half-grin. "It was very nice. But we didn't do anything else." Because the greenrider has probably been with plenty of people who were drunk enough to need that assurance. Or lack of it, as the case may have been. "How's your head?" "I kissed H'vier last night," Lya says then, as if she might not have heard him. Promptly, one hand is needed to hide her face the best it can while the other does it's best not to lose the water glass. That gives the greenrider a moment's pause, brows furrowing despite his cheerfulness up to this point. "On purpose?" he has to wonder. "Did he..." Z'riah lets that question trail off to leave it open for her interpretation. "Yes," Lya sighs into her hand and then rubs her face a moment before sipping the water. "He was very well-behaved. Didn't try anything." After a little more water she says, "I'm not sure I liked any of it." Nevermind that she seemed to like it well enough with Z'riah last night. "No?" The fact that Z'riah seems dubious can probably be attributed to just how well she did seem to like it while it was happening. "Well, you don't have to do it if you don't like it. Maybe keep clear of alcohol, though." "No." She misinterprets. "He didn't touch me, except after I told him he could. And then... not much, anyway. I only kissed him twice," which is many fewer times than Lya kissed Z'riah. Her cheeks are faintly touched with color. "I wouldn't have kissed him otherwise. I wanted to see. If I might like it. It was weird. And wet. And made me feel hot and funny." She's frowning. "Horny," Z'riah offers the word for what he can only imagine she's trying to say. It certainly made him horny, but he won't point that out for her sake. "Be careful around him, yeah? He might get the wrong idea about things and think you want more than you really do." "Ugh, why do you have to say that," Lycinea expresses her disgust with the appropriate face. "Isn't horny supposed to, I don't know, feel good? People are always having sex and claiming it feels good. They don't go around saying, 'why, that was wet, uncomfortable and awkward, let's do it again,'" the blonde looks disgusted by the whole lousy ordeal and stares at the empty water glass dourly. Z'riah shouldn't laugh, but he can't help it. "Horny doesn't feel good. It's frustrating and uncomfortable. Probably less awkward for you than anyone capable of getting a hard on." But he's also kind of biased. Boners can be awkward. "Haven't you ever had an orgasm?" Lya is used to being laughed at, but not by Z'riah. She glares at him for laughing, glares at him for asking, her cheeks red. "No," is through clenched teeth before she jerks her arm out to extend the glass to him. "Get me more water," you worthless excuse for an understanding friend, you! He'll take the glass and he does stop laughing, though more likely because he's done laughing than because she doesn't like it. "That's your problem," he says as he starts to turn away to pour her another glass of water. "Getting off is what feels good. It's what makes being horny worthwhile." Z'riah comes back, sipping at her water before handing it over again. "You really never have? Not even by yourself?" This is apparently difficult for him to process. "No," Lycinea glares more, taking the water but staring at it as if it might be infected. Nevermind that they've shared drinks before and it was never an issue. Z'riah doesn't seem sure what else to say. He knows Lya well enough not to just tell her she should, and well enough not to offer his own assistance. So instead he just looks at her with an awkward, pensive half smile. It's in that silence when Lya tries to look oh-so-focused on the many minutiae of water drinking that her cheeks steadily brighten to as close to ruby as they'll ever come. "Look," she finally says with plentiful 'tude, "it's not that easy, okay? And it's probably not worth all the effort anyway. And I have five roommates." So it's not like she has any privacy. His smile turns less awkward, more fond, when she answers him in more typical fashion. "I've heard that. That it's hard for some women." Z'riah doesn't really have this problem. In fact, "It used to be too easy for me. When I was your age." Lya probably doesn't appreciate how horrible that was. "But I think you'll be okay if you can relax. I could even clear out the weyr sometime if you wanted to try here." He's a great friend like that. "But it might be easier with someone else. Someone you trust. Either way, it's definitely worth the effort." He might, of course, be biased. Lycinea siiiighs. She's so red she might as well get a stem and call herself a redfruit; it would almost certainly be simpler than to find an answer for him. "I don't... I don't trust a lot of people." She sighs. "And I'm attracted to even less people. And I could ask H'vier, but I don't want to. Why is it even important? Why can't people just go through life and not worry about getting off?" She glowers the the water glass like it has answers and just isn't telling. "They could, I guess. If they really wanted to. I'd be miserable, but I suppose that's just the way some people are." Z'riah has his doubts about it, but he's been wrong about lots of things in his life. "The only thing I think is important, though, is that you're not interested because you really aren't interested and not because some worthless assholes have done unforgivable things to you." The greenrider's face is expressive, but the mixture of emotions he feels about this are difficult to pin down. "Of course you'd be miserable. You're a greenrider. Everyone knows greenrider are wanton." Lya might be only teasing him, but given what else she's professed to believe about greenriders, she might be entirely serious. "I don't see why I'm not interested as being particularly relevant to not doing it." She sighs, holding the cup out to him for him to take, evidently done with it even though there's still water remaining. Z'riah studies Lya for several moments, emotions fading into something more neutral. Then he takes the glass away from her and goes to put it away. "Fine, whatever." He sounds annoyed. And maybe frustrated. "Do or don't do whatever you want. I can give you a ride down when you're ready." Apparently he's done with that particular conversation. "Zif," Lya's tone is unhappy now, affected. She hates that, the times she cares. "Come back, please?" Her voice is smaller, plaintive. This is a request, not an order like with the water. She's looking at him with sad, frustrated eyes. How did they get here? Even more quietly, "I don't like it when we fight." "This isn't fighting, Lya. This is me submitting to your superior knowledge of yourself." And even if Z'riah doesn't sound happy about it, it's at least genuine. He's not seriously going to suggest she try anything she's not totally comfortable doing. He settles with his arms crossed over his chest and his shoulder leaning against the outer wall of his alcove. He's 'back'. But he's looking at some point on the bed, not at her. Lya sighs, and then shifts to crawl toward him and settle herself so their thighs touch. "But you're mad about it," she tries coaxing. It's not the kind of thing she has much experience doing, but she's trying it. Pushing boundaries! Can't Z'riah just call this a win? "I'm not mad," Z'riah counters. Which isn't entirely true. He is kind of mad, just not about it. "I just don't like not being able to help my friends. And I can't help you with this, Lya." "I know," Lya says softly, because he's gay, "but that's not your fault. Sometimes I guess friends can't help each other. And I don't feel like I really need help, just... someone to listen and not judge me." She reaches to take his hand. "You know, if you don't want people to judge you, you probably shouldn't be so sharding judgmental yourself." Her softness isn't going to win him over in that regard, but Z'riah won't keep her from taking his hand. "What do you want from me, Zif? Do you want me to believe you when you say you're not gay? And you want me? Because that makes all of this," Lya squeezes her hand, her voice tired, "very, very complicated." Does he want that? "I don't know. I don't think anything needs to be complicated. It's not like I expect you to actually want anything to happen between us." Except using him as a safety net for making out, evidently. "But it's like you, I guess. No one wants to be judged." Z'riah turns his hand in hers to hold it back. "If you want to pretend I'm gay, knock yourself out. I love dicks. They're one of my favorite things." See, he'll even make it easy for her. "But try to tone down the greenbashing, hmm?" "It would be complicated," Lya insists with a frown. "If I decided I wanted you? That's complicated for me, Zif. I'm not..." He hesitates, looking fraught in the silence that ensues. "It's not easy for me Zif. Even if I'd had the perfect life, I don't think it'd be easy for me. I'm just different." She sighs, releasing his hand and starting to shift away. The greenbashing? Well, she just doesn't address that. (It's not her fault if he's going to try to buck the facts of life.) "Life is complicated, Lya. If you want something, you want something. There's nothing complicated about that." Z'riah has an abundance of unwanted first hand experience with the wanting, even. "I don't know what I'm supposed to tell you. That I wouldn't fuck you, anyway? Should I tell you to fuck off the next time you get drunk and want to make out?" He's really not sure. Lya might've made some answer to the first, but she's distracted by making a disgusted sound. "Why do people," Z'riah included, "have to be so coarse! Why can't sex mean anything to anyone but holders?" She screws up her face before saying, "I don't want to have sex with a holder just to have some manners about it." At least she doesn't say 'making love.' "Just because someone calls it fucking doesn't mean it doesn't mean anything to them." Z'riah sounds frustrated, but that's as far into an argument as he makes it. Granted, most of his sex is pretty meaningless. Instead of wandering away again, though, the greenrider crawls back up his bed to flop down on his stomach and hug a pillow under his head. "I thought you just said you didn't want sex in the first place, anyway." "I don't," Lya replies, ignoring the rest, as she's proving adept at in this conversation. "But I'll have to some day with someone, so I'm not one of those weird old virgins." She sighs. Maybe being a weird old virgin is beginning to sound appealing. "You can get off without having sex," Z'riah points out like he doesn't think she's grasping this concept well enough. "And there's no point in having sex at all if you aren't going to get off somehow." Words of wisdom from Old Z'riah. "Don't do it because you think you're supposed to." "I don't care about getting off," Lya's disgruntled now. Hasn't she said as much? If not, oh well. "I mean just so that if some day there is someone I want to have sex with, it won't be a weird thing that I've never done it before." That's a good enough reason to have sex, right? She seems to think it's the only logical one. "Okay. Well. You know what's best for you." And that's where Z'riah will leave it. She's a little agitated as she moves to slide off the bed. "Would you please call me a ride?" Because Lya doesn't want to stay here anymore. Not now. "Sure," says Z'riah since he'd already said he was going to anyway. And now he actually will. He flips over onto his back once she's off the bed and tucks one of his arms to rest his head on. "Be a few minutes." "Thanks." And that's it, because then Lya's going to the ledge to wait. It's possible the thanks was for more than just the ride, but after everything? Maybe not. |
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