Logs:To Tell
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| RL Date: 27 May, 2012 |
| Who: Brieli |
| Involves: High Reaches Weyr |
| Type: Vignette |
| What: Brieli struggles with issues of information, secrets and empathy - as other candidates keep her awake the evening of the celebration at High Reaches Hold. |
| Where: Candidate Quarters, High Reaches Weyr |
| When: Day 21, Month 11, Turn 28 (Interval 10) |
| Mentions: Azaylia/Mentions |
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| One thing she always struggled with was how much to tell. It was impossible to sleep on the night of the engagement celebration; somehow Azaylia of all people had managed to send some nearby girls into an uproar over something she'd said about the Lord of High Reaches, and they couldn't stop hissing their outrage at one another in between whispered gossip. That, along with her thoughts, kept her wide awake - and her pillow could only muffle the others' idiot complaining. She pulled it tighter around her head to try and smother her mind to sleep, but it was never that easy. As she'd been told by an uncle, one returned to them changed after turns of hard labor, information is power, and the more you give up, the less power you have. She'd seen example of this time and again - they were all there if you looked for them - so it had stuck with her, become a mantra as she began her journey to the Weyr. It'd kept her mouth shut and her ears open. And it was fascinating to see how many people would take that lack of information as an invitation to fill in the blanks about themselves or others. She was certainly grateful for it - she knew more than she'd ever expected due to the compulsion - but some of it nagged at her conscience. Her uncle never told her that information could grow empathy in the most unlikely of places. She told herself that her feelings were completely immaterial in the situation; one does not make plans for turns and compromise them over some little issues. Weaknesses she couldn't afford. But some weaknesses had to be calculated. She'd always put off the decision of how much to tell when she found potential allies - she'd also told herself there was no sense in worrying over things that hadn't yet come up. Now... It was possible. Sometimes, it was necessary to secure trust to give up something. More than you've already mistakenly given up, she thought. There wasn't much, but she'd been less-than-careful here and there. Too surprised or too angry to entirely cover. Now she was worrying. Starting to stress over every little mistake - her neighbors would surely be complaining over her teeth grinding as she slept tonight. Shifting in her cot, wrapping her pillow around her head and squeezing her eyes shut so tight she almost saw stars, she tried to will herself to sleep. She'd had a lot of advice over her young life, enough to echo and make herself sound wise. But the one thing she'd learned all on her own was that sometimes, you just have to wing it. |
Comments
Azaylia (Dragonshy) left a comment on Sun, 27 May 2012 21:37:31 GMT.
In some way I am less confused, and in another way I am still very confused. I think that was the intention. *grins* Secrecy~
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